Relatives and Travel Rant
"There ain't no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them." - Mark Twain
Mark Twain knows all. This past week has reminded me all too well why I tend to regret trips to Illinois. Packing up frantically the night before with all the griping and the scurrying, wake up early and shove all of the last minutes things in the back of the SUV while stressing out about this and that, finally get down the road and be confined to a moving rumbling cage incarcerated with family and having no escape from all their annoying anecdotes and everything that sets off your pet peeves boils to the surface all the while having to endure the wind, sound, and acrid smell that entails these chain smokers always rolling down the windows to get their fix. ALL THAT for sixteen hours in a row before arriving at the destination being shoved off onto an uncomfortable air bed with a hole in it that goes flat during the night. THEN I had to wake up and begin the cycle of being subject to people I am not familiar with and having to shoot the breeze like we're neighbors. Being subject to the spawn of my elder cousins; having to communicate on a level of morbidly basic intelligence and having to endure the searing cries of babies and toddlers. Having to sit idly by while Mom deliberately sells the most embarrassing and demeaning stories of my failings that shouldn't really be told in some cheap ploy to deflect her own shortcomings. Having to respond to the same series of questions about my age, my current situation in life, and what I intend to do in the near future over and over and over again. Having to censor my own thoughts to prevent myself for dropping any profanities around Victorian ears. My uncle occasionally ordering me around like he has authority over me, instead of asking me nicely like a host would do to a guest. Attending the wedding in the most uncomfortable way possible: in uncomfortable clothes, being exposed to more babies bitching and whining, having to hear Christian wedding tripe I don't agree with, being starved by lunch being postponed until after 5pm when breakfast was at 8am, and most of all being imprisoned at the wedding reception for entirely too many hours with no escape. Being delayed our exodus a day more "just because". AND THEN AGAIN being shoved back into the cage again and having to deal with each other with our already frayed nerves. Mom's mental condition decaying into an almost bipolar-esqe mood swing state ranging from road rage to sappy stories about how she deserves pity because my brother and I are soon to be leaving home despite the fact that ever since my brother and I turned 16 she's been harping at us to quickly grow up and GTFO ASAP at any given moment, and now that we've taken the initiate to get going and make our own way she acts as though she deserves PITY?!
I am so thoroughly relieved that this insane little road trip is over with. Finally I can be myself again and do the things that keep me sane while preparing for my future on my own terms. I can sleep in my own bed, I can play WoW again, I can think my own thoughts and control what audio goes in my head again. I even regain the liberty to satisfy my sexual energies again instead of repressing myself in my relative's house like some kind of celibate monk.
In all, I need a vacation from the vacation.
As a disclaimer, I don't hate my family. I don't begrudge my relatives for having weddings that demand my presence. I know that my relatives wouldn't ask about my life if they didn't care about me, and I know it sure takes a lot of generosity to open one's home to out of state relatives for a straight week. I appreciate the good things I got out of the trip. I just draw the line when my nerves are completely shot from culture shock. I'm just sooo satisfied to be back home again.
Mark Twain knows all. This past week has reminded me all too well why I tend to regret trips to Illinois. Packing up frantically the night before with all the griping and the scurrying, wake up early and shove all of the last minutes things in the back of the SUV while stressing out about this and that, finally get down the road and be confined to a moving rumbling cage incarcerated with family and having no escape from all their annoying anecdotes and everything that sets off your pet peeves boils to the surface all the while having to endure the wind, sound, and acrid smell that entails these chain smokers always rolling down the windows to get their fix. ALL THAT for sixteen hours in a row before arriving at the destination being shoved off onto an uncomfortable air bed with a hole in it that goes flat during the night. THEN I had to wake up and begin the cycle of being subject to people I am not familiar with and having to shoot the breeze like we're neighbors. Being subject to the spawn of my elder cousins; having to communicate on a level of morbidly basic intelligence and having to endure the searing cries of babies and toddlers. Having to sit idly by while Mom deliberately sells the most embarrassing and demeaning stories of my failings that shouldn't really be told in some cheap ploy to deflect her own shortcomings. Having to respond to the same series of questions about my age, my current situation in life, and what I intend to do in the near future over and over and over again. Having to censor my own thoughts to prevent myself for dropping any profanities around Victorian ears. My uncle occasionally ordering me around like he has authority over me, instead of asking me nicely like a host would do to a guest. Attending the wedding in the most uncomfortable way possible: in uncomfortable clothes, being exposed to more babies bitching and whining, having to hear Christian wedding tripe I don't agree with, being starved by lunch being postponed until after 5pm when breakfast was at 8am, and most of all being imprisoned at the wedding reception for entirely too many hours with no escape. Being delayed our exodus a day more "just because". AND THEN AGAIN being shoved back into the cage again and having to deal with each other with our already frayed nerves. Mom's mental condition decaying into an almost bipolar-esqe mood swing state ranging from road rage to sappy stories about how she deserves pity because my brother and I are soon to be leaving home despite the fact that ever since my brother and I turned 16 she's been harping at us to quickly grow up and GTFO ASAP at any given moment, and now that we've taken the initiate to get going and make our own way she acts as though she deserves PITY?!
I am so thoroughly relieved that this insane little road trip is over with. Finally I can be myself again and do the things that keep me sane while preparing for my future on my own terms. I can sleep in my own bed, I can play WoW again, I can think my own thoughts and control what audio goes in my head again. I even regain the liberty to satisfy my sexual energies again instead of repressing myself in my relative's house like some kind of celibate monk.
In all, I need a vacation from the vacation.
As a disclaimer, I don't hate my family. I don't begrudge my relatives for having weddings that demand my presence. I know that my relatives wouldn't ask about my life if they didn't care about me, and I know it sure takes a lot of generosity to open one's home to out of state relatives for a straight week. I appreciate the good things I got out of the trip. I just draw the line when my nerves are completely shot from culture shock. I'm just sooo satisfied to be back home again.