What They Couldn't Take, for Afifa
Title: What They Couldn't Take
For: Afifa
Characters/Pairings: Sirius/OC; Marauders appear
Rating: 3rd-5h years
Warnings (if any): None that I can think of
A/N:I know you didn't specifically say Sirius/OC, but I figured you'd enjoy this. I tried to make it romance-y and fluffy, and its not entirely, but this is the best I can do. I hope you like it, dear. Many many thanks to Haylee and Kat for betaing this.
What They Couldn’t Take
Swell and break. Swell and break. It is the only music you are allowed, the only constant sound; the crashing of the waves. The only sight is black, black, black and stone. The smell of sea air, so salty; you have been here for so long that the salt is seeping into your skin, diffusing into your veins. Time stretches so far that you can almost see it, running right past you, you will never catch it.
Never but once every year.
You can only tell how many godforsaken years have passed through this desolate hell-hole when winter comes around. The waves are harsher, they beat harder. The air is crisper, frigid against your gaunt face, and the music is crashing cymbals and beating drums rather than the usual soothing surf.
And you only know that it is Christmas because of them. Because of the Dementors.
They know when December Twenty-Fifth comes creeping along. They become restless, giddy even. They know that winter and Christmas time bring the happiest memories, the fondest recollections. You can feel their hunger in the air, hear it in their rattling breaths.
Fresh bait for the damned.
But there is one prisoner whose happy Christmas memory they can never seem to suck. For some reason it infuriates them every year, you have been able to hold onto that face, to that voice, to that touch. You have been able to hold onto her.
You will always have Waverly Lennox.
~*~
The common room was nearly empty; so close to Christmas no one wanted to stay indoors for long. Most of the students were either down in the Great Hall enjoying hot cocoa or out on the grounds engaging in snowball fights or building snowmen. It was snowing lightly outside now, snowflakes swirling and tumbling and turning to the ground. He could see the Forbidden Forest in the distance through the oval window directly across from where he sat, the tops of the trees covered in a white blanket of snow like frosting on cupcakes.
Sirius Black was content spending his time in Gryffindor Tower with the people he loved the most - his friends. Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew were seated on the floor in front of the couch facing the fire. James Potter and Lily Evans, still newly dating, sat close together on the couch.
“I can’t believe it’s already almost Christmas. Only a week left,” Lily was saying. She shifted on the couch, leaning into James’ chest a little more. Sirius looked at James and smiled; it had taken a lot for his friend to finally get where he was now, and Sirius was happy for him. James and Lily made a good couple; Sirius had always known Lily would come around eventually.
“Don’t remind me,” James groaned. “If it’s almost Christmas then it’s almost Sluggy’s Black and White Ball.” He paused and then let out a faint “Ow!” as Lily elbowed him in the ribs.
“What’s the matter, Prongs?” Sirius called, the smile widening as he poked fun at his friend.
“Don’t you want to show off your excellent dancing to your new girlfriend?”
“You shut it, Padfoot,” James replied, picking up one of the pillows from behind him and chucking it in Sirius’ direction. Sirius burrowed deeper into his armchair to avoid the flying pillow and laughed loudly.
“I was only joking, mate. No need to get violent.” He sat up straighter, though he was still slouching, legs spread lazily and his arms hanging over the sides of the armchair.
“What about you, Padfoot?” Peter suddenly spoke up from his place on the floor. He poked at the fire as he said, “Don’t you have a date yet?”
Shifting in his seat, Sirius sighed loudly. “The usual leeches keep dropping hints for me to ask them. At this point, though, I think I’m going to have to ask one of them.” He frowned, his eyebrows pulling together over his gray eyes.
Remus chuckled and said, “Why don’t you just go alone then, if you don’t want a date? It’s not like a date is required.”
Sirius cocked his head to the side, thinking about it for a moment. Remus was right; he didn’t have to have a date. But on the other hand, if he did…
“It isn’t a date that’s the problem, it’s finding the right girl,” Sirius finally replied.
It was silent for a moment until Lily sat up, pushing off James a bit. He looked up at her in confusion, holding her arm steady with a hand. Lily was looking past Sirius at the portrait hole, and Sirius knew from the creak of the hinges that it had opened; someone had entered. Lily turned back to him them, the light of an idea bright in her green eyes. Sirius knew that look, and it always made him anxious.
“Why not ask Waverly?” she whispered to him. “You two are good friends anyway, aren’t you? Then you would have a date, but it wouldn’t have to be someone you don’t like.”
Sirius sat a bit straighter, contemplating Lily’s words. Waverly Lennox… Lily was right; they were good friends. Not best mates by any means, but he enjoyed her company in Ancient Runes and Defense Against the Dark Arts. Maybe Lily had something there…
As he was contemplating, Waverly walked up to the couch behind Lily and James and stopped, smiling at them all and lifting her hand off the back of the couch in a gesture of greeting.
“Hey Waverly,” Lily chirped, sitting up all the way and crossing her legs on the couch. She turned her head and tilted her chin upwards to better talk to the blonde in front of her. “Why don’t you have a seat and join us?” Lily gestured toward the empty armchair across from Sirius. “We were just discussing the ball Slughorn is throwing on Friday night.” She paused for a moment before adding, “Do you have a date yet?”
