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[spilling_poetry]

i lost my job on the 3rd of december. right-O, kids, i am unemployed. but the job search goes on; rather started this afternoon. we're broke. we DID christmas. presents for all immediate blood relatives and in-laws to be. harassing phone calls from creditors and an appetite for alcohol have made for an interesting but not totally riveting

Comments

[livinonluv]

you just need to force yourself to break out and start doing something productive. i always feel better when i'm job hunting becuase at least i'm getting something accomplished even if i don't get any of them. and i must proclaim at the top of my screaming lungs that DAY TIME TELEVISION IS NEVER THE ANSWER, HAZEL!!! my lady, pull yourself together. you obviously know your problems and their symptoms and that leads me to the conclusion that you also know the road out of your slump, but your just having too much fun wallowing in the beautifulness of pain and depression. i do the same thing, but it only works for so long until you piss off everyone around you enough that they'd rather not be around. wish i was there or you here or whatever but simple truth is you are strong enough to pull out of this yourself, and you know your own strength. you just prefer to indulge in the pretty hate machine... misery is more pure than happiness (or at least it feels that way), but you can't get swallowed in it. only small excursions, weekend trips, you know, that kind of thing. otherwise, before you know it, the climb out is seemingly impossible and your reduced motivation makes it even more so.

so get out there! start slowly... one thing at a time, but i'd start with the job thing. ease yourself back into real life... YOU CAN DO IT!! i know you, and you are strong. you just choose to ignore it sometimes.