We Can Be Heroes...
It was too easy for them to find time to be together. The fact that Hankyung and Heechul worked together on the performance gave them perfect opportunities to sneak and see each other. Each day passed by with more excuses and more viable reasons to be alone together. Falling deeper in love by the moment, Heechul and Hankyung both began to find it difficult to stop staring at one another with priceless looks of smitten love on their faces. It was starting to get noticed and so Heechul had warned Hankyung many times to stop staring at him during practice. It wasn’t his fault Heechul wore outfits that taunted him with their tight material in just the right places. Hankyung shook his head to rid himself of the many images that were starting to creep up on him. That could be dealt with later.
Hankyung looked over at Heechul, he was sitting next to the Duke, as always, but he slowly glanced over and smiled. It was their signal; finally it was time for Hankyung to lie really badly and pull Heechul away from the Duke. Siwon, however, was so deeply infatuated with Heechul it didn’t matter how corny the lie was, and Hankyung stepped up behind both of their seats. Heechul smiled a polite smile at him as he walked up, making the Duke acknowledge Hankyung’s presence for once instead of staring only at Heechul.
“I’m so sorry to interrupt,” Hankyung said, adding just enough of regret in his voice to be convincing. The truth was Hankyung’s skin was humming with anticipation, being so close to Heechul did that to him. “Heechul, I must ask your advice on this one piece I’m working on. It involves your character, and I thought that you would be able to help.”
Heechul smiled and lifted his eyes to look in Hankyung’s. “Of course I’ll help you with the scene.”
Hankyung smiled and Siwon shifted in his seat. “But, we were going to go eat later on.”
Hankyung frowned down at the Duke. “Well, I will understand if you aren’t able to, Heechul.”
Heechul stood up abruptly. “I’m sorry dear Siwon but this is a little more important than a small lunch date.”
Siwon quickly stood up next to Heechul. “Oh, yes of course. Maybe some other time then, my blossom.” Siwon smiled, solely looking at Heechul. Heechul gazed in Siwon’s eyes and smiled back at him. Hankyung felt a tug on his heart but pushed away the feeling. It was only acting after all.
Later that night Heechul met Hankyung in his small apartment room. The lights were dim and Hankyung swallowed as Heechul walked through the door. He was dressed in a shirt that barely buttoned up to the middle of his chest and tightly fitted black jeans that hugged his hips and allowed not much of anything to the imagination. Heechul smiled at Hankyung, a small twinkle of mischief in his eyes as he saw Hankyung’s gaze. “I’m sorry, I had to change clothes. After Siwon hanging all over me all day long, I felt dirty.” Heechul shivered and moved closer to Hankyung, running his hands down his arm and weaving his fingers in Hankyung’s, pulling him closer.
When they met it was always the same. Heechul would complain about Siwon, Hankyung would wrap him in his arms, promising to never treat him like that, and Heechul would lift his trusting eyes to Hankyung’s and they would kiss slowly. Every part of Hankyung loved this man. Heechul was like the air he breathed, he couldn’t go too long without him, and if he did he missed Heechul with his whole body. Heechul desperately clung to Hankyung after the deep kiss was over. “Please, Hankyung, I want someone to love me like a person is supposed to be loved. I’ve never known the feeling, please Hankyung.”
The perfect sorrow in Heechul’s eyes made Hankyung quickly pull him through his apartment to his room. “I don’t know what to do, Heechul you drive me crazy. It’s not just the way you dress, the way you are totally shameless in some situations. It’s the fact that you are so inexperienced in relationships and love. The fact that you control everything and nothing at all and also because you never show me something you’re not like you do with everyone else. I love you, Kim Heechul. Are you sure this is what you want?”
Heechul stared at him. Hankyung was asking him this? No one had ever asked him, they usually threw him on the bed and had their way with him. Heechul felt tears fill his eyes. Damn it, Hankyung always made him cry. He promised he’d never do that, didn’t he?
Heechul knew, however, he wasn’t crying because of sadness. He loved Hankyung more than anything in this world. If Heechul was imprudent he could say that they were soul mates the way they fit together like two puzzle pieces. He smiled slowly at Hankyung. “Hankyung, I love you too. I’m ready.” It was the most hypocritical statement. Of course he had already done this before. For once in his many years of having men treat him like nothing but a toy, however, it felt like the first time to him.
