A Little Down Time

[spencer5460]

I'm feeling a little discouraged tonight.

Comments

[myhnabird]

I doubt that it's a matter of "trying harder", Spencer. Surely, there must be parts of the job that you do well and that you feel comfortable with. Do you get on with any of your coworkers? Try to focus on the positive, hun. And think about how far you've come from the bundle of nerves you were a year ago.

Hm... maybe this should've been a private message....

[spencer5460]

Some days I feel competent and other days I feel like, "what the hell am I doing?" Then I get discouraged because at this point in my life I should be running circles around the young whipper snappers. It's a little odd to have to answer to someone who is the same age as my son. But then again, they're attorneys so it's not like a typical chain of command. I think I get on well with everyone but other people are so much more self-assured than I am. How have I arrived at this age still lacking confidence?

Thanks, hon. We'll just keep swimming. . .

[provencepuss]

take heart; things fall into place. We have rented out our independent studio/guest room to a young woman who is embarking on a new personal voyage asa holistic therapist Yesterday she asked me to 'beta' her business card before sending the ok to Vistaprint; she created the e-mail address a year ago...it includes this village name although she had no idea at the time that she would get to live here;
Follow your inner voice;

[spencer5460]

That is awesome! (Although I wish it would have been me to have rented out your guest room.) Your advice is coming at the right time. My daughter is considering taking a position as an independent sales rep. for an equine products company. Jumping into a commission-based position is extremely scary but it's something she has contemplated for awhile. Hopefully, our hearts will not lead us astray. <3

[samudee]

Don't be too hard on yourself. Sometimes you don't get what you want or what you think you want because there's something else that's so much better waiting for you. And some times you have to go through bad situations (people, jobs) to appreciate the good one when it comes your way. This has been my experience. Hang in there, Spence! Listen to your heart. Try to understand what you really would like to do and then work towards that goal.

[provencepuss]

listen to your heart and listen to your soul (and have the wisdom to tell you mind the STFU :D )

[spencer5460]

Thanks, sweetie. It's not exactly a bad situation I'm facing but rather a lack of confidence and lack of belief in myself. As they say in "On the Waterfront" - "I could have been a contender!" I only I was smarter. :(

If we stick together will get to the light at the end of the tunnel.

[samudee]

You are way way wayyyy smarter than you give yourself credit for. Have faith, Spence!

[taass64]

I agree with Sammy, don't be hard on yourself. Changing jobs is extremely hard, extremely emotionally taxing, and at this time in our lives, even more so because we have so many life changes and hormonal changes and health changes. Give yourself, instead, credit, for being brave enough to start a new job. Give yourself positive reinforcement of the power you have to make changes. And you have made a LOT of them in the last year. Plus a job is a job. You are a kind, generous, loving, spiritual, talented, supportive person. That's what matters after all.

[spencer5460]

Thanks for the pep talk! You guys are the greatest. And right back at you! PS I think we should have a sharecon meetup at least once a month. Sounds like we could all use it!

[hardboiledbaby]

I've started to comment several times, but I can't seem to put my thoughts down in words that don't sound stupid. Maybe I'll just say that I can relate to your struggles about making 'dumb little mistakes' and feeling as though I haven't made progress. For me, I think it's not that I'm not trying hard enough, but maybe that I'm not trying hard enough at the right things, or in the right ways.

Be kind to yourself. We're often our own worst critic. The accomplishment of others can be both encouraging and disheartening, and sometimes they blind us to our own achievements, which are less shiny to us. As for being a disappointment to others, well. Their expectations are their problem. (I know, easy for me to say. This is something I wrestle with daily. But they really are.)

Okay, words are starting to sound stupid, so I'll stop. *hugs*

[spencer5460]

Thanks for that. We do belong to that group of people who are they're own worst critics. We can relate. It's so hard to change the way the brain is wired. It's a daily battle. I guess we'll just keep swimming.