[Translation] Popolo 06.2013 - Koyama Solo Interview
Popolo 06.2013 - NEWS 10th Anniversary
"Me and NEWS, 10 years of love tracks"
Solo Interview Vo.1 ~ Koyama Keiichiro
Koyama's debut was decided only 2 years and half after he became a Junior. Before the debut though he was secretly groping for the right path to choose.
Honestly when I heard about my debut it felt like it wasn't really happening to me. I entered the agency on the 21th January 2001, my story as a Junior was short, not more than just 2 years and half. I was just about to understand what it means to be a Johnny's. It felt like it was a club activity or some class you take after school. Moreover I hadn't yet decided that that was the job of my life. Inside of me I decided to quit JE if I couldn't debut before turning 20. I thought I couldn't do this for my whole life, I got myself ready to the possibility of not debuting. I entered the agency during high school, I wasn't really aware of my life, I looked at myself in the shiny world of JE as an outsider. I decided to go to university in the case I wasn't able to debut. Doing that I would have been able to graduate and find a job, moreover I wanted to avenge myself for failing once the entrance exam in high school. I really wanted to enter a good university, I choose and successfully entered Meiji university. Without a debut I would become a normal university student and later search an employment...That's what I thought back then.
NEWS debuted as a 9 members group, two years later they became 6. I think now they can honestly tell their real feelings back then...
I entered university in 2003. I turned 19 one month later. Only one year more to the twenties. I didn't know what to do in that year...and then NEWS' debut was confirmed. I was really surprised. When I knew about the group foundation I thought "Maybe now I can start dreaming about this job!". The option of quitting the agency disappeared, I decided to do my best as idol and university student at the same time. I thought I was lucky because I could enjoy double life and I was ready to start.
Anyway the reality was a little different from my expectations. Yamapi was the center since we were Juniors, me and Shige danced on the back corners. When NEWS debuted it didn't look like I couldn't go on the first raw besides Yamapi. It was hard to fill up that distance... I started my career in JE only 2 years and half before, of course it wasn't enough to stand there. And so I fell back and back. I was desperate trying to reach Yamapi. Even so, I wasn't really worried back then. That world was so pretty, I was being noticed too. The staff told me "You succeeded!" and there was the great voice of support of fans that I never heard before. I finally reached a great stage. Thinking about it now, I wasn't really ready for that. Back then I was simply happy for the debut. I had no worry at all, it was a funny, happy time.
Let's go on seeing what happened in his path after these days of pure joy.
When Uchi left in 2005 it was a huge shock to me. I got really along with Uchi, we were good friends. He's from Kansai and I'm from Tokyo, but we didn't feel any distance between us. We also got to sing together some times, because we were kind of similar. I still think that if he stayed with us until now we would have been able to create something really interesting. Remaining in 6 members the year later was another shock. It was because we were losing members of course, but I also had some shameful thought: "Why?! Why everybody has to leave?!". Back then I couldn't talk like this out loud to anybody. That was our worst time, we talked to each other too little. We were too embarrassed to express our real feelings to each other, we were all still young to open our hearts honestly. We were also too proud. I'm sure some members were restraining themselves, others didn't want to hurt anybody's feelings. When we were Juniors we were all in different groups, honestly, it was difficult to reveal our real selves to each other.
When Koyama turned 25 he was lost once again on what to do. What was the turning point?
My biggest turning point after NEWS became 6 was my 25th birthday. I didn't know anymore what I could do. I began questioning myself "What can Koyama Keiichiro really do?" and the answer was "I have nothing left". Really, I couldn't think of anything. Nothing relevant happened, it was simply a personal critic moment. Maybe I started doubting because the entertainment world had become so vague for me. I seemed to ride the waves but I wasn't doing it for real. What do I want to do as a Johnny's? Who do I want to become? I changed the way to face myself as a person. I created my basis and axis asking myself those questions. Right when I was thinking about what I can do and what I want to do, NEWS were chosen as main personalities in "24hTV". I was lost but somehow I wanted to learn the sign language, I asked a possibility to do it to the show. I studied, learnt the sign language and I was able to communicate with deaf children. The producer of "News Every" saw that and said "It's amazing you can use the sign language! I'm sure you can become a journalist too", so he chose me as newscaster for the show. In my troubled moment I got to challenge something new, I think that everything happened with a perfect timing. I realized that my worries had a meaning. My worries didn't clear up all at once, but I found a path where I could work hard again, a breach opened. I felt like I was finally showing Koyama Keiichiro as an individual person.
