26 + 1 Thinkies About "Sleeper"
Hey! Another new episode of Torchwood, just a week after the last one. One would think it was, y'know, a television show or something. Huh. Imagine that, somewhere in the world they have more on TV than reruns, reality shows and truly nasty political ads.
Once again I am diving into the new episode, "Sleeper", unspoiled and unsullied. Once again, I am baring my shallow squeeing fangirl thinkies to the world as they happen. All the cool kids are doing it.
1) Right off the bat, we have a "Whuh?" moment in Jack's opener. Torchwood is ready? For what, lunch? It sounds like he's trying to convince himself. He sure hasn't convinced me.
2) Blah blah blah victims. I'm never interested in pre-title victims. I just wait for the little "reveal" right before the titles that tell us why it's weird.
3) I'd play hockey with Jack... who wouldn't?
4) Oh gods, Owen and Gwen are playing detective. At least Gwen has some excuse -- hey, did Owen just call her Jessica Fletcher? Isn't she the little old lady on that TV show who goes around and shoves her nose into murders and nobody ever suspects her of being the murderer? They have that show on Brit TV? How bizarre.
5) Why are they interested in the crime in the first place? Am I missing something on why Torchwood would be called in for a routine crime? Wait, sorry, that's a plot problem. As if I watched Torchwood for the plot. My bad.
6) That explosion you just heard was my panties. Jack. Interrogation room. Hoods and handcuffs. "Just us in this room for as long as it takes." Holy.... um, I'll be in my bunk.
Aaaaaanyway *ahem*, on we go.
7) Hi, Ianto! Don't you look lovely --- AAAAAAAAAAAAH! DUDE, that little exchange between Jack and Ianto. Just... GUH. That is going to be on endless loop in my brain for the rest of my life. As a matter of fact, REWIND!
Holy shit, this episode is only a few minutes in and I'm going to have to change the battery in my *cough* sonic screwdriver.
8) Gwen, oh, Gwen. "If you're innocent you have nothing to worry about" is the most specious of fascist arguments. I'm really disappointed in you. Between this and Jack's "we don't need no steenking charges" I'm starting to get a few shivers. But that's cool. I don't know if Chibnall is going to go anywhere with this, but part of what little arc there was last season had to do with how working at Torchwood fucks you up. I wouldn't mind seeing more of that. "Don't make this any harder on yourself." *brrrrrrrr*
9) I love the new Hub set. So very steampunk. And it does look as though Torchwood is receiving more funding.
10) I love Ianto and his whazzamacallit resonator. Of course we don't sniff it!
11) Jack is being such a bastard! And we have a Janet sighting! Whee!
12) Y'know, I just start getting ready to say, I love Ianto's suit and shirt and I love his snark and isn't he cute blah blah -- and then he goes and sits down in a chair with wrist shackles. WRIST SHACKLES. ALL RIGHT, WHICH ONE OF YOU SLUTS IS SENDING MY FIC TO CHIBNALL? I WANT MY ROYALTIES DAMMIT!
13) OMGOMG! ELECTRO!IANTO RULES! My gods, is he getting getting play tonight! This is what happens when TPTB actually listen to what the fangirls want. This, my friends, is what happens when TPTB *are* fangirls!
14) "You'll probably get dehydrated during the probing." I. Have. No. Words.
15) Jack's manners in bed. No. Words.
Okay, I lied. In the time it took me to type that I'm kinda snickering at Jack. Whazzamatter, Mr. Intergalactic Sex Bomb can't dish it out as well as he takes it? Where's your sexual bravado now? And don't tell me about "inappropriate time and place". Jack is the very definition of "inappropriate time and place".
And also, I gotta say that I would think that Jack has extremely good sex manners, you know?
But still. Ianto criticises Jack's manners in bed. I think of that, and my brain just shuts down and goes GUH.
16) "Go deeper." Oh GODS, Jack.
17) "Nobody knows more than I do." YOU TELL 'EM, IANTO. On behalf of administrative personnel everywhere, I salute you.
18) Why is Jack being such a bastard? Why don't they just Retcon the plotgirl and let her go? Oh, right. Plot. Whatever.
19) Jack wears the wrist strap on one wrist and a watch on the other? Doesn't his wrist strap tell time? Oh well, he wears braces and a belt, too. What do I know?
20) So the sleepers are just going around killing people? That's the big plan? Right, right, plot. Ooh! Ianto has his hands on his hips! *hearts*
21) "I know everything. And it's at the bottom of the screen." I LOVE IANTO.
22) IANTO AND THE PHONES. Is my boy getting his snark on or what? *hearts hearts hearts*
23) The yummy dragon mural on the Hub wall is almost enough to distract me from Ianto-worship. Almost. Besides, it occurs to me: all that nice new stuff and pretty murals definitely means increased funding. Who do you think does the budget for Torchwood 3, hmmm? Who do you think writes the proposals and crunches the numbers and makes sure that all the right people get the right memos and the cheques keep coming in and going out to the right places? Yup, the "tea boy". Secretaries rule the world, people. Don't you forget it.
24) Yes, Ianto, he is very dashing indeed. *hearts* And I'm finally going to take this moment while the play is paused to admire Ianto's suit. It's far less subdued than what I've come to expect from him. The very bright shirt, the striped tie, even the pinstripe on the suit itself. I've always thought of Ianto as the dark suit in the background, the one you don't notice while he notices everything. This new suit seems more of a costume somehow, to me at least.
25) See? I told you that Ianto wouldn't have it off with Owen. :D *ducks objects thrown by Ianto/Owen shippers* Hee!
26) Aaaaaaand as Gwen leaves, we fade out on Jack fondling his big penetrative object and looking pensive. And the moment after fade, the cry comes from Jack's office: "Ianto! Get in here!" HA!