Hankyung slowly reached for the buttons on Heechul’s shirt and carefully pulled them open, removing his shirt from his shoulders and causing Heechul to shiver at the feeling of Hankyung’s soft hands over his skin, and he moved closer to pull Hankyung’s shirt over his head. Hankyung stared at Heechul, still unsure whether he should do this or not. It wasn’t like he didn’t want to, but he was still trying to prove to Heechul that he wasn’t one of his many clients. Heechul wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled their hips closer together, grinding on him and causing Hankyung to gasp. “I am ready, just kiss me already.”
Heechul smiled as he brought Hankyung’s sweet lips down for a kiss. His kisses were never like the others, even in the heat of this moment. They were always gentle and loving and Heechul smiled into Hankyung’s lips. He broke the kiss when breathing was starting to become difficult and traced light kisses down his jaw to his neck where he lightly nibbled at the tender skin. Hankyung pulled him closer, his breathing becoming heavy and Heechul smiled again. Hankyung reached for his pants and Heechul slapped his hands away. “Not yet.” He mumbled and smiled at Hankyung’s adorable pout. He took his lips again in a deep kiss that made them both forget all that was around them. They were the only two in the world at that moment.
“Heechul, please stop teasing me,” Hankyung was whining now and Heechul let out a small chuckle, reaching slowly to undo Hankyung’s pants.
“You’re such a party pooper.” It was his turn to pout and Hankyung slowly pulled him closer and trailed kisses down his neck, nipping and biting his way until Heechul could hardly breathe. “Oh, Hankyung!”
Hankyung suddenly stopped and stepped away. “Now you see? It’s really terrible.” He smirked at Heechul. Heechul rolled his eyes but quickly moved himself closer to the bed and started to strip slowly, only for the obvious interest of Hankyung, undoing his pants and slowly slipping them down his legs. Hankyung quickly grabbed him, and soon they were both naked on the soft blankets of the bed. Heechul felt the soft fabric on his back and Hankyung’s hands caressing every part of him. He sighed and arched back and Hankyung’s lips touched just the right place and heard him moan when their bodies touched. Heechul smiled and ran his hands down Hankyung’s smooth chest liking how his body reacted to his touch. “Love me, darling, that’s all I ask of you…” Heechul breathed in his ear and kissed Hankyung. This was the last thought Heechul was able to make for Hankyung started to use his hands for something totally different than writing manuscripts, and Heechul was completely satisfied with that too.
* * *
They were both at complete peace now, resting next to one another. Heechul had his head on Hankyung’s chest and they both had their eyes closed. Heechul had never done this before. It was usually sex and then goodbyes. Cuddling was turning into Heechul’s favorite hobby now. “This has to be love.” Hankyung’s whisper made Heechul smile.
“Why do you say that?” Heechul kissed Hankyung’s chest.
“Because passion brings a tremble to your lips…it makes you long for that person with your body, and it is satisfied with a kiss…” Hankyung kissed the top of Heechul’s head. “But love…love stirs your heartstrings…”
Heechul felt like the smile would never be erased from his face and they both fell asleep in each other’s arms.
The next morning Heechul hurried out of Hankyung’s apartment, kissing him passionately on the lips and promising to see him later. They were to practice again and Heechul had to sneak back into his room before the Duke knocked on his door. Heechul had purposefully left the window cracked so he could just slide it open. He was surprisingly sneaky when he wanted to be and soon he was up in his room and changed. There was a knock on the door and Heechul glanced at the mirror to fix his hair. His cheeks had a pink hue that had never been there before and his eyes were filled with a light that Heechul almost laughed at seeing. ‘So, I guess this is what love does to you…” He liked it a little too much.
When he pulled open the door he was surprised to find, not the Duke, but Eeteuk standing outside of it. “Heechul, you have a slight problem. Oh, but before I go into that, um the Duke was terribly sorry he couldn’t meet you today, but he’d be at the practice.” That was Eeteuk for you; he never wanted to drop bad news on Heechul if he could help it. Heechul’s heart jumpstarted and he frantically pulled Eeteuk in his room.
“What’s the bad news, Eeteuk? I really don’t care if Siwon comes to get me or not. It gives me a few hours to breathe.” Heechul grabbed Eeteuk’s shoulders. “Tell me please.”
Eeteuk looked at Heechul for a second then dropped his eyes to the ground. “There are whispers all over the place that you and the writer are seeing each other. I’ve tried to ignore them, but apparently they keep getting louder by the minute. If you want to get out of here, you have to push the writer away. Siwon is your only chance.”
Heechul stood, stunned for a few seconds, then laughed. “Eeteuk, me…with the writer? That’s silly! You can’t possibly believe that.”