Pushing a lock of her long blonde hair behind her right ear, Waverly answered, “Not yet, no.” In Waverly’s pause, Lily snuck a meaningful look at Sirius, eyes bright and smile wide. She cocked her head ever so slightly and Sirius wrinkled his nose. Lily Evans had never been very good at discreetness when she was trying to make a match.
“I’ll come and join you in a minute,” Waverly was saying now as she pulled off her mittens, and Sirius turned his attention back to her. She really wasn’t all that bad looking, now that he was thinking about it. Of about average height, she had a medium frame and a small face.
Strawberry blonde hair fell over her chest, straight as a pin and under a red trimmed with gold beanie that covered the top of her head and her ears. The eyes were a light blue-ish green, something Sirius had never noticed until just then, and her skin was a healthy golden color.
“I’m going to go up and put away these boots first. My feet are soaked and frozen,” Waverly finished. She chuckled slightly and then turned to head up the stairs.
Lily twisted around again and cocked her head in a much bigger motion than she had done before. “Go after her and ask!” she mouthed to him and then made a motion with her hands. It seemed Lily had more urgency than he did, and the thought caused Sirius to chuckle to himself.
Sirius considered for another moment as he watched Waverly walk away, the sway of her hips like hypnosis. Making his decision, he stood and started toward the stairs, jogging to catch her before she went up.
“Hey Lennox!” he called when she had stepped onto the first step of the staircase. She turned slowly, both feet on the step now so that their faces were level. She gave the smallest hint of a smile and placed a hand on the railing. Sirius watched it for a moment, the way the long delicate fingers curled around the rail, and then looked back up at her slightly puzzled face.
“Yes, Black?” she asked, tilting her head to the side and smiling a little wider.
Putting his hands in the pockets of his trousers, Sirius looked into her eyes. “I was just wondering if you might go to the dance with me… since you don’t have a date, and nor do I.” He paused, grinned lopsidedly, and added quickly, “I mean, as friends. It could be fun, don’t you think?”
Waverly looked at her boots, tugged on her scarf once or twice, and then looked up at him again. For a moment when she looked down, Sirius had been worried that she might say no, but the smile she was giving him now washed away any doubt.
“Sure,” she agreed with a soft chuckle. “I would love to.” She paused, the grin spreading as she said, “So long as you keep that Black charm hidden away. I mean, since we’re just going as friends and all.”
Sirius winked and grinned. “No promises,” he replied. Reaching up, he rubbed her shoulder lightly before turning away to head back toward the armchair, the smile refusing to leave his lips. He wasn’t entirely sure why the giddy feeling in his stomach had sprung up; Waverly Lennox was just a friend. A pretty friend, but still just a friend, he told himself. But his subconscious still found a way to sneak to the surface, whispering something in his head like the buzz of a fly, over and over.
For now.
~*~
The week passed quickly for Sirius with the Black and White Ball and Christmas Eve fast approaching. He saw Waverly a few times; they talked the most in Ancient Runes, as she sat beside him in that class. James’ parents sent them both new black dress robes for the occasion; he had been at the Potter house for over a year now and Noah and Sarah were more than happy to buy the extra robes. Sirius was like a son to them, they had said so themselves, and he could never express his gratitude enough for everything they did for him.
The night of the ball had the boys down in the common room awaiting their ladies. Even Peter had a date, Melody Keith; her white dress reached below her knees and her mousy brown hair was pulled up in a fancy twist. She was the first of the girls to come down, and Sirius and James had already exhausted their jokes by the time Lily and Remus’ date, Penelope Gold, came down together.
“Waverly’s coming, Sirius, she’s just putting the finishing touches on her hair,” Lily told him as she and James walked over. Lily looked pretty in her long white dress, her red hair done halfway up and curled, a choker of pearls at her neck. Their hands were entwined, and Sirius wondered vaguely how Waverly’s small hand would feel in his large one.
Lily’s whisper, closer now, pulled him out of his thoughts. “And she looks gorgeous, Black. I’m not sure you’ll be able to handle it.”
Sirius grinned, his head turned down and to the side toward Lily. “I think I’ll manage, Evans,” he said back.
“Oh yeah?” Lily asked, louder this time. She giggled and then finished, “We’ll see about that. She’s here.”
The sight that met his eyes when Sirius looked up caught him completely off guard, like he had crashed head on into a glass door that he had not seen. His breath caught in his throat, his chest constricted, and his stomach took one giant swoop all at once. Waverly was descending the staircase, but she did not look like the Waverly Lennox Sirius remembered. She did not look like the pretty friend he talked to in Ancient Runes or the girl in Defense that was dressed like all the others.
There was no other word for it - Waverly Lennox was stunning.
Her dress, like Lily’s, was floor-length, and the neckline dipped in just the right way. Her long strawberry blond hair was down but the fringe she usually had was pinned up and back, creating a small pouf at her hair line. Her skin seemed to shine, at least to Sirius, and he couldn’t seem to make his body do anything but watch her move until she was standing and speaking right in front of him.
