Mellow
Its weird, life that is. Im mellow for once. no feeling at the moment can really explain what i fell though. not even mellow is the right word. Its like i have a salve on a cut and it feels better but once the salve goes away i know the pain will be back and the envetiable "infection" will occur. what the infection will be this time i have no idea but it will probably be my father as usual. I still want his attention and approval and yet it never comes why do i put my self though this? Ive realized long ago that nothing i do will be good enough for him yet i still seek his affection. Even after the literal hell.