Eeteuk glared at Heechul and it was his turn to grab Heechul by the shoulders. “I’m not an idiot. You weren’t in your room last night, and you weren’t with the Duke. Don’t take me for a fool. Break it off before the Duke finds out.”
Heechul stared at Eeteuk, sadness filling his eyes. “But Eeteuk…I love him.”
Eeteuk froze, his hands dropping from Heechul’s shoulders and his eyes started to tear up. “You have to break it off, you have to get out of here.”
Heechul turned his back on Eeteuk. “I’m not like you. I’m not going to sacrifice my love. I’ll figure out a way.
Heechul walked out of the room leaving Eeteuk behind. Eeteuk felt the tears of hurt and sadness fall out of his eyes, running down his cheeks. Love had no place here, love had never fit in The Golden Tavern, but maybe Heechul would find a way. Eeteuk calmly wiped the tears from his eyes. Maybe Heechul could find another way out of this hell that Eeteuk had involuntarily made for him.
Heechul had to take a deep breath to calm himself before he stepped in the open. Siwon was waiting for him and he plastered on a convincing fake smile. “Hello my dear, I hope you slept well tonight.” Oh, wouldn’t he like to know. Heechul slept incredibly well.
“Yes, I did. I hope you did too.” Heechul smiled and Siwon grabbed his hand, bringing it slowly to his lips.
“I dreamt of you, of course it was a good night.” Heechul, instead of shivering in disgust like he wanted, giggled like a schoolgirl.
Hankyung moved quickly next to Heechul and Heechul blinked at him in surprise. Of course he was incredibly happy to see him. A warm feeling crept from his stomach to the tips of his fingers but Heechul kept his face a soft smile when he asked, “Yes, Hankyung, what do you need?”
Hankyung smiled at Heechul, his acting had improved and Heechul was happy that he didn’t have to do something drastic…like stomping on Hankyung’s foot or something. It took him a moment to register that Donghae was beside him and Heechul greeted both of them. “Well, I’m not quite sure I have this scene written correctly. Donghae is trying to help me, but it doesn’t seem to be right.”
Heechul smiled and Siwon glanced between the both, a look of annoyance on his face. “Heechul, you agreed to eat dinner with me tonight.”
Heechul smiled at his audience. There was something in the air that told him Hankyung had purposefully come over here to see which person he would choose. “I’m sorry Duke, I know I promised but this play seems to be more and more difficult to work out. The writer and I don’t know each other very well and so he has a little difficulty writing the character I will be portraying. Please do understand.”
Siwon looked a Heechul with disappointment. “I set up everything already.”
“I’m sorry Siwon, but I must decline.” Heechul turned away from the smug expression on Hankyung’s face. Why did he need for Heechul to prove anything anymore? He would always choose Hankyung, no matter who was standing before him.
Heechul walked up to the balcony and smiled when he heard footsteps behind him. Hankyung had followed him. “I don’t know why you needed proof. I’ll always choose you.”
Hankyung chuckled; he had already wrapped his arms around Heechul’s waist, and the feel of Hankyung’s breath against his skin made Heechul shiver. “When will we meet tonight?”
“I will come after I change out of this.” Heechul stared down at his outfit, he didn’t like it very much-the Duke had bought it for him.
Hankyung pulled Heechul behind one of the supports on the balcony and pressed Heechul’s back up against it. “I’m sorry, I can’t help myself anymore. I’ve wanted to kiss you ever since you walked through the door.”
Heechul smiled and they kissed, the fire that shot through both of them took their breath away and Heechul had to break the kiss quickly. If he didn’t he would have to throw Hankyung down and…well his imagination was thinking dirty thoughts. “We’ll meet tonight.” Heechul’s breath was heavy and Hankyung grinned, kissing Heechul on the forehead before he left the balcony. Heechul watched after him before someone roughly grabbed his arm and spun him around.
“Heechul, what the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Kangin’s angry voice made Heechul put a hand to his mouth.
“What do you mean, I’m not doing anything.” Heechul masked the shaking of his voice; years of pretending had made him a master at lying.
Kangin raised his hand and Heechul flinched a little. “Don’t you dare lie to me! I saw both of you!” Heechul’s eyes were wide and he felt tears fill them. “You better be glad I was the only one. The Duke almost saw. Do you know what would happen to all of us if he were to find out?”
“Oh, Kangin you’re being silly…it’s just a fling. Nothing serious.” Heechul’s knees felt weak but he smiled at Kangin.