“Sirius? Hello? Are you okay?” Waverly asked, her eyebrows pulled together slightly in her puzzlement. She snapped her fingers and then laughed softly. James, Peter, Remus, and Lily were snickering behind him, and Sirius shook himself into action, willing words to his mouth that still came too slow.
“Uh… yeah.” Reaching a hand up, he ruffled the back of his shaggy black hair, moving his hand up and down a few times before stilling it but not lowering it. “Yeah, I’m fine.” He paused, lowered his hand.
“Lennox, you look…”
“Gorgeous?” Lily broke in, leaning toward Sirius and grinning up at him, her expression classic Evans smug. Any other time that might have annoyed him, but Sirius didn’t have enough room for conflicting emotions. “I told you, Sirius,” Lily said, giggling again. “And she’s your date for Merlin’s sake. Call her Waverly, not Lennox.”
Sirius felt himself nodding but the action didn’t quite register. “Er… right,” he managed. “Waverly.” He caught himself still staring at her and quickly averted his eyes, looking down at the floor and putting his hands in the pockets of his robes. He still couldn’t believe this was the Waverly that he talked to on a daily basis, the Waverly he laughed with, the Waverly he was mates with and nothing more. This was the Waverly now pictured in his head in ways he was glad she could not see, in ways he had never before thought about her.
“Well, that’s everyone, isn’t it?” Lily asked the eight of them, breaking into Sirius’ thoughts. He was glad she could not see them, too.
“It isn’t fair,” Peter complained from his place beside the portrait hole with Melody.” You girls get to wear something different for a change, while we still have to wear these same stupid robes.” He tugged at the neckline of his own robes that were trimmed in a short lining of white lace.
“They aren’t the same, they’re dress robes,” Waverly said, turning her attention to him now. “There’s a difference, Peter. These are for special occasions.”
“Ruffles. Woo-hoo,” Peter replied, rolling his eyes and twirling the pointer finger of his free hand in a gesture of sarcastic excitement. “That makes me feel so much better, Waverly.”
Laughing, Sirius managed to add, “It’s all right, Wormtail. You look good in a little lace. You should consider wearing it more often.” He laughed a little harder and Waverly snickered as well, putting a hand over her mouth as she did.
“Ha-ha, Padfoot,” Peter grumbled, but didn’t say anything more.
When everyone was accounted for, Lily finished, “Shall we go, then?” James offered her his arm and she wound hers around it; Sirius did the same for Waverly. Her touch was warm even through the fabric of his robes, and Sirius tried not to concentrate on the heat slowly spreading through his body.
He could do this. She was still the same Waverly, the same mate he could joke with in class. It was just a ball, just a stupid Christmas ball thrown by Slughorn of all people. That was a thought he could hold onto, a thought that kept away the others - with his large stomach and his fake laugh and his constant lament over losing Sirius to Gryffindor house, Professor Slughorn was an effective killjoy.
If only he could hold onto it.
~*~
Slughorn had his Christmas Ball down in the dungeons, of course. The eight of them followed the small crowd to his office, which, Sirius realized upon entering, had been magically expanded. The room, which he had been in numerous times before, was hardly recognizable. There was a small dance floor in the middle of the room, and a line of rectangular tables along the right side wall laden with food and drinks. The band was on a platform against the wall opposite the door where they stood.
“I didn’t think Slughorn would have invited this many people,” James commented as the group made their way to one of the empty circular tables spaced out around the room.
“He didn’t,” Lily said from beside James. “Half these people are only here as dates.”
“Oh,” James stated, “right.” They reached the table, and he pulled out a chair for Lily before taking his own seat. Peter did the same for Melody, as did Remus for Penelope. Sirius hesitated before doing the same for Waverly; he was still feeling unnecessarily anxious, and it was starting to get on his nerves. She was just a girl for Merlin’s sake; why the hell was he acting so… unlike himself? Perhaps because she was a mate? A mate whose beauty he had not realized until she really put it on display. Whatever the reason, it was really starting to piss him off. His mouth felt dry, and he looked over to the punch bowl, deciding he needed a drink.
“I’m going to get some punch,” he told the table without taking a seat. Turning to Waverly, he asked, “Do you want anything, Len - er - Waverly?”
“Yeah, all right,” she answered, smiling up at him. “Thanks.”
“No problem,” he answered, grinning widely himself before starting around the table. When he reached James he pulled on the shoulder of his jacket. “You come with me,” he whispered with a tug. James came out of his seat rather haphazardly and muttered a jumbled “be right back” to Lily as the two boys started to leave.
As they walked, James straightened his coat and smoothed it down. “What’s up with you, Pads?”
They reached the punchbowl, and Sirius picked up the ladle and a cup. He hesitated, unsure what exactly he wanted to say. He had never been in this position before; it was usually James asking for advice, not Sirius.
Before he could say anything, however, James spoke up instead. “It’s Lennox, isn’t it?” He raised a knowing eyebrow and cracked a smug smile. Sirius frowned, annoyed that his friend found this amusing.
Catching his error, James composed his face and said, “Oh, stop pretending like you need my advice, Pads. Just do what you do.” The way James said it, it sounded so terrible. But Sirius didn’t know any other way.
