Oh. My. God.

[spicycheerio]

Hi.
My name is Santana Lopez.
And I'm incredibly offended right now.

Please, tell me he's not serious. How DARE he ruin my most FAVOURITE song?

I'm suddenly appreciative of your personality, Kurt.

Am I the only one to be seriously offended by this?
Mercedes!?

Comments

[elphabahummel]

No Santana, he is not related to me.

I actually want to inflict physical violence on him, possibly with a tazer. I am incredibly offended by everything about him - seriously. For a moment I almost understood what terrifies Azimio and Karofsky.

On the upside, I now appreciate your rendition far more.

Kill it, kill it, kill it, kill it. Burn it. Give it to Puck.

[spicycheerio]

Just checking. ;)

You own a tazar...? Awesome.
At least you don't freaking giggle like a mad man.
If you laughed like that... oh my god.

Well, OBVIOUSLY.

I can only IMAGINE what Puck would do.

[elphabahummel]

Promise to tazer Puck for me and you can borrow it. And if I laughed like that, I would dumpster-toss myself. Actually I would let Jacob Ben Israel dumpster toss me.

Not that I didn't before of course, you are always fabulously catty.

Pee on it to defend his masculinity?

[spicycheerio]

Ouch, Hummel. That's low...
I would too.

Flattery won't get you anywhere, Hummel. ;)
But thanks!

HAHA- or beat the living daylights out of him.

[elphabahummel]

I would tazer him myself but I couldn't get near enough inconspicuously. Not that I think about causing Puckerman serious damage often.

Flattery would be insincere praise that would benefit me in some way. I neither want to have sexual relations with you nor would I have anything to gain from needlessly fluffing your ego. I simply feel you have a very Eartha Kitt quality. I respect that.

Beat him and then pee on him?

[spicycheerio]

Pissed at Pucky Puck, eh? Happens often, happens often.

Like, THE Eartha Kitt? Like, CAT WOMAN?
Kurt. I may have under estimated you.
I love Cat Woman... does that make me a loser?
I even kind of like the Halle Berry movie?

[elphabahummel]

Well, most do under-estimate me. But yes, Cat Woman. You have a certain feline sensuality and evil genius that can only be compared to the Eartha Kitt incarnation.

She is fabulous. I do too, shh.

[spicycheerio]

So. Like. You are comparing me to a Catwoman, Hummel?
Not bad. Not bad at all. I just hope you don't think of me as Yzma, that purple thing in Emperor's New Groove. I hear Eartha Kit voices her.
I know Disney Movies because of my sisters. And Brittany.

I don't own the movie anymore. I kind of want to cry, but that's against my policy.

[elphabahummel]

Urgh, definitely not - your superiority is, to an extent, earned and not forced unlike that things. She makes a mockery of the classic Disney villains who were truly evil - Scar, Jafar, Ursala.

[spicycheerio]

You are forgetting Cruella DeVil! Oh and Frollo, from Hunchback of Notredame. Oh and how can we forget Maleficent? Like, wow.

[elphabahummel]

Oh, of course! Maleficent is the epitome of magnificently evil female Disney villains. Frollo was interesting but intensely creepy and Cruella, do not even get me started.

It had been far too long since I went on a Disney binge.

[spicycheerio]

Cruella is a personal favourite of mine, hate and I'll skin you.
What about Gaston from Beauty And The Beast?
I loved him a child. So. Much.

I have all Disney movies, FYI.
I even have Roger Rabbit. But the mini-satans aren't allowed to watch that.
So like, you can kill your binge here.
And I want to know what kind of stuff you use for your face.

[elphabahummel]

I'm afraid that I'm simply too fond of dogs to ever truly like Cruella - though I do appreciate her fashion sense (minus the fur).

Gaston reminds me of Puck.

Roger Rabbit is amazing, I can't believe some people dislike it.
Perhaps I will take you up on your offer.
It would be my pleasure to share my secrets with you.

[spicycheerio]

To look into the eyes of a puppy and want to skin it is so admirable.
But I don't feel like arguing with you. What?

Gaston is wonderful.
"Pumpkin... extend with me!"
My sisters saw the Broadway Version.
But we all knew he had something for Lefou. So obvious.
Double what!? I have no idea what I'm saying anymore.

Jessica Rabbit is... drop-dead gorgeous.
Sure! As long as we don't watch Fox And The Hound.
~~*Fabulous!*~~. Am I supposed to say I'm looking forward to it?
'Cause I am. Sort of. Not really. Well. Maybe.

[elphabahummel]

Oh, I would kill to see it on Broadway!

I would have to agree, she may not be my type, but she certainly is a fine figure of a woman.

I shan't tell anyone.

[spicycheerio]

Eh. It was pretty good.
Actually, it was fucking amazing.

You can tell people. Raise your status. Besides. It's win-win because the in thing is to have a gay friend. I mean. Paris Hilton has billions, and she's awesome.