“This has to end, fling or not. The Duke holds the deeds to this place. You’re putting all of us in danger. You are not to meet with the writer again.” Kangin abruptly let go of his arm and turned to walk away. “You will meet the Duke tonight and have dinner with him. Do you understand?”
Heechul nodded slowly, tears that had filled his eyes began to fall. His knees quickly gave out and he slumped to the ground. What was he going to do? The Duke holds the deeds to his life, Hankyung held the deeds to his heart. Heechul was not going to sit here and feel bad for himself, but the tears kept flowing even after he had picked himself up from the ground. He walked down the stairs and slowly out the side door to his dressing room; the new one Siwon had given him. The outfit was already picked out for the dinner that evening with Siwon and when Heechul saw it there was a catch in his throat. He started to cough and slowly looked at himself in the mirror that was hung up on the wall. There was nothing resembling the man of this morning, the one that had the light in his eyes, the glow in his cheeks. All Heechul saw was a pale and fragile man in the mirror. The coughs didn’t stop and Heechul put his hand up to his lips, the coughs sent violent and painful shocks through his chest, his whole body shuddering with each cough. When he pulled his hand back there was blood coating it and Heechul stared at it with shock, the coughs wouldn’t stop and he couldn’t breath. “Oh God, oh God.” A hoarse whisper burst from his throat as he felt himself sink under into the dim realm of unconsciousness.
Two men sat alone waiting for Heechul to meet them that night. One held the promises of love in his hands, the other with passion so strong that it set his body on fire and denied him common sense and rationality. As the Duke was ready to send Kyuhyun to search for Kangin, Kangin burst through the doors. “Heechul…is…well he’s…at the church.”
“The church.” The Duke sneered. He didn’t like that Kangin was spitting upon religion. Heechul was most definitely not confessing any of his sins. It would take months and Siwon didn’t have the patience. “Do you take me as a fool?”
“No of course not, but it’s true! Heechul said he wanted to be clean and pure for his first night with you.” Kangin smiled at him and the Duke felt a stirring in his heart.
“Heechul wont be coming tonight?”
Kangin shook his head, glancing guiltily at the untouched, cold food laid out on the table. “I’m terribly sorry, dear Duke. He won’t be attending tonight.”
Siwon slammed a hand on the table. He selfishly wanted Heechul tonight whether he was at the church or not. There was certainly nothing he could do about it though, so as he watched Kangin’s retreating figure he picked up his fork and started to eat.
Hankyung waited up until the first light of morning touched the clouds of the sky. He felt tears sting his eyes. Why hadn’t Heechul come tonight? Donghae had fallen asleep on the couch and suddenly woke up with a jolt. “Hankyung, did Heechul ever arrive?”
Hankyung shook his head and Donghae didn’t pry anymore. He saw the hurt in Hankyung’s eyes so he didn’t push the subject; he just reached and squeezed his hand. “I’m sure it’s nothing to be upset about.” Donghae smiled a reassuring smile and walked through the door that Heechul, that night, never entered.
The doctor stood next to Heechul’s bed and Eeteuk scanned his eyes as he held Heechul’s hand. Tears were falling down his face as he saw the doctor shake his head. “Don’t just stand there beside me, silently shaking your head. What’s wrong with him?”
The doctor filled a syringe with clear liquid, pushing it into Heechul’s arm and then turned to Eeteuk. “This will help him sleep tonight. He’ll feel weak in the morning but he should be able to continue what he is doing for a little while longer.”
Eeteuk angrily grabbed the doctor’s arms and shook him. “What is wrong with him? What is wrong with my Heechul?”
The doctor looked down at the floor. “It isn’t good. He has consumption…it’s in the later stages. There is nothing I can do…”
Eeteuk let his arms fall from the doctor’s shoulders. It felt like all the air had been sucked from his body. This couldn’t be happening, not to Heechul, he had more life in him than anyone Eeteuk knew. Eeteuk fell to his knees; his tears starting to fall and he buried his face in his hands. “No, no, no, no.” He didn’t know how many times he repeated these words but suddenly he felt arms around him and Kangin’s voice.
“How long does he have?”
The doctor paused for a long moment before answering. “A couple of months at the most. His lungs are already starting to deteriorate.”
Eeteuk sobbed harder at those words. “My baby, my poor baby.”
Kangin rubbed his back and Eeteuk heard his voice shake as he said. “Don’t let him know, you can’t let him know. His spirit will leave him if he finds out he’s dying.”
