As the Train Rolled Out of Sight, Bye Bye
Hey, sorry if anyone was looking for a Monday post with a weekend update, but believe it or not, I have actually been busy at work. Can you believe it? I can't. Right now I have some down time though before I take my lunch break, so I figured might as well update y'all now right?
This weekend I didn't do much. On Friday my friend Jess won a free keg for an hour at a bar on the UES, so I went to that and got hella drunk. Those types of things are always fun. Then despite being hungover on Saturday, after going to the gym, I went with Dave to go see the most anticipated movie of the year, "Borat...". Oh man, what a great freakin movie. I don't think I have ever seen a packed theater of people simultaniously fall out of their seats in spastic laughter. For those of you who know the Ali G show, you will not be let down for the movie very much follows the format of the TV where the character of Borat goes on interviews with unsuspecting victims, and usually with his "honesty" gets the people he is talking to to reveal their honest sides; and yet it also still manages to tell a story as well. Sacha Beran Cohen is a genious. Plain and simple.It's a movie that even my mom would find funny if she wasn't so apposed to seeing it because she thinks it's all toilet humor. Of course there is plenty of toilet humor, but the majority of it is far more intelligent and racist...but racist in a good way (yes there is such a thing). You see, there is nothing an intelligent person can really take offence to in the movie, for all the stuff said by Borat is just something a made-up character is saying, mostly to get a reaction out of whomever he is interacting with, in order to create a reaction with whomever his audience might be. The rest of the racism in the film comes from the people who are not in on the joke (the majority of the other people on screne at any given time). When you see Borat talking to some guy at a Rodeo in Virginia, Borat is going to make an innocent comment, to which this guy is going to derive a racist and/or homophobic (or both) tirade. It's genious on Beran Cohen's part, because it is creating humor from the ignorance of others, which is what qualifies (in my book) as good racism. Not to mention the plethora of quote-able moments that everyone and their mother's took out of the theater, which Dave and I were not only repeating on our walk back to 30th Avenue, but also overhearing everyone else say as well. If you have not seen this movie yet, go out and see it. Bring a spare set of pants as well.
Then nothing really happening on Sunday. I didn't want to go into the city at all because of the marathon, however, I did go to the gym and work out while watching the marathon, which I found to be an interesting experience. Is it just me, or does Lance Armstrong run like a retarded/gay T-rex? I guess you ride bikes all your life, you forget how to move your arms except to make turns and drink from your water bottle. I also had an idea for a project, which I don't think i will end up following through on unless I can get commitment from anyone interested in helping me for an entire year. The idea, document myself preparing for next years marathon. Obviously it would be humorous, because a person like myself is not a marathon runner. I know this because I am myself. But it would be funny because I could approach the entire thing as seriously as possible; try to find financial backers for my run AND the documentary of me training/getting in shape for the run, hiring a personal trainer, interviewing past/current runners, and everything else that would come along with it (such as marketing the idea of the documentary and me running, etc). I mean think about it, yes I made some physical improvements over the course of this past year, but nothing so great as to qualify me for "marathon shape", however, I think it would be possible for me to convince people that I could get into marathon shape. And obviously I would follow this thing through, all the way to the marathon, where I would either, a) sleep through it b) hurt myself at the starting line c) run the marathon d) do something else that could be a funny ending. Of course as soon as I though about the amount of money it would cost me initially (especially the trainer, the dvr tapes, the battaries for my camera, paying someone to follow me with a camera on a pretty regular basis, etc, the starting budget could be anywhere from $1000+. I can't afford that. Unless I could financers to hop on from the begining, allowing me to deflect all costs, it'd be the only way I could do it. I normally don't share my ideas like this, but it would be so hard for me to start it without help, so maybe I could drum up interest on here.
Israel is only 2 months away from today, and I am getting all ants-in-pantsy. It's just going to be so much fun, although i am not looking forward to waking up at 6:30am on a Sunday just to get out to Newark Airport on time. Stupid Newark. Although I can officially say "Next Year in Jerusalem", because you see that's where I will be next year (2007).
Anyone else not voting today? I am sure most of my readers aren't, because our age demographic is the largest group of non-voters, so it would be un-American for us to do so. Plus, I don't know about other states, but I am totally put off to voting this mid-term in part to the slam campaigns. I don't think I saw a single add campaign this year that said anything along the lines of "I am running for blahblah and I stand for blah blah blah and blah". All I have seen is "I am blahblah and if you vote for blahblahblah he will kill your family." How is that going to make me want to vote for either of you? Since when did politicians start taking cues from 3rd graders? Also, since when did politics become less about stand-points and more about put-downs? And then there are the two parties themselves (we can ignore third parties because unfortunately third parties are just an excuse to deffer voters). The Republicans have become a party with a strong base built on conservative religious rules. The Democrats on the other hand, have become so "wishy-washy" that they haven't got a leg to stand on. As I have said before, they have been given more then enough chances to take charge situations, and comepletely dropped the ball. How can I support a group that can't support themselves? On the other hand, I am not a fan of conservative religious views, either (for the most part). So how can I be expected to vote when there is no one for me to vote for? I can vote for a third party, but like I said, that's just throwing a vote away, and if I were to vote, I would most likely vote Dem, just to break up the GOP triffecta we have going in the house right now; and voting Democrat in NY is like throwing a pebble into a rock quary, it does absolutely nothing. So the only way I would vote, while being a resident of a blue state, is to vote republican, if there were a republican I felt deserved to be in office. So why should I waste my time in going out to the polls today. in the words of George Carlin "You'll go out and vote, and I'll stay home and masterbate. Essentially we will both be doing the same thing, but in the end, I'll have something to show for it."
