from dan:
a guy elbows up to the bar and stares at his watch and the chic next to him goes "is your lady runnin late?" and he goes, "no it's this hitech watch- and right now it tells me you're not wearin any panties" and she blushes and says "well dear sir i think it's time for you to buy a watch because i most certainly am" and he goes "hm. damn thing's an hour fast"