Eeteuk dropped his hands from his face, turning to gaze at Heechul’s pale and sweat covered face. He couldn’t save Heechul from his fate. He was now too far to reach, the fingers of death had pulled him away and Eeteuk felt helpless, vulnerable and he turned his eyes to Kangin, nodding. “I can’t tell him.” Eeteuk felt a piece of his heart slowly chip away and he started to sob again.
A/N: I'm sorry. I'm really sorry *goes off to cry*
Hankyung looked over at Heechul, he was sitting next to the Duke, as always, but he slowly glanced over and smiled. It was their signal; finally it was time for Hankyung to lie really badly and pull Heechul away from the Duke. Siwon, however, was so deeply infatuated with Heechul it didn’t matter how corny the lie was, and Hankyung stepped up behind both of their seats. Heechul smiled a polite smile at him as he walked up, making the Duke acknowledge Hankyung’s presence for once instead of staring only at Heechul.
“I’m so sorry to interrupt,” Hankyung said, adding just enough of regret in his voice to be convincing. The truth was Hankyung’s skin was humming with anticipation, being so close to Heechul did that to him. “Heechul, I must ask your advice on this one piece I’m working on. It involves your character, and I thought that you would be able to help.”
Heechul smiled and lifted his eyes to look in Hankyung’s. “Of course I’ll help you with the scene.”
Hankyung smiled and Siwon shifted in his seat. “But, we were going to go eat later on.”
Hankyung frowned down at the Duke. “Well, I will understand if you aren’t able to, Heechul.”
Heechul stood up abruptly. “I’m sorry dear Siwon but this is a little more important than a small lunch date.”
Siwon quickly stood up next to Heechul. “Oh, yes of course. Maybe some other time then, my blossom.” Siwon smiled, solely looking at Heechul. Heechul gazed in Siwon’s eyes and smiled back at him. Hankyung felt a tug on his heart but pushed away the feeling. It was only acting after all.
Later that night Heechul met Hankyung in his small apartment room. The lights were dim and Hankyung swallowed as Heechul walked through the door. He was dressed in a shirt that barely buttoned up to the middle of his chest and tightly fitted black jeans that hugged his hips and allowed not much of anything to the imagination. Heechul smiled at Hankyung, a small twinkle of mischief in his eyes as he saw Hankyung’s gaze. “I’m sorry, I had to change clothes. After Siwon hanging all over me all day long, I felt dirty.” Heechul shivered and moved closer to Hankyung, running his hands down his arm and weaving his fingers in Hankyung’s, pulling him closer.
When they met it was always the same. Heechul would complain about Siwon, Hankyung would wrap him in his arms, promising to never treat him like that, and Heechul would lift his trusting eyes to Hankyung’s and they would kiss slowly. Every part of Hankyung loved this man. Heechul was like the air he breathed, he couldn’t go too long without him, and if he did he missed Heechul with his whole body. Heechul desperately clung to Hankyung after the deep kiss was over. “Please, Hankyung, I want someone to love me like a person is supposed to be loved. I’ve never known the feeling, please Hankyung.”
The perfect sorrow in Heechul’s eyes made Hankyung quickly pull him through his apartment to his room. “I don’t know what to do, Heechul you drive me crazy. It’s not just the way you dress, the way you are totally shameless in some situations. It’s the fact that you are so inexperienced in relationships and love. The fact that you control everything and nothing at all and also because you never show me something you’re not like you do with everyone else. I love you, Kim Heechul. Are you sure this is what you want?”
Heechul stared at him. Hankyung was asking him this? No one had ever asked him, they usually threw him on the bed and had their way with him. Heechul felt tears fill his eyes. Damn it, Hankyung always made him cry. He promised he’d never do that, didn’t he?
Heechul knew, however, he wasn’t crying because of sadness. He loved Hankyung more than anything in this world. If Heechul was imprudent he could say that they were soul mates the way they fit together like two puzzle pieces. He smiled slowly at Hankyung. “Hankyung, I love you too. I’m ready.” It was the most hypocritical statement. Of course he had already done this before. For once in his many years of having men treat him like nothing but a toy, however, it felt like the first time to him.
Hankyung slowly reached for the buttons on Heechul’s shirt and carefully pulled them open, removing his shirt from his shoulders and causing Heechul to shiver at the feeling of Hankyung’s soft hands over his skin, and he moved closer to pull Hankyung’s shirt over his head. Hankyung stared at Heechul, still unsure whether he should do this or not. It wasn’t like he didn’t want to, but he was still trying to prove to Heechul that he wasn’t one of his many clients. Heechul wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled their hips closer together, grinding on him and causing Hankyung to gasp. “I am ready, just kiss me already.”