But still NEWS were only dragged along by Yamapi and Ryo-chan. I still think to NEWS with them standing on the front. That's why I personally wanted to pay my contribute to NEWS too, I wanted my solo activities to be useful to the group too. Looking at the groups of our senpais too, every one of them had a different personality, I admired groups where every member had his own "field". I wanted to have mine too and I find it in being a newscaster. I decided to do my best in that, to do it with all my might. I'm still studying the sign language too because it's an important thing to me.
The biggest turning point for NEWS was 1 year and half ago. Yamashita and Nishikido withdrew. Koyama was one of the person who lived the backstage of this shocking news.
NEWS lost its members before too, but I always thought that we could go on. That confidence came by the fact that Yamapi and Ryo-chan were there. As long as they're here NEWS will be fine.
And then we suddenly had to face their withdrawal. I think they started feeling vaguely lost while we were still active. The reality is that maybe I should have asked them straightly. But I was also afraid to ask. I talked a lot with Yamapi but I couldn't ask him that.
That day we met in a room of the agency with all our staff. Yamapi spoke first. "I quit" he said. But you know, me, Shige, Massu and Tegoshi should have known it already. "This time has come in the end". We couldn't say a word. I thought to myself "Let's talk about it some more" and "I should have asked him before". Anyway, now I can look back at it and I think that Yamapi's decision was amazing. Being in a group you have a vague idea of your future, it takes a big resolution to decide to abandon that future and challenge a new one by yourself. Of course in that moment I couldn't forgive him though (laughs).
Then a representative of the agency asked "Nishikido, what do you want to do?" and Ryo-chan replied "I quit too, I'll go on with Kanjani8". After all if Ryo-chan didn't quit one group, his schedule would have got too exhausting. But losing two members all at once? It was so sudden I couldn't fully understand, I couldn't understand NEWS as 4 members even later. What could we do? In that moment we were all extremely worried.
Then we four gathered with the staff, we talked about our possible future and somebody suggested us to disband too, almost everybody thought it was impossible to go on. One single person though said "Do your best". I believed in those words and I went to talk to the representative of the agency. I had to move or NEWS would disappear... I said to the staff many and many times "I want NEWS to go on". I kept contacting Shige, Massu and Tegoshi too. I told them "If NEWS disband all our activities will cease too. Let's keep alive the group we built until now. Let's shoulder our history". I talked and talked with each one of them. I think that Massu and Tegoshi were really worried, because they could go on and have success as Tegomass. But that option was very scary. I wanted them to stay with NEWS at all costs. Of course I knew that they loved NEWS too. My only thought was that I didn't want to regret not expressing my feelings to them. I talked a lot with Shige too. He's my companion with my same belief since Juniors days. Shige tried to think coldly but he was scared too. That period was painful, extremely exhausting. I stayed home sitting on my sofa and just crying, I woke up in the morning and I started crying naturally. The days passed and I couldn't understand anything. Thinking about it now, those tears were my fear to lose NEWS. Anyway, I kept thinking that I had to do all the possible. The source of that energy were the fans. I was pushed by all the many voices saying "Please protect NEWS", and I went on.
A deep love for NEWS and fans. The strong resolution come at the end of the suffering. Now everything's clear.
Right at that moment I had many opportunity to visit the places devastated by the earthquake as newscaster. The withdrawal was decided but we still didn't announce it publicly. The victims of the earthquake told me "Please, come again with all NEWS!", "I want to see your concert soon!". Between them somebody even said "When the earthquake began I grabbed my NEWS albums and ran out of home!". But I knew that two members already left. I had to announce such a sad news to people who are our fans and that moreover were living such a painful time...It was so hard. That's when I realized something: "We have to go on with NEWS, even if we're 4 we need to have a concert in the places struck by the earthquake!". The voices of those fans were the first reason that brought us back to life. I started loving the fans' NEWS once again. The day before the public announcement I talked with "News Every"'s producer. I told him "Tomorrow I'm going to be in the news. We don't know yet what will happen to NEWS. Can I still work in the show?". I was working there because I'm "NEWS' Koyama Keiichiro"...that's what I've always thought. Then, the producer replied "I didn't hire a NEWS' member. I chose Koyama Keiichiro as human being, nothing will change to my decision after tomorrow's announcement". I was so happy. I realized I'm working with such good people full of love. Thanks to those words my attachment to NEWS grew even stronger. The kind words by many people became my support.