“Oh, shut it, Prongs,” Sirius grumbled, looking over at their table again. Someone had said something funny and Waverly was laughing. For some reason, as he watched her, Sirius could hear that laugh the way he knew it would sound, and it stirred something in his stomach.
“See, don’t need my advice,” James commented as they started back, cups in hands.
When he and James got back to the table, Sirius still did not take a seat. The band had begun a new song, a slow song, and instead of sitting, Sirius took Waverly’s hand in his and made a show of bowing deeply before asking, “Miss Waverly Lennox, may I have this dance?” He grinned lopsidedly, the way he knew always worked, and winked.
Smiling, Waverly stood and let him lead her onto the floor. As they walked, she chuckled and whispered, “I thought I said not to put on the Black charm?”
Sirius snorted as they reached a good spot on the floor, turning her to face him. He placed a hand on her waist and gripped hers with the other, the grin still wide on his face. The feel of her body under his hand shot a pulse of electricity up his arm, but he tried to ignore it and feigned innocence to Waverly’s question.
“Who’s charming anyone?” he asked as they began to spin slowly. “I’m just being myself… I can’t help it if I’m charismatic.”
Waverly laughed, tilting her head back as she did. “I suppose you can’t help that you’re so arrogant either, can you?”
Sirius leaned in closer to her, their cheeks just barely brushing. The sensation made the hairs on his neck stand up, but in a good way. A very good way. “It’s part of the charm, love,” he whispered in her ear. She didn’t giggle, but Sirius could feel the heat rushing to her face and his grin widened a little more.
They danced that way until the song ended, and then Sirius pulled back only a little. Someone - Slughorn, perhaps - had put a spell on the ceiling of the dungeons so that it started to lightly snow, in just the same way that it was outdoors. It gave him an idea, and Sirius pulled away further, keeping hold of her hand and starting to lead her off the floor.
When he walked right past their table of friends, Waverly’s expression changed from polite curiosity to confusion. “Sirius, where-?”
“You’ll see,” he answered her before she could finish the question. Grinning to himself, he led her right out of the dungeon and headed for the nearest staircase.
~*~
Outside, the night was black but the stars were bright, twinkling on the dark canvas. It was lightly snowing and Waverly reached out a hand to catch a snowflake.
“It’s so pretty,” she commented, lifting her head a bit to catch the snow on her face. She opened her mouth and caught a few before giggling looking down again.
“I know,” Sirius agreed, taking his hands out of his robe pockets. He came up behind her and pulled her to him, knowing she must be cold in that white dress. She turned in his arms, smiling up at him, and Sirius felt his heart clench. Friends, his arse. Whatever her feelings, that was out the window for him.
“Cold,” she said quietly, looking down at his chest, blushing slightly. Sirius leaned against her some more, breathing her in. She titled her head back up to look at him, and Sirius took his chance, slowly closing the gap between them until their lips met softly. It was tentative at first, testing the boundaries and feeling the waters. Then, Sirius kissed her a little harder, a little needier, and then she was deepening it further before he’d even tried, opening herself to him.
After a few moments they pulled apart, breathing heavily as their hearts and their lungs tried to catch up. It was quiet until Waverly’s voice broke it with a shake-y question.
“Sirius… what are we doing?”
“I thought we were snogging,” Sirius joked against her lips. They felt soft and comfortable as he talked against them, but she pulled back a little more.
“No, I mean… we’re friends. I can’t - I won’t - I’m not one of your little adventures. I don’t want to ruin what we already have.” She paused, looked down at their entwined fingers, melting away a few snowflakes just for something to do. “That came out wrong,” she started again. “I didn’t mean to suggest - I just, I don’t know… Merlin, Sirius, you ma-”
Before she could finish any train of thought, Sirius silenced her with his lips, pulling her body closer to his again. He let his body melt into hers, could feel his nervous system going haywire and it felt so bloody good.
When they separated against, Sirius said, “I know, Wave, I know.” He paused, taking a deep breath before continuing, “I just like to live in the moment. Can’t you live with me?”
She was silent for a moment, and he could feel the tension of her body in his arms until she finally relaxed, letting herself go, falling into him. He groaned with relief and arousal.
“I think I could do that,” she whispered, looking up straight into his eyes, her gaze unwavering before the lids closed and she brought her lips to his again.
~*~
You are not sure why you can hold onto this, to her. To that night, to all those nights afterward, all those years. You don’t know the reasons she’s held fast to your mind like a toxin laced in your blood, binding to you.
Did you love her? Maybe.
The years following that first Christmas are hazy, lost to the endless suction of the terrible creatures that guard your cell. But that one night is engrained in your mind with such clarity it often physically hurts, your muscles clenching and your chest constricting. The memory so real you can almost touch her, taste her.
It hurts the most because you know you can’t.
The Dementors are still there, agitated, you can tell. Their rattling breath gets louder as they suck harder, trying and still failing to take that one last memory from you. It only angers them further and you know that tomorrow you will pay. They should know by now, but they won’t give up, won’t ever give up.
Yet you smile to yourself despite everything else, because you know they will never succeed.
Every Christmas, every year. In the most desolate place in the Wizarding world, you still have that Christmas and you still have her, and they cannot take her away. You have been able to hold onto her.
