Random acts of life
I was at the birth of a baby yesterday who turned out to have a partially cleft lip and cleft palate and some extra digits on both hands. This is not the first time a baby has had a "defect" of some kind, of course, and it isn't likely to be the last. What is interesting is how little it means to most parents, when they don't find out until after the baby is born. In my profession I see women going to extraordinary lengths to make sure "every thing is alright with the baby", including procedures like amniocentesis that carry a risk of actually killing a baby who may be perfectly normal. We are all so afraid of oddity, something unusual, our child being exceptional in the wrong sense of the word.
And yet....the parents didn't even notice the notch taken from the baby's upper lip for the first ten minutes - not until I had already taken the baby and looked in her mouth to see that indeed, the palate was involved. Even then, I had to tell them, they didn't see it themselves. And while it is hard for me, who sees so many babies, to see a cleft lip as any big deal, I can understand how disturbing it looks to others. But one mother a few months back who's baby had a cleft lip (but not palate) told me she wasn't looking forward to his surgical repair because she was so used to the little defect, she thought it was cute, it just looked like him.
So does love really conquer all?
Last night I had one of those horrible nights when you lay awake, worrying about things that will probably never happen. It occurred to me that if I couldn't work, we only have enough money to last about 2 months. And if I die, I have no life insurance so my family would suffer dreadfully. I resolved to fix this situation immediately. I don't think I'm going to die anytime soon; but how irresponsible is that, to be a parent and not provide for your kids if you get hit by the proverbial bus?
This weekend is the stupid office picnic - which for some reason I am really dreading this year. For one thing, the weather has been awful, so a day outside isn't exactly appealing. And for another, it's not my on-call weekend, so I kinda resent having to spend a day off with all the people I work with, schmoozing with clients. Even though I like a lot of them, it's still work. Maybe I will let my kids off the hook this year; usually I force them to attend because everyone wants me to produce the fabled 6 kids for this event. But with Jennifer out of reach, we are reduced to 5. And though I could put emotional leverage on Riley, I don't really want to. Alice and Maddie are still fully within my range of authority, but sulking teenagers are not going to impress anyone. Ken and Trav would still be young enough to not mind going. Perhaps Maddie, since there will be babies.
I am starting the countdown to my next time off - 8 weeks. It's really nice because right after I get back from my week in Vegas Jen finishes her semester, and hopefully will arrive while I am still off work.
And yet....the parents didn't even notice the notch taken from the baby's upper lip for the first ten minutes - not until I had already taken the baby and looked in her mouth to see that indeed, the palate was involved. Even then, I had to tell them, they didn't see it themselves. And while it is hard for me, who sees so many babies, to see a cleft lip as any big deal, I can understand how disturbing it looks to others. But one mother a few months back who's baby had a cleft lip (but not palate) told me she wasn't looking forward to his surgical repair because she was so used to the little defect, she thought it was cute, it just looked like him.
So does love really conquer all?
Last night I had one of those horrible nights when you lay awake, worrying about things that will probably never happen. It occurred to me that if I couldn't work, we only have enough money to last about 2 months. And if I die, I have no life insurance so my family would suffer dreadfully. I resolved to fix this situation immediately. I don't think I'm going to die anytime soon; but how irresponsible is that, to be a parent and not provide for your kids if you get hit by the proverbial bus?
This weekend is the stupid office picnic - which for some reason I am really dreading this year. For one thing, the weather has been awful, so a day outside isn't exactly appealing. And for another, it's not my on-call weekend, so I kinda resent having to spend a day off with all the people I work with, schmoozing with clients. Even though I like a lot of them, it's still work. Maybe I will let my kids off the hook this year; usually I force them to attend because everyone wants me to produce the fabled 6 kids for this event. But with Jennifer out of reach, we are reduced to 5. And though I could put emotional leverage on Riley, I don't really want to. Alice and Maddie are still fully within my range of authority, but sulking teenagers are not going to impress anyone. Ken and Trav would still be young enough to not mind going. Perhaps Maddie, since there will be babies.
I am starting the countdown to my next time off - 8 weeks. It's really nice because right after I get back from my week in Vegas Jen finishes her semester, and hopefully will arrive while I am still off work.