And my Plus One for the teaser for next episode: The soldier is cute, but WHERE'S MY BOYKISSING DAMMIT?
Once again I am diving into the new episode, "Sleeper", unspoiled and unsullied. Once again, I am baring my shallow squeeing fangirl thinkies to the world as they happen. All the cool kids are doing it.
1) Right off the bat, we have a "Whuh?" moment in Jack's opener. Torchwood is ready? For what, lunch? It sounds like he's trying to convince himself. He sure hasn't convinced me.
2) Blah blah blah victims. I'm never interested in pre-title victims. I just wait for the little "reveal" right before the titles that tell us why it's weird.
3) I'd play hockey with Jack... who wouldn't?
4) Oh gods, Owen and Gwen are playing detective. At least Gwen has some excuse -- hey, did Owen just call her Jessica Fletcher? Isn't she the little old lady on that TV show who goes around and shoves her nose into murders and nobody ever suspects her of being the murderer? They have that show on Brit TV? How bizarre.
5) Why are they interested in the crime in the first place? Am I missing something on why Torchwood would be called in for a routine crime? Wait, sorry, that's a plot problem. As if I watched Torchwood for the plot. My bad.
6) That explosion you just heard was my panties. Jack. Interrogation room. Hoods and handcuffs. "Just us in this room for as long as it takes." Holy.... um, I'll be in my bunk.
Aaaaaanyway *ahem*, on we go.
7) Hi, Ianto! Don't you look lovely --- AAAAAAAAAAAAH! DUDE, that little exchange between Jack and Ianto. Just... GUH. That is going to be on endless loop in my brain for the rest of my life. As a matter of fact, REWIND!
Holy shit, this episode is only a few minutes in and I'm going to have to change the battery in my *cough* sonic screwdriver.
8) Gwen, oh, Gwen. "If you're innocent you have nothing to worry about" is the most specious of fascist arguments. I'm really disappointed in you. Between this and Jack's "we don't need no steenking charges" I'm starting to get a few shivers. But that's cool. I don't know if Chibnall is going to go anywhere with this, but part of what little arc there was last season had to do with how working at Torchwood fucks you up. I wouldn't mind seeing more of that. "Don't make this any harder on yourself." *brrrrrrrr*
9) I love the new Hub set. So very steampunk. And it does look as though Torchwood is receiving more funding.
10) I love Ianto and his whazzamacallit resonator. Of course we don't sniff it!
11) Jack is being such a bastard! And we have a Janet sighting! Whee!
12) Y'know, I just start getting ready to say, I love Ianto's suit and shirt and I love his snark and isn't he cute blah blah -- and then he goes and sits down in a chair with wrist shackles. WRIST SHACKLES. ALL RIGHT, WHICH ONE OF YOU SLUTS IS SENDING MY FIC TO CHIBNALL? I WANT MY ROYALTIES DAMMIT!
13) OMGOMG! ELECTRO!IANTO RULES! My gods, is he getting getting play tonight! This is what happens when TPTB actually listen to what the fangirls want. This, my friends, is what happens when TPTB *are* fangirls!
14) "You'll probably get dehydrated during the probing." I. Have. No. Words.
15) Jack's manners in bed. No. Words.
Okay, I lied. In the time it took me to type that I'm kinda snickering at Jack. Whazzamatter, Mr. Intergalactic Sex Bomb can't dish it out as well as he takes it? Where's your sexual bravado now? And don't tell me about "inappropriate time and place". Jack is the very definition of "inappropriate time and place".
And also, I gotta say that I would think that Jack has extremely good sex manners, you know?
But still. Ianto criticises Jack's manners in bed. I think of that, and my brain just shuts down and goes GUH.
16) "Go deeper." Oh GODS, Jack.
17) "Nobody knows more than I do." YOU TELL 'EM, IANTO. On behalf of administrative personnel everywhere, I salute you.
18) Why is Jack being such a bastard? Why don't they just Retcon the plotgirl and let her go? Oh, right. Plot. Whatever.
19) Jack wears the wrist strap on one wrist and a watch on the other? Doesn't his wrist strap tell time? Oh well, he wears braces and a belt, too. What do I know?
20) So the sleepers are just going around killing people? That's the big plan? Right, right, plot. Ooh! Ianto has his hands on his hips! *hearts*
21) "I know everything. And it's at the bottom of the screen." I LOVE IANTO.
22) IANTO AND THE PHONES. Is my boy getting his snark on or what? *hearts hearts hearts*
23) The yummy dragon mural on the Hub wall is almost enough to distract me from Ianto-worship. Almost. Besides, it occurs to me: all that nice new stuff and pretty murals definitely means increased funding. Who do you think does the budget for Torchwood 3, hmmm? Who do you think writes the proposals and crunches the numbers and makes sure that all the right people get the right memos and the cheques keep coming in and going out to the right places? Yup, the "tea boy". Secretaries rule the world, people. Don't you forget it.
24) Yes, Ianto, he is very dashing indeed. *hearts* And I'm finally going to take this moment while the play is paused to admire Ianto's suit. It's far less subdued than what I've come to expect from him. The very bright shirt, the striped tie, even the pinstripe on the suit itself. I've always thought of Ianto as the dark suit in the background, the one you don't notice while he notices everything. This new suit seems more of a costume somehow, to me at least.
25) See? I told you that Ianto wouldn't have it off with Owen. :D *ducks objects thrown by Ianto/Owen shippers* Hee!
26) Aaaaaaand as Gwen leaves, we fade out on Jack fondling his big penetrative object and looking pensive. And the moment after fade, the cry comes from Jack's office: "Ianto! Get in here!" HA!
And my Plus One for the teaser for next episode: The soldier is cute, but WHERE'S MY BOYKISSING DAMMIT?