You will always have Waverly Lennox.
For: Afifa
Characters/Pairings: Sirius/OC; Marauders appear
Rating: 3rd-5h years
Warnings (if any): None that I can think of
A/N:I know you didn't specifically say Sirius/OC, but I figured you'd enjoy this. I tried to make it romance-y and fluffy, and its not entirely, but this is the best I can do. I hope you like it, dear. Many many thanks to Haylee and Kat for betaing this.
What They Couldn’t Take
Swell and break. Swell and break. It is the only music you are allowed, the only constant sound; the crashing of the waves. The only sight is black, black, black and stone. The smell of sea air, so salty; you have been here for so long that the salt is seeping into your skin, diffusing into your veins. Time stretches so far that you can almost see it, running right past you, you will never catch it.
Never but once every year.
You can only tell how many godforsaken years have passed through this desolate hell-hole when winter comes around. The waves are harsher, they beat harder. The air is crisper, frigid against your gaunt face, and the music is crashing cymbals and beating drums rather than the usual soothing surf.
And you only know that it is Christmas because of them. Because of the Dementors.
They know when December Twenty-Fifth comes creeping along. They become restless, giddy even. They know that winter and Christmas time bring the happiest memories, the fondest recollections. You can feel their hunger in the air, hear it in their rattling breaths.
Fresh bait for the damned.
But there is one prisoner whose happy Christmas memory they can never seem to suck. For some reason it infuriates them every year, you have been able to hold onto that face, to that voice, to that touch. You have been able to hold onto her.
You will always have Waverly Lennox.
~*~
The common room was nearly empty; so close to Christmas no one wanted to stay indoors for long. Most of the students were either down in the Great Hall enjoying hot cocoa or out on the grounds engaging in snowball fights or building snowmen. It was snowing lightly outside now, snowflakes swirling and tumbling and turning to the ground. He could see the Forbidden Forest in the distance through the oval window directly across from where he sat, the tops of the trees covered in a white blanket of snow like frosting on cupcakes.
Sirius Black was content spending his time in Gryffindor Tower with the people he loved the most - his friends. Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew were seated on the floor in front of the couch facing the fire. James Potter and Lily Evans, still newly dating, sat close together on the couch.
“I can’t believe it’s already almost Christmas. Only a week left,” Lily was saying. She shifted on the couch, leaning into James’ chest a little more. Sirius looked at James and smiled; it had taken a lot for his friend to finally get where he was now, and Sirius was happy for him. James and Lily made a good couple; Sirius had always known Lily would come around eventually.
“Don’t remind me,” James groaned. “If it’s almost Christmas then it’s almost Sluggy’s Black and White Ball.” He paused and then let out a faint “Ow!” as Lily elbowed him in the ribs.
“What’s the matter, Prongs?” Sirius called, the smile widening as he poked fun at his friend.
“Don’t you want to show off your excellent dancing to your new girlfriend?”
“You shut it, Padfoot,” James replied, picking up one of the pillows from behind him and chucking it in Sirius’ direction. Sirius burrowed deeper into his armchair to avoid the flying pillow and laughed loudly.
“I was only joking, mate. No need to get violent.” He sat up straighter, though he was still slouching, legs spread lazily and his arms hanging over the sides of the armchair.
“What about you, Padfoot?” Peter suddenly spoke up from his place on the floor. He poked at the fire as he said, “Don’t you have a date yet?”
Shifting in his seat, Sirius sighed loudly. “The usual leeches keep dropping hints for me to ask them. At this point, though, I think I’m going to have to ask one of them.” He frowned, his eyebrows pulling together over his gray eyes.
Remus chuckled and said, “Why don’t you just go alone then, if you don’t want a date? It’s not like a date is required.”
Sirius cocked his head to the side, thinking about it for a moment. Remus was right; he didn’t have to have a date. But on the other hand, if he did…
“It isn’t a date that’s the problem, it’s finding the right girl,” Sirius finally replied.
It was silent for a moment until Lily sat up, pushing off James a bit. He looked up at her in confusion, holding her arm steady with a hand. Lily was looking past Sirius at the portrait hole, and Sirius knew from the creak of the hinges that it had opened; someone had entered. Lily turned back to him them, the light of an idea bright in her green eyes. Sirius knew that look, and it always made him anxious.
“Why not ask Waverly?” she whispered to him. “You two are good friends anyway, aren’t you? Then you would have a date, but it wouldn’t have to be someone you don’t like.”
Sirius sat a bit straighter, contemplating Lily’s words. Waverly Lennox… Lily was right; they were good friends. Not best mates by any means, but he enjoyed her company in Ancient Runes and Defense Against the Dark Arts. Maybe Lily had something there…
As he was contemplating, Waverly walked up to the couch behind Lily and James and stopped, smiling at them all and lifting her hand off the back of the couch in a gesture of greeting.
“Hey Waverly,” Lily chirped, sitting up all the way and crossing her legs on the couch. She turned her head and tilted her chin upwards to better talk to the blonde in front of her. “Why don’t you have a seat and join us?” Lily gestured toward the empty armchair across from Sirius. “We were just discussing the ball Slughorn is throwing on Friday night.” She paused for a moment before adding, “Do you have a date yet?”