Heechul smiled as he brought Hankyung’s sweet lips down for a kiss. His kisses were never like the others, even in the heat of this moment. They were always gentle and loving and Heechul smiled into Hankyung’s lips. He broke the kiss when breathing was starting to become difficult and traced light kisses down his jaw to his neck where he lightly nibbled at the tender skin. Hankyung pulled him closer, his breathing becoming heavy and Heechul smiled again. Hankyung reached for his pants and Heechul slapped his hands away. “Not yet.” He mumbled and smiled at Hankyung’s adorable pout. He took his lips again in a deep kiss that made them both forget all that was around them. They were the only two in the world at that moment.
“Heechul, please stop teasing me,” Hankyung was whining now and Heechul let out a small chuckle, reaching slowly to undo Hankyung’s pants.
“You’re such a party pooper.” It was his turn to pout and Hankyung slowly pulled him closer and trailed kisses down his neck, nipping and biting his way until Heechul could hardly breathe. “Oh, Hankyung!”
Hankyung suddenly stopped and stepped away. “Now you see? It’s really terrible.” He smirked at Heechul. Heechul rolled his eyes but quickly moved himself closer to the bed and started to strip slowly, only for the obvious interest of Hankyung, undoing his pants and slowly slipping them down his legs. Hankyung quickly grabbed him, and soon they were both naked on the soft blankets of the bed. Heechul felt the soft fabric on his back and Hankyung’s hands caressing every part of him. He sighed and arched back and Hankyung’s lips touched just the right place and heard him moan when their bodies touched. Heechul smiled and ran his hands down Hankyung’s smooth chest liking how his body reacted to his touch. “Love me, darling, that’s all I ask of you…” Heechul breathed in his ear and kissed Hankyung. This was the last thought Heechul was able to make for Hankyung started to use his hands for something totally different than writing manuscripts, and Heechul was completely satisfied with that too.
* * *
They were both at complete peace now, resting next to one another. Heechul had his head on Hankyung’s chest and they both had their eyes closed. Heechul had never done this before. It was usually sex and then goodbyes. Cuddling was turning into Heechul’s favorite hobby now. “This has to be love.” Hankyung’s whisper made Heechul smile.
“Why do you say that?” Heechul kissed Hankyung’s chest.
“Because passion brings a tremble to your lips…it makes you long for that person with your body, and it is satisfied with a kiss…” Hankyung kissed the top of Heechul’s head. “But love…love stirs your heartstrings…”
Heechul felt like the smile would never be erased from his face and they both fell asleep in each other’s arms.
The next morning Heechul hurried out of Hankyung’s apartment, kissing him passionately on the lips and promising to see him later. They were to practice again and Heechul had to sneak back into his room before the Duke knocked on his door. Heechul had purposefully left the window cracked so he could just slide it open. He was surprisingly sneaky when he wanted to be and soon he was up in his room and changed. There was a knock on the door and Heechul glanced at the mirror to fix his hair. His cheeks had a pink hue that had never been there before and his eyes were filled with a light that Heechul almost laughed at seeing. ‘So, I guess this is what love does to you…” He liked it a little too much.
When he pulled open the door he was surprised to find, not the Duke, but Eeteuk standing outside of it. “Heechul, you have a slight problem. Oh, but before I go into that, um the Duke was terribly sorry he couldn’t meet you today, but he’d be at the practice.” That was Eeteuk for you; he never wanted to drop bad news on Heechul if he could help it. Heechul’s heart jumpstarted and he frantically pulled Eeteuk in his room.
“What’s the bad news, Eeteuk? I really don’t care if Siwon comes to get me or not. It gives me a few hours to breathe.” Heechul grabbed Eeteuk’s shoulders. “Tell me please.”
Eeteuk looked at Heechul for a second then dropped his eyes to the ground. “There are whispers all over the place that you and the writer are seeing each other. I’ve tried to ignore them, but apparently they keep getting louder by the minute. If you want to get out of here, you have to push the writer away. Siwon is your only chance.”
Heechul stood, stunned for a few seconds, then laughed. “Eeteuk, me…with the writer? That’s silly! You can’t possibly believe that.”
Eeteuk glared at Heechul and it was his turn to grab Heechul by the shoulders. “I’m not an idiot. You weren’t in your room last night, and you weren’t with the Duke. Don’t take me for a fool. Break it off before the Duke finds out.”
Heechul stared at Eeteuk, sadness filling his eyes. “But Eeteuk…I love him.”