But still nothing was decided for NEWS' future. Tegomass were having their tour so we decided to talk all together at its end. I wanted them to focus properly on their tour. Tegomass were giving courage and positive energy to the fans in their shiny world, I thought it was wrong to be all gloomy and ask for NEWS at that moment.
During Tegomass tour I heard about their concerts in different places, the additional stages, etc. I was happy Tegomass were doing so great but I was also nervous, thinking that the possibilities for NEWS were growing thinner. Anyway I went to watch Tegomass' live. There they sang "Sakura Girl" and I started crying. I realized that our love for NEWS was the same after all. I decided to believe in them.
A new beginning was decided. Koyama became the group leader, the dreams for the future of NEWS...
After the end of Tegomass' tour we gathered again to talk, we decided to take it easy and try to satisfy each member. Then I said: "If we let this finish here it's only because of our egos. Please, listen more carefully to the fans". NEWS was left with only 4 members, but also with many fans who decided to stay. We lost members but I felt like we gained one more. Because fans became one member of NEWS. Right now I really feel like our members increased (laughs).
No other group in JE experienced something like this. We lost members, we were asked to disband, but still we went on...It never happened before. After this nothing can scare us anymore. We have nothing left to lose. We restarted, we released "Chankapaana" and "World Quest", NEWS' history is growing up little by little. Recently I got to talk about NEWS with people I don't know and I heard them say often "Is it the 4 members group?". This makes me really happy. NEWS is getting known as a 4 members group, I'm glad.
I think that from now on it's important to raise our personal abilities and to use them to help the group. Being in 4 we can't deceive anybody. I feel our individuality is more exposed now. That's why I think it's essential to nurture these individualities.
A last thing I want to express are my feelings of thankfulness towards Yamapi and Ryo-chan. They're obviously the foundations on which NEWS was created, NEWS grew up thanks to them too. Our activities with 6 people gave us the opportunity to have a brand new start in 4. I never hated them. Even though sometimes I couldn't forgive them (laughs). Sometimes I couldn't stand watching their new works too. But now I can observe them work hard again. Because I understood that we have allies. Around us we have so many supporters...I finally realized this and now I'm fine.
Right now I wish for the happiness of all the original NEWS members, included Yamapi and Ryo-chan. I want us to be happy, become old men and laugh about the past all together. Like "We lost too many members!" (laughs). It would be real happiness if we'll be able to talk like "Back then I was thinking like that" or "It was a real hard time back then".
We won't lose. We will never lose. We could preserve NEWS and we will make the fans happy! We made them cry and be sad a lot. From now on I want to make NEWS fans happier than any other fan. Take care of us. Let's create new memories together.
[Even if we all know and heard their personal stories so many times it's always nice to read them once again, with the years the details increase too. The debut part was adorable, it's cute that Koyama tried to compete with Yamapi and the other main members while being all cheerful. I'm a little sad that after so many years they still cannot mention properly Kusano, anyway I was moved by Koyama's words about Uchi. The moment he talked about its hidden thoughts back then, and what he said later, made me realize a point of view I never considered...that after all JE groups are made of boys/men. And as such they are too proud and embarrassed to talk heart to heart about their feelings as girls would do. I guess many issues they had came from that too, as Koyama said.
It's always painful to read about the withdrawal of Yamapi and Ryo, this time he gave us some report of their meeting and it felt so real. I'm sorry Koyama felt somehow "responsible" because he didn't have the courage to face Yamapi and Ryo directly before it was too late...It's great to feel his resolution and confidence now that everything passed though. I'm thankful for his nice words to fans and to RyoPi, I had times in which I couldn't forgive them too, we all did/do, so I can understand well.]
This interview is pretty long but it's totally worth reading, both for old NEWS fans and new ones. I know that many of you didn't know NEWS when they were 9-8-or 6 so it's a good way to have an idea of everything that happened in the group's history.