Pushing a lock of her long blonde hair behind her right ear, Waverly answered, “Not yet, no.” In Waverly’s pause, Lily snuck a meaningful look at Sirius, eyes bright and smile wide. She cocked her head ever so slightly and Sirius wrinkled his nose. Lily Evans had never been very good at discreetness when she was trying to make a match.
“I’ll come and join you in a minute,” Waverly was saying now as she pulled off her mittens, and Sirius turned his attention back to her. She really wasn’t all that bad looking, now that he was thinking about it. Of about average height, she had a medium frame and a small face.
Strawberry blonde hair fell over her chest, straight as a pin and under a red trimmed with gold beanie that covered the top of her head and her ears. The eyes were a light blue-ish green, something Sirius had never noticed until just then, and her skin was a healthy golden color.
“I’m going to go up and put away these boots first. My feet are soaked and frozen,” Waverly finished. She chuckled slightly and then turned to head up the stairs.
Lily twisted around again and cocked her head in a much bigger motion than she had done before. “Go after her and ask!” she mouthed to him and then made a motion with her hands. It seemed Lily had more urgency than he did, and the thought caused Sirius to chuckle to himself.
Sirius considered for another moment as he watched Waverly walk away, the sway of her hips like hypnosis. Making his decision, he stood and started toward the stairs, jogging to catch her before she went up.
“Hey Lennox!” he called when she had stepped onto the first step of the staircase. She turned slowly, both feet on the step now so that their faces were level. She gave the smallest hint of a smile and placed a hand on the railing. Sirius watched it for a moment, the way the long delicate fingers curled around the rail, and then looked back up at her slightly puzzled face.
“Yes, Black?” she asked, tilting her head to the side and smiling a little wider.
Putting his hands in the pockets of his trousers, Sirius looked into her eyes. “I was just wondering if you might go to the dance with me… since you don’t have a date, and nor do I.” He paused, grinned lopsidedly, and added quickly, “I mean, as friends. It could be fun, don’t you think?”
Waverly looked at her boots, tugged on her scarf once or twice, and then looked up at him again. For a moment when she looked down, Sirius had been worried that she might say no, but the smile she was giving him now washed away any doubt.
“Sure,” she agreed with a soft chuckle. “I would love to.” She paused, the grin spreading as she said, “So long as you keep that Black charm hidden away. I mean, since we’re just going as friends and all.”
Sirius winked and grinned. “No promises,” he replied. Reaching up, he rubbed her shoulder lightly before turning away to head back toward the armchair, the smile refusing to leave his lips. He wasn’t entirely sure why the giddy feeling in his stomach had sprung up; Waverly Lennox was just a friend. A pretty friend, but still just a friend, he told himself. But his subconscious still found a way to sneak to the surface, whispering something in his head like the buzz of a fly, over and over.
For now.
~*~
The week passed quickly for Sirius with the Black and White Ball and Christmas Eve fast approaching. He saw Waverly a few times; they talked the most in Ancient Runes, as she sat beside him in that class. James’ parents sent them both new black dress robes for the occasion; he had been at the Potter house for over a year now and Noah and Sarah were more than happy to buy the extra robes. Sirius was like a son to them, they had said so themselves, and he could never express his gratitude enough for everything they did for him.
The night of the ball had the boys down in the common room awaiting their ladies. Even Peter had a date, Melody Keith; her white dress reached below her knees and her mousy brown hair was pulled up in a fancy twist. She was the first of the girls to come down, and Sirius and James had already exhausted their jokes by the time Lily and Remus’ date, Penelope Gold, came down together.
“Waverly’s coming, Sirius, she’s just putting the finishing touches on her hair,” Lily told him as she and James walked over. Lily looked pretty in her long white dress, her red hair done halfway up and curled, a choker of pearls at her neck. Their hands were entwined, and Sirius wondered vaguely how Waverly’s small hand would feel in his large one.
Lily’s whisper, closer now, pulled him out of his thoughts. “And she looks gorgeous, Black. I’m not sure you’ll be able to handle it.”
Sirius grinned, his head turned down and to the side toward Lily. “I think I’ll manage, Evans,” he said back.
“Oh yeah?” Lily asked, louder this time. She giggled and then finished, “We’ll see about that. She’s here.”
The sight that met his eyes when Sirius looked up caught him completely off guard, like he had crashed head on into a glass door that he had not seen. His breath caught in his throat, his chest constricted, and his stomach took one giant swoop all at once. Waverly was descending the staircase, but she did not look like the Waverly Lennox Sirius remembered. She did not look like the pretty friend he talked to in Ancient Runes or the girl in Defense that was dressed like all the others.
There was no other word for it - Waverly Lennox was stunning.
Her dress, like Lily’s, was floor-length, and the neckline dipped in just the right way. Her long strawberry blond hair was down but the fringe she usually had was pinned up and back, creating a small pouf at her hair line. Her skin seemed to shine, at least to Sirius, and he couldn’t seem to make his body do anything but watch her move until she was standing and speaking right in front of him.
