back to the grind
I have been on spring break for the past week and it is suddenly coming to an end. I was hoping that if I just chilled out enough all week I would be so bored by the time school started back up that I would be able to find some motivation again. It isn't feeling like that is going to be the case.
My house is so dirty its almost unlivable so my goal for the day is to clean. Every dish, utensil, etc is dirty and taking over my kitchen counters. My kitchen has been off limits to my friends for a week now. I've pretty much just been living at Jeff's and stopping at my house to hang out with Duke for a bit and make more of a mess.
I also have to finish my scene design project by tomorrow. That shouldn't take me too long though, its pretty much just like coloring. heh. I am wayyy behind in my image methodology book project. Sooo i need to get to working on making spreads for that today and tomorrow. but most of all I have to do my fucking crew hours. I am dreading it and it is giving me way too much fucking anxiety but I have to at least get 10-20 hours done to feel like I will definitely pass my class.
It's March 22nd and by April 16th I am supposed to have 40 hours done. I have zero. I have Easter break from April 9-13th. That gives me 13 days. If I went in for 3 hours a day I would only be one hour short. I highly doubt I can make myself do that, but if I try I should end up with at least 10-20...which wouldn't be so bad. I can go from 10-1 each day....i don't want to!
That photo shoot gig is at last finalized! It's Saturday the 28th. I was so confident when first approached about it but now it is totally freaking me out! I'm dumb.
Sarah just wrote me saying that she has completed all of her readings for the rest of the semester and now only has two papers and one presentation for the rest of her college career. Of course I am happy for her but it makes me so jealous. Sometimes Sarah and her life is just too perfect! She works two jobs and has an internship and is ahead in all of her classes and I am so fucking behind! Plus she has no anxiety, is rarely if ever depressed, and still has time to socialize and maintain a wonderful relationship with Jimmy. NOT FAIR. Why must I be this wayyyyy?!
Okay, I'm going to try and make myself get shit done instead of feeling sorry for myself. heh
My house is so dirty its almost unlivable so my goal for the day is to clean. Every dish, utensil, etc is dirty and taking over my kitchen counters. My kitchen has been off limits to my friends for a week now. I've pretty much just been living at Jeff's and stopping at my house to hang out with Duke for a bit and make more of a mess.
I also have to finish my scene design project by tomorrow. That shouldn't take me too long though, its pretty much just like coloring. heh. I am wayyy behind in my image methodology book project. Sooo i need to get to working on making spreads for that today and tomorrow. but most of all I have to do my fucking crew hours. I am dreading it and it is giving me way too much fucking anxiety but I have to at least get 10-20 hours done to feel like I will definitely pass my class.
It's March 22nd and by April 16th I am supposed to have 40 hours done. I have zero. I have Easter break from April 9-13th. That gives me 13 days. If I went in for 3 hours a day I would only be one hour short. I highly doubt I can make myself do that, but if I try I should end up with at least 10-20...which wouldn't be so bad. I can go from 10-1 each day....i don't want to!
That photo shoot gig is at last finalized! It's Saturday the 28th. I was so confident when first approached about it but now it is totally freaking me out! I'm dumb.
Sarah just wrote me saying that she has completed all of her readings for the rest of the semester and now only has two papers and one presentation for the rest of her college career. Of course I am happy for her but it makes me so jealous. Sometimes Sarah and her life is just too perfect! She works two jobs and has an internship and is ahead in all of her classes and I am so fucking behind! Plus she has no anxiety, is rarely if ever depressed, and still has time to socialize and maintain a wonderful relationship with Jimmy. NOT FAIR. Why must I be this wayyyyy?!
Okay, I'm going to try and make myself get shit done instead of feeling sorry for myself. heh