Enjoy and prepare the tissues! ♥
"Me and NEWS, 10 years of love tracks"
Solo Interview Vo.1 ~ Koyama Keiichiro
Koyama's debut was decided only 2 years and half after he became a Junior. Before the debut though he was secretly groping for the right path to choose.
Honestly when I heard about my debut it felt like it wasn't really happening to me. I entered the agency on the 21th January 2001, my story as a Junior was short, not more than just 2 years and half. I was just about to understand what it means to be a Johnny's. It felt like it was a club activity or some class you take after school. Moreover I hadn't yet decided that that was the job of my life. Inside of me I decided to quit JE if I couldn't debut before turning 20. I thought I couldn't do this for my whole life, I got myself ready to the possibility of not debuting. I entered the agency during high school, I wasn't really aware of my life, I looked at myself in the shiny world of JE as an outsider. I decided to go to university in the case I wasn't able to debut. Doing that I would have been able to graduate and find a job, moreover I wanted to avenge myself for failing once the entrance exam in high school. I really wanted to enter a good university, I choose and successfully entered Meiji university. Without a debut I would become a normal university student and later search an employment...That's what I thought back then.
NEWS debuted as a 9 members group, two years later they became 6. I think now they can honestly tell their real feelings back then...
I entered university in 2003. I turned 19 one month later. Only one year more to the twenties. I didn't know what to do in that year...and then NEWS' debut was confirmed. I was really surprised. When I knew about the group foundation I thought "Maybe now I can start dreaming about this job!". The option of quitting the agency disappeared, I decided to do my best as idol and university student at the same time. I thought I was lucky because I could enjoy double life and I was ready to start.
Anyway the reality was a little different from my expectations. Yamapi was the center since we were Juniors, me and Shige danced on the back corners. When NEWS debuted it didn't look like I couldn't go on the first raw besides Yamapi. It was hard to fill up that distance... I started my career in JE only 2 years and half before, of course it wasn't enough to stand there. And so I fell back and back. I was desperate trying to reach Yamapi. Even so, I wasn't really worried back then. That world was so pretty, I was being noticed too. The staff told me "You succeeded!" and there was the great voice of support of fans that I never heard before. I finally reached a great stage. Thinking about it now, I wasn't really ready for that. Back then I was simply happy for the debut. I had no worry at all, it was a funny, happy time.
Let's go on seeing what happened in his path after these days of pure joy.
When Uchi left in 2005 it was a huge shock to me. I got really along with Uchi, we were good friends. He's from Kansai and I'm from Tokyo, but we didn't feel any distance between us. We also got to sing together some times, because we were kind of similar. I still think that if he stayed with us until now we would have been able to create something really interesting. Remaining in 6 members the year later was another shock. It was because we were losing members of course, but I also had some shameful thought: "Why?! Why everybody has to leave?!". Back then I couldn't talk like this out loud to anybody. That was our worst time, we talked to each other too little. We were too embarrassed to express our real feelings to each other, we were all still young to open our hearts honestly. We were also too proud. I'm sure some members were restraining themselves, others didn't want to hurt anybody's feelings. When we were Juniors we were all in different groups, honestly, it was difficult to reveal our real selves to each other.
When Koyama turned 25 he was lost once again on what to do. What was the turning point?
My biggest turning point after NEWS became 6 was my 25th birthday. I didn't know anymore what I could do. I began questioning myself "What can Koyama Keiichiro really do?" and the answer was "I have nothing left". Really, I couldn't think of anything. Nothing relevant happened, it was simply a personal critic moment. Maybe I started doubting because the entertainment world had become so vague for me. I seemed to ride the waves but I wasn't doing it for real. What do I want to do as a Johnny's? Who do I want to become? I changed the way to face myself as a person. I created my basis and axis asking myself those questions. Right when I was thinking about what I can do and what I want to do, NEWS were chosen as main personalities in "24hTV". I was lost but somehow I wanted to learn the sign language, I asked a possibility to do it to the show. I studied, learnt the sign language and I was able to communicate with deaf children. The producer of "News Every" saw that and said "It's amazing you can use the sign language! I'm sure you can become a journalist too", so he chose me as newscaster for the show. In my troubled moment I got to challenge something new, I think that everything happened with a perfect timing. I realized that my worries had a meaning. My worries didn't clear up all at once, but I found a path where I could work hard again, a breach opened. I felt like I was finally showing Koyama Keiichiro as an individual person.