“Sirius? Hello? Are you okay?” Waverly asked, her eyebrows pulled together slightly in her puzzlement. She snapped her fingers and then laughed softly. James, Peter, Remus, and Lily were snickering behind him, and Sirius shook himself into action, willing words to his mouth that still came too slow.
“Uh… yeah.” Reaching a hand up, he ruffled the back of his shaggy black hair, moving his hand up and down a few times before stilling it but not lowering it. “Yeah, I’m fine.” He paused, lowered his hand.
“Lennox, you look…”
“Gorgeous?” Lily broke in, leaning toward Sirius and grinning up at him, her expression classic Evans smug. Any other time that might have annoyed him, but Sirius didn’t have enough room for conflicting emotions. “I told you, Sirius,” Lily said, giggling again. “And she’s your date for Merlin’s sake. Call her Waverly, not Lennox.”
Sirius felt himself nodding but the action didn’t quite register. “Er… right,” he managed. “Waverly.” He caught himself still staring at her and quickly averted his eyes, looking down at the floor and putting his hands in the pockets of his robes. He still couldn’t believe this was the Waverly that he talked to on a daily basis, the Waverly he laughed with, the Waverly he was mates with and nothing more. This was the Waverly now pictured in his head in ways he was glad she could not see, in ways he had never before thought about her.
“Well, that’s everyone, isn’t it?” Lily asked the eight of them, breaking into Sirius’ thoughts. He was glad she could not see them, too.
“It isn’t fair,” Peter complained from his place beside the portrait hole with Melody.” You girls get to wear something different for a change, while we still have to wear these same stupid robes.” He tugged at the neckline of his own robes that were trimmed in a short lining of white lace.
“They aren’t the same, they’re dress robes,” Waverly said, turning her attention to him now. “There’s a difference, Peter. These are for special occasions.”
“Ruffles. Woo-hoo,” Peter replied, rolling his eyes and twirling the pointer finger of his free hand in a gesture of sarcastic excitement. “That makes me feel so much better, Waverly.”
Laughing, Sirius managed to add, “It’s all right, Wormtail. You look good in a little lace. You should consider wearing it more often.” He laughed a little harder and Waverly snickered as well, putting a hand over her mouth as she did.
“Ha-ha, Padfoot,” Peter grumbled, but didn’t say anything more.
When everyone was accounted for, Lily finished, “Shall we go, then?” James offered her his arm and she wound hers around it; Sirius did the same for Waverly. Her touch was warm even through the fabric of his robes, and Sirius tried not to concentrate on the heat slowly spreading through his body.
He could do this. She was still the same Waverly, the same mate he could joke with in class. It was just a ball, just a stupid Christmas ball thrown by Slughorn of all people. That was a thought he could hold onto, a thought that kept away the others - with his large stomach and his fake laugh and his constant lament over losing Sirius to Gryffindor house, Professor Slughorn was an effective killjoy.
If only he could hold onto it.
~*~
Slughorn had his Christmas Ball down in the dungeons, of course. The eight of them followed the small crowd to his office, which, Sirius realized upon entering, had been magically expanded. The room, which he had been in numerous times before, was hardly recognizable. There was a small dance floor in the middle of the room, and a line of rectangular tables along the right side wall laden with food and drinks. The band was on a platform against the wall opposite the door where they stood.
“I didn’t think Slughorn would have invited this many people,” James commented as the group made their way to one of the empty circular tables spaced out around the room.
“He didn’t,” Lily said from beside James. “Half these people are only here as dates.”
“Oh,” James stated, “right.” They reached the table, and he pulled out a chair for Lily before taking his own seat. Peter did the same for Melody, as did Remus for Penelope. Sirius hesitated before doing the same for Waverly; he was still feeling unnecessarily anxious, and it was starting to get on his nerves. She was just a girl for Merlin’s sake; why the hell was he acting so… unlike himself? Perhaps because she was a mate? A mate whose beauty he had not realized until she really put it on display. Whatever the reason, it was really starting to piss him off. His mouth felt dry, and he looked over to the punch bowl, deciding he needed a drink.
“I’m going to get some punch,” he told the table without taking a seat. Turning to Waverly, he asked, “Do you want anything, Len - er - Waverly?”
“Yeah, all right,” she answered, smiling up at him. “Thanks.”
“No problem,” he answered, grinning widely himself before starting around the table. When he reached James he pulled on the shoulder of his jacket. “You come with me,” he whispered with a tug. James came out of his seat rather haphazardly and muttered a jumbled “be right back” to Lily as the two boys started to leave.
As they walked, James straightened his coat and smoothed it down. “What’s up with you, Pads?”
They reached the punchbowl, and Sirius picked up the ladle and a cup. He hesitated, unsure what exactly he wanted to say. He had never been in this position before; it was usually James asking for advice, not Sirius.
Before he could say anything, however, James spoke up instead. “It’s Lennox, isn’t it?” He raised a knowing eyebrow and cracked a smug smile. Sirius frowned, annoyed that his friend found this amusing.
Catching his error, James composed his face and said, “Oh, stop pretending like you need my advice, Pads. Just do what you do.” The way James said it, it sounded so terrible. But Sirius didn’t know any other way.