Today's Entry:
Masterbate - to vote
"On election day, everybody masterbates."
This weekend I didn't do much. On Friday my friend Jess won a free keg for an hour at a bar on the UES, so I went to that and got hella drunk. Those types of things are always fun. Then despite being hungover on Saturday, after going to the gym, I went with Dave to go see the most anticipated movie of the year, "Borat...". Oh man, what a great freakin movie. I don't think I have ever seen a packed theater of people simultaniously fall out of their seats in spastic laughter. For those of you who know the Ali G show, you will not be let down for the movie very much follows the format of the TV where the character of Borat goes on interviews with unsuspecting victims, and usually with his "honesty" gets the people he is talking to to reveal their honest sides; and yet it also still manages to tell a story as well. Sacha Beran Cohen is a genious. Plain and simple.It's a movie that even my mom would find funny if she wasn't so apposed to seeing it because she thinks it's all toilet humor. Of course there is plenty of toilet humor, but the majority of it is far more intelligent and racist...but racist in a good way (yes there is such a thing). You see, there is nothing an intelligent person can really take offence to in the movie, for all the stuff said by Borat is just something a made-up character is saying, mostly to get a reaction out of whomever he is interacting with, in order to create a reaction with whomever his audience might be. The rest of the racism in the film comes from the people who are not in on the joke (the majority of the other people on screne at any given time). When you see Borat talking to some guy at a Rodeo in Virginia, Borat is going to make an innocent comment, to which this guy is going to derive a racist and/or homophobic (or both) tirade. It's genious on Beran Cohen's part, because it is creating humor from the ignorance of others, which is what qualifies (in my book) as good racism. Not to mention the plethora of quote-able moments that everyone and their mother's took out of the theater, which Dave and I were not only repeating on our walk back to 30th Avenue, but also overhearing everyone else say as well. If you have not seen this movie yet, go out and see it. Bring a spare set of pants as well.
Then nothing really happening on Sunday. I didn't want to go into the city at all because of the marathon, however, I did go to the gym and work out while watching the marathon, which I found to be an interesting experience. Is it just me, or does Lance Armstrong run like a retarded/gay T-rex? I guess you ride bikes all your life, you forget how to move your arms except to make turns and drink from your water bottle. I also had an idea for a project, which I don't think i will end up following through on unless I can get commitment from anyone interested in helping me for an entire year. The idea, document myself preparing for next years marathon. Obviously it would be humorous, because a person like myself is not a marathon runner. I know this because I am myself. But it would be funny because I could approach the entire thing as seriously as possible; try to find financial backers for my run AND the documentary of me training/getting in shape for the run, hiring a personal trainer, interviewing past/current runners, and everything else that would come along with it (such as marketing the idea of the documentary and me running, etc). I mean think about it, yes I made some physical improvements over the course of this past year, but nothing so great as to qualify me for "marathon shape", however, I think it would be possible for me to convince people that I could get into marathon shape. And obviously I would follow this thing through, all the way to the marathon, where I would either, a) sleep through it b) hurt myself at the starting line c) run the marathon d) do something else that could be a funny ending. Of course as soon as I though about the amount of money it would cost me initially (especially the trainer, the dvr tapes, the battaries for my camera, paying someone to follow me with a camera on a pretty regular basis, etc, the starting budget could be anywhere from $1000+. I can't afford that. Unless I could financers to hop on from the begining, allowing me to deflect all costs, it'd be the only way I could do it. I normally don't share my ideas like this, but it would be so hard for me to start it without help, so maybe I could drum up interest on here.
Israel is only 2 months away from today, and I am getting all ants-in-pantsy. It's just going to be so much fun, although i am not looking forward to waking up at 6:30am on a Sunday just to get out to Newark Airport on time. Stupid Newark. Although I can officially say "Next Year in Jerusalem", because you see that's where I will be next year (2007).
Anyone else not voting today? I am sure most of my readers aren't, because our age demographic is the largest group of non-voters, so it would be un-American for us to do so. Plus, I don't know about other states, but I am totally put off to voting this mid-term in part to the slam campaigns. I don't think I saw a single add campaign this year that said anything along the lines of "I am running for blahblah and I stand for blah blah blah and blah". All I have seen is "I am blahblah and if you vote for blahblahblah he will kill your family." How is that going to make me want to vote for either of you? Since when did politicians start taking cues from 3rd graders? Also, since when did politics become less about stand-points and more about put-downs? And then there are the two parties themselves (we can ignore third parties because unfortunately third parties are just an excuse to deffer voters). The Republicans have become a party with a strong base built on conservative religious rules. The Democrats on the other hand, have become so "wishy-washy" that they haven't got a leg to stand on. As I have said before, they have been given more then enough chances to take charge situations, and comepletely dropped the ball. How can I support a group that can't support themselves? On the other hand, I am not a fan of conservative religious views, either (for the most part). So how can I be expected to vote when there is no one for me to vote for? I can vote for a third party, but like I said, that's just throwing a vote away, and if I were to vote, I would most likely vote Dem, just to break up the GOP triffecta we have going in the house right now; and voting Democrat in NY is like throwing a pebble into a rock quary, it does absolutely nothing. So the only way I would vote, while being a resident of a blue state, is to vote republican, if there were a republican I felt deserved to be in office. So why should I waste my time in going out to the polls today. in the words of George Carlin "You'll go out and vote, and I'll stay home and masterbate. Essentially we will both be doing the same thing, but in the end, I'll have something to show for it."
Today's Entry:
Masterbate - to vote
"On election day, everybody masterbates."