Eeteuk froze, his hands dropping from Heechul’s shoulders and his eyes started to tear up. “You have to break it off, you have to get out of here.”
Heechul turned his back on Eeteuk. “I’m not like you. I’m not going to sacrifice my love. I’ll figure out a way.
Heechul walked out of the room leaving Eeteuk behind. Eeteuk felt the tears of hurt and sadness fall out of his eyes, running down his cheeks. Love had no place here, love had never fit in The Golden Tavern, but maybe Heechul would find a way. Eeteuk calmly wiped the tears from his eyes. Maybe Heechul could find another way out of this hell that Eeteuk had involuntarily made for him.
Heechul had to take a deep breath to calm himself before he stepped in the open. Siwon was waiting for him and he plastered on a convincing fake smile. “Hello my dear, I hope you slept well tonight.” Oh, wouldn’t he like to know. Heechul slept incredibly well.
“Yes, I did. I hope you did too.” Heechul smiled and Siwon grabbed his hand, bringing it slowly to his lips.
“I dreamt of you, of course it was a good night.” Heechul, instead of shivering in disgust like he wanted, giggled like a schoolgirl.
Hankyung moved quickly next to Heechul and Heechul blinked at him in surprise. Of course he was incredibly happy to see him. A warm feeling crept from his stomach to the tips of his fingers but Heechul kept his face a soft smile when he asked, “Yes, Hankyung, what do you need?”
Hankyung smiled at Heechul, his acting had improved and Heechul was happy that he didn’t have to do something drastic…like stomping on Hankyung’s foot or something. It took him a moment to register that Donghae was beside him and Heechul greeted both of them. “Well, I’m not quite sure I have this scene written correctly. Donghae is trying to help me, but it doesn’t seem to be right.”
Heechul smiled and Siwon glanced between the both, a look of annoyance on his face. “Heechul, you agreed to eat dinner with me tonight.”
Heechul smiled at his audience. There was something in the air that told him Hankyung had purposefully come over here to see which person he would choose. “I’m sorry Duke, I know I promised but this play seems to be more and more difficult to work out. The writer and I don’t know each other very well and so he has a little difficulty writing the character I will be portraying. Please do understand.”
Siwon looked a Heechul with disappointment. “I set up everything already.”
“I’m sorry Siwon, but I must decline.” Heechul turned away from the smug expression on Hankyung’s face. Why did he need for Heechul to prove anything anymore? He would always choose Hankyung, no matter who was standing before him.
Heechul walked up to the balcony and smiled when he heard footsteps behind him. Hankyung had followed him. “I don’t know why you needed proof. I’ll always choose you.”
Hankyung chuckled; he had already wrapped his arms around Heechul’s waist, and the feel of Hankyung’s breath against his skin made Heechul shiver. “When will we meet tonight?”
“I will come after I change out of this.” Heechul stared down at his outfit, he didn’t like it very much-the Duke had bought it for him.
Hankyung pulled Heechul behind one of the supports on the balcony and pressed Heechul’s back up against it. “I’m sorry, I can’t help myself anymore. I’ve wanted to kiss you ever since you walked through the door.”
Heechul smiled and they kissed, the fire that shot through both of them took their breath away and Heechul had to break the kiss quickly. If he didn’t he would have to throw Hankyung down and…well his imagination was thinking dirty thoughts. “We’ll meet tonight.” Heechul’s breath was heavy and Hankyung grinned, kissing Heechul on the forehead before he left the balcony. Heechul watched after him before someone roughly grabbed his arm and spun him around.
“Heechul, what the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Kangin’s angry voice made Heechul put a hand to his mouth.
“What do you mean, I’m not doing anything.” Heechul masked the shaking of his voice; years of pretending had made him a master at lying.
Kangin raised his hand and Heechul flinched a little. “Don’t you dare lie to me! I saw both of you!” Heechul’s eyes were wide and he felt tears fill them. “You better be glad I was the only one. The Duke almost saw. Do you know what would happen to all of us if he were to find out?”
“Oh, Kangin you’re being silly…it’s just a fling. Nothing serious.” Heechul’s knees felt weak but he smiled at Kangin.
“This has to end, fling or not. The Duke holds the deeds to this place. You’re putting all of us in danger. You are not to meet with the writer again.” Kangin abruptly let go of his arm and turned to walk away. “You will meet the Duke tonight and have dinner with him. Do you understand?”