“Oh, shut it, Prongs,” Sirius grumbled, looking over at their table again. Someone had said something funny and Waverly was laughing. For some reason, as he watched her, Sirius could hear that laugh the way he knew it would sound, and it stirred something in his stomach.
“See, don’t need my advice,” James commented as they started back, cups in hands.
When he and James got back to the table, Sirius still did not take a seat. The band had begun a new song, a slow song, and instead of sitting, Sirius took Waverly’s hand in his and made a show of bowing deeply before asking, “Miss Waverly Lennox, may I have this dance?” He grinned lopsidedly, the way he knew always worked, and winked.
Smiling, Waverly stood and let him lead her onto the floor. As they walked, she chuckled and whispered, “I thought I said not to put on the Black charm?”
Sirius snorted as they reached a good spot on the floor, turning her to face him. He placed a hand on her waist and gripped hers with the other, the grin still wide on his face. The feel of her body under his hand shot a pulse of electricity up his arm, but he tried to ignore it and feigned innocence to Waverly’s question.
“Who’s charming anyone?” he asked as they began to spin slowly. “I’m just being myself… I can’t help it if I’m charismatic.”
Waverly laughed, tilting her head back as she did. “I suppose you can’t help that you’re so arrogant either, can you?”
Sirius leaned in closer to her, their cheeks just barely brushing. The sensation made the hairs on his neck stand up, but in a good way. A very good way. “It’s part of the charm, love,” he whispered in her ear. She didn’t giggle, but Sirius could feel the heat rushing to her face and his grin widened a little more.
They danced that way until the song ended, and then Sirius pulled back only a little. Someone - Slughorn, perhaps - had put a spell on the ceiling of the dungeons so that it started to lightly snow, in just the same way that it was outdoors. It gave him an idea, and Sirius pulled away further, keeping hold of her hand and starting to lead her off the floor.
When he walked right past their table of friends, Waverly’s expression changed from polite curiosity to confusion. “Sirius, where-?”
“You’ll see,” he answered her before she could finish the question. Grinning to himself, he led her right out of the dungeon and headed for the nearest staircase.
~*~
Outside, the night was black but the stars were bright, twinkling on the dark canvas. It was lightly snowing and Waverly reached out a hand to catch a snowflake.
“It’s so pretty,” she commented, lifting her head a bit to catch the snow on her face. She opened her mouth and caught a few before giggling looking down again.
“I know,” Sirius agreed, taking his hands out of his robe pockets. He came up behind her and pulled her to him, knowing she must be cold in that white dress. She turned in his arms, smiling up at him, and Sirius felt his heart clench. Friends, his arse. Whatever her feelings, that was out the window for him.
“Cold,” she said quietly, looking down at his chest, blushing slightly. Sirius leaned against her some more, breathing her in. She titled her head back up to look at him, and Sirius took his chance, slowly closing the gap between them until their lips met softly. It was tentative at first, testing the boundaries and feeling the waters. Then, Sirius kissed her a little harder, a little needier, and then she was deepening it further before he’d even tried, opening herself to him.
After a few moments they pulled apart, breathing heavily as their hearts and their lungs tried to catch up. It was quiet until Waverly’s voice broke it with a shake-y question.
“Sirius… what are we doing?”
“I thought we were snogging,” Sirius joked against her lips. They felt soft and comfortable as he talked against them, but she pulled back a little more.
“No, I mean… we’re friends. I can’t - I won’t - I’m not one of your little adventures. I don’t want to ruin what we already have.” She paused, looked down at their entwined fingers, melting away a few snowflakes just for something to do. “That came out wrong,” she started again. “I didn’t mean to suggest - I just, I don’t know… Merlin, Sirius, you ma-”
Before she could finish any train of thought, Sirius silenced her with his lips, pulling her body closer to his again. He let his body melt into hers, could feel his nervous system going haywire and it felt so bloody good.
When they separated against, Sirius said, “I know, Wave, I know.” He paused, taking a deep breath before continuing, “I just like to live in the moment. Can’t you live with me?”
She was silent for a moment, and he could feel the tension of her body in his arms until she finally relaxed, letting herself go, falling into him. He groaned with relief and arousal.
“I think I could do that,” she whispered, looking up straight into his eyes, her gaze unwavering before the lids closed and she brought her lips to his again.
~*~
You are not sure why you can hold onto this, to her. To that night, to all those nights afterward, all those years. You don’t know the reasons she’s held fast to your mind like a toxin laced in your blood, binding to you.
Did you love her? Maybe.
The years following that first Christmas are hazy, lost to the endless suction of the terrible creatures that guard your cell. But that one night is engrained in your mind with such clarity it often physically hurts, your muscles clenching and your chest constricting. The memory so real you can almost touch her, taste her.
It hurts the most because you know you can’t.
The Dementors are still there, agitated, you can tell. Their rattling breath gets louder as they suck harder, trying and still failing to take that one last memory from you. It only angers them further and you know that tomorrow you will pay. They should know by now, but they won’t give up, won’t ever give up.
Yet you smile to yourself despite everything else, because you know they will never succeed.
Every Christmas, every year. In the most desolate place in the Wizarding world, you still have that Christmas and you still have her, and they cannot take her away. You have been able to hold onto her.
You will always have Waverly Lennox.