But still NEWS were only dragged along by Yamapi and Ryo-chan. I still think to NEWS with them standing on the front. That's why I personally wanted to pay my contribute to NEWS too, I wanted my solo activities to be useful to the group too. Looking at the groups of our senpais too, every one of them had a different personality, I admired groups where every member had his own "field". I wanted to have mine too and I find it in being a newscaster. I decided to do my best in that, to do it with all my might. I'm still studying the sign language too because it's an important thing to me.
The biggest turning point for NEWS was 1 year and half ago. Yamashita and Nishikido withdrew. Koyama was one of the person who lived the backstage of this shocking news.
NEWS lost its members before too, but I always thought that we could go on. That confidence came by the fact that Yamapi and Ryo-chan were there. As long as they're here NEWS will be fine.
And then we suddenly had to face their withdrawal. I think they started feeling vaguely lost while we were still active. The reality is that maybe I should have asked them straightly. But I was also afraid to ask. I talked a lot with Yamapi but I couldn't ask him that.
That day we met in a room of the agency with all our staff. Yamapi spoke first. "I quit" he said. But you know, me, Shige, Massu and Tegoshi should have known it already. "This time has come in the end". We couldn't say a word. I thought to myself "Let's talk about it some more" and "I should have asked him before". Anyway, now I can look back at it and I think that Yamapi's decision was amazing. Being in a group you have a vague idea of your future, it takes a big resolution to decide to abandon that future and challenge a new one by yourself. Of course in that moment I couldn't forgive him though (laughs).
Then a representative of the agency asked "Nishikido, what do you want to do?" and Ryo-chan replied "I quit too, I'll go on with Kanjani8". After all if Ryo-chan didn't quit one group, his schedule would have got too exhausting. But losing two members all at once? It was so sudden I couldn't fully understand, I couldn't understand NEWS as 4 members even later. What could we do? In that moment we were all extremely worried.
Then we four gathered with the staff, we talked about our possible future and somebody suggested us to disband too, almost everybody thought it was impossible to go on. One single person though said "Do your best". I believed in those words and I went to talk to the representative of the agency. I had to move or NEWS would disappear... I said to the staff many and many times "I want NEWS to go on". I kept contacting Shige, Massu and Tegoshi too. I told them "If NEWS disband all our activities will cease too. Let's keep alive the group we built until now. Let's shoulder our history". I talked and talked with each one of them. I think that Massu and Tegoshi were really worried, because they could go on and have success as Tegomass. But that option was very scary. I wanted them to stay with NEWS at all costs. Of course I knew that they loved NEWS too. My only thought was that I didn't want to regret not expressing my feelings to them. I talked a lot with Shige too. He's my companion with my same belief since Juniors days. Shige tried to think coldly but he was scared too. That period was painful, extremely exhausting. I stayed home sitting on my sofa and just crying, I woke up in the morning and I started crying naturally. The days passed and I couldn't understand anything. Thinking about it now, those tears were my fear to lose NEWS. Anyway, I kept thinking that I had to do all the possible. The source of that energy were the fans. I was pushed by all the many voices saying "Please protect NEWS", and I went on.
A deep love for NEWS and fans. The strong resolution come at the end of the suffering. Now everything's clear.
Right at that moment I had many opportunity to visit the places devastated by the earthquake as newscaster. The withdrawal was decided but we still didn't announce it publicly. The victims of the earthquake told me "Please, come again with all NEWS!", "I want to see your concert soon!". Between them somebody even said "When the earthquake began I grabbed my NEWS albums and ran out of home!". But I knew that two members already left. I had to announce such a sad news to people who are our fans and that moreover were living such a painful time...It was so hard. That's when I realized something: "We have to go on with NEWS, even if we're 4 we need to have a concert in the places struck by the earthquake!". The voices of those fans were the first reason that brought us back to life. I started loving the fans' NEWS once again. The day before the public announcement I talked with "News Every"'s producer. I told him "Tomorrow I'm going to be in the news. We don't know yet what will happen to NEWS. Can I still work in the show?". I was working there because I'm "NEWS' Koyama Keiichiro"...that's what I've always thought. Then, the producer replied "I didn't hire a NEWS' member. I chose Koyama Keiichiro as human being, nothing will change to my decision after tomorrow's announcement". I was so happy. I realized I'm working with such good people full of love. Thanks to those words my attachment to NEWS grew even stronger. The kind words by many people became my support.