Heechul nodded slowly, tears that had filled his eyes began to fall. His knees quickly gave out and he slumped to the ground. What was he going to do? The Duke holds the deeds to his life, Hankyung held the deeds to his heart. Heechul was not going to sit here and feel bad for himself, but the tears kept flowing even after he had picked himself up from the ground. He walked down the stairs and slowly out the side door to his dressing room; the new one Siwon had given him. The outfit was already picked out for the dinner that evening with Siwon and when Heechul saw it there was a catch in his throat. He started to cough and slowly looked at himself in the mirror that was hung up on the wall. There was nothing resembling the man of this morning, the one that had the light in his eyes, the glow in his cheeks. All Heechul saw was a pale and fragile man in the mirror. The coughs didn’t stop and Heechul put his hand up to his lips, the coughs sent violent and painful shocks through his chest, his whole body shuddering with each cough. When he pulled his hand back there was blood coating it and Heechul stared at it with shock, the coughs wouldn’t stop and he couldn’t breath. “Oh God, oh God.” A hoarse whisper burst from his throat as he felt himself sink under into the dim realm of unconsciousness.
Two men sat alone waiting for Heechul to meet them that night. One held the promises of love in his hands, the other with passion so strong that it set his body on fire and denied him common sense and rationality. As the Duke was ready to send Kyuhyun to search for Kangin, Kangin burst through the doors. “Heechul…is…well he’s…at the church.”
“The church.” The Duke sneered. He didn’t like that Kangin was spitting upon religion. Heechul was most definitely not confessing any of his sins. It would take months and Siwon didn’t have the patience. “Do you take me as a fool?”
“No of course not, but it’s true! Heechul said he wanted to be clean and pure for his first night with you.” Kangin smiled at him and the Duke felt a stirring in his heart.
“Heechul wont be coming tonight?”
Kangin shook his head, glancing guiltily at the untouched, cold food laid out on the table. “I’m terribly sorry, dear Duke. He won’t be attending tonight.”
Siwon slammed a hand on the table. He selfishly wanted Heechul tonight whether he was at the church or not. There was certainly nothing he could do about it though, so as he watched Kangin’s retreating figure he picked up his fork and started to eat.
Hankyung waited up until the first light of morning touched the clouds of the sky. He felt tears sting his eyes. Why hadn’t Heechul come tonight? Donghae had fallen asleep on the couch and suddenly woke up with a jolt. “Hankyung, did Heechul ever arrive?”
Hankyung shook his head and Donghae didn’t pry anymore. He saw the hurt in Hankyung’s eyes so he didn’t push the subject; he just reached and squeezed his hand. “I’m sure it’s nothing to be upset about.” Donghae smiled a reassuring smile and walked through the door that Heechul, that night, never entered.
The doctor stood next to Heechul’s bed and Eeteuk scanned his eyes as he held Heechul’s hand. Tears were falling down his face as he saw the doctor shake his head. “Don’t just stand there beside me, silently shaking your head. What’s wrong with him?”
The doctor filled a syringe with clear liquid, pushing it into Heechul’s arm and then turned to Eeteuk. “This will help him sleep tonight. He’ll feel weak in the morning but he should be able to continue what he is doing for a little while longer.”
Eeteuk angrily grabbed the doctor’s arms and shook him. “What is wrong with him? What is wrong with my Heechul?”
The doctor looked down at the floor. “It isn’t good. He has consumption…it’s in the later stages. There is nothing I can do…”
Eeteuk let his arms fall from the doctor’s shoulders. It felt like all the air had been sucked from his body. This couldn’t be happening, not to Heechul, he had more life in him than anyone Eeteuk knew. Eeteuk fell to his knees; his tears starting to fall and he buried his face in his hands. “No, no, no, no.” He didn’t know how many times he repeated these words but suddenly he felt arms around him and Kangin’s voice.
“How long does he have?”
The doctor paused for a long moment before answering. “A couple of months at the most. His lungs are already starting to deteriorate.”
Eeteuk sobbed harder at those words. “My baby, my poor baby.”
Kangin rubbed his back and Eeteuk heard his voice shake as he said. “Don’t let him know, you can’t let him know. His spirit will leave him if he finds out he’s dying.”
Eeteuk dropped his hands from his face, turning to gaze at Heechul’s pale and sweat covered face. He couldn’t save Heechul from his fate. He was now too far to reach, the fingers of death had pulled him away and Eeteuk felt helpless, vulnerable and he turned his eyes to Kangin, nodding. “I can’t tell him.” Eeteuk felt a piece of his heart slowly chip away and he started to sob again.
A/N: I'm sorry. I'm really sorry *goes off to cry*