But still nothing was decided for NEWS' future. Tegomass were having their tour so we decided to talk all together at its end. I wanted them to focus properly on their tour. Tegomass were giving courage and positive energy to the fans in their shiny world, I thought it was wrong to be all gloomy and ask for NEWS at that moment.
During Tegomass tour I heard about their concerts in different places, the additional stages, etc. I was happy Tegomass were doing so great but I was also nervous, thinking that the possibilities for NEWS were growing thinner. Anyway I went to watch Tegomass' live. There they sang "Sakura Girl" and I started crying. I realized that our love for NEWS was the same after all. I decided to believe in them.
A new beginning was decided. Koyama became the group leader, the dreams for the future of NEWS...
After the end of Tegomass' tour we gathered again to talk, we decided to take it easy and try to satisfy each member. Then I said: "If we let this finish here it's only because of our egos. Please, listen more carefully to the fans". NEWS was left with only 4 members, but also with many fans who decided to stay. We lost members but I felt like we gained one more. Because fans became one member of NEWS. Right now I really feel like our members increased (laughs).
No other group in JE experienced something like this. We lost members, we were asked to disband, but still we went on...It never happened before. After this nothing can scare us anymore. We have nothing left to lose. We restarted, we released "Chankapaana" and "World Quest", NEWS' history is growing up little by little. Recently I got to talk about NEWS with people I don't know and I heard them say often "Is it the 4 members group?". This makes me really happy. NEWS is getting known as a 4 members group, I'm glad.
I think that from now on it's important to raise our personal abilities and to use them to help the group. Being in 4 we can't deceive anybody. I feel our individuality is more exposed now. That's why I think it's essential to nurture these individualities.
A last thing I want to express are my feelings of thankfulness towards Yamapi and Ryo-chan. They're obviously the foundations on which NEWS was created, NEWS grew up thanks to them too. Our activities with 6 people gave us the opportunity to have a brand new start in 4. I never hated them. Even though sometimes I couldn't forgive them (laughs). Sometimes I couldn't stand watching their new works too. But now I can observe them work hard again. Because I understood that we have allies. Around us we have so many supporters...I finally realized this and now I'm fine.
Right now I wish for the happiness of all the original NEWS members, included Yamapi and Ryo-chan. I want us to be happy, become old men and laugh about the past all together. Like "We lost too many members!" (laughs). It would be real happiness if we'll be able to talk like "Back then I was thinking like that" or "It was a real hard time back then".
We won't lose. We will never lose. We could preserve NEWS and we will make the fans happy! We made them cry and be sad a lot. From now on I want to make NEWS fans happier than any other fan. Take care of us. Let's create new memories together.
[Even if we all know and heard their personal stories so many times it's always nice to read them once again, with the years the details increase too. The debut part was adorable, it's cute that Koyama tried to compete with Yamapi and the other main members while being all cheerful. I'm a little sad that after so many years they still cannot mention properly Kusano, anyway I was moved by Koyama's words about Uchi. The moment he talked about its hidden thoughts back then, and what he said later, made me realize a point of view I never considered...that after all JE groups are made of boys/men. And as such they are too proud and embarrassed to talk heart to heart about their feelings as girls would do. I guess many issues they had came from that too, as Koyama said.
It's always painful to read about the withdrawal of Yamapi and Ryo, this time he gave us some report of their meeting and it felt so real. I'm sorry Koyama felt somehow "responsible" because he didn't have the courage to face Yamapi and Ryo directly before it was too late...It's great to feel his resolution and confidence now that everything passed though. I'm thankful for his nice words to fans and to RyoPi, I had times in which I couldn't forgive them too, we all did/do, so I can understand well.]
This interview is pretty long but it's totally worth reading, both for old NEWS fans and new ones. I know that many of you didn't know NEWS when they were 9-8-or 6 so it's a good way to have an idea of everything that happened in the group's history.
Enjoy and prepare the tissues! ♥