Rating: NC-17
Pairings: Winsister/Castiel, Winsister/Ruby, Winsister/Dean, Winsister/Sam, Winsister/Adam (in a dream), Sam/Castiel/Dean
Dates: Written September 2010
Word Count: 35,896
Summary: Winsister AU. The hunting life isn't easy on anyone. For Kerry Winchester, it may be too much. The worst, though, was being in love with a multi-dimensional wavelength that may not ever love her back.
Warnings: Spoilers for most of season 4 and the first few episodes of season 5. Incest, Het, Femmeslash, and Slash. Sex venom (similar to sex pollen), dub-con, brief non-con, fisting, sex toys, vanilla bondage, use of the Bible in a way that some would probably consider blasphemy, simulated scarfing, and mention of underage Wincest. This is not the "nice" Ruby from season 4, but Ruby with her season 3 personality, and then some. She is very much a demon. In fact, I imagine the Ruby in this story looking like Katie Cassidy all the way through.
Beta Thanks: Thanks as always to Sammie for the wonderful beta!
Author's Notes: Title comes from the Tori Amos song "Mother." Abridged version of a longer story (which I'll eventually write out to the end).
Chapter 7: Jumping on the Grenade
Word Count this Chapter: 3,249
The venom working on every aspect of her being, Kerry's dream of Adam changed.
This time when she rushes into the house, the ghoul has Adam down on the floor, opening his pants and taking his cock into her mouth. Kerry watches the creature suck him off as if she is frozen in place. She then crouches down next to him and reaches behind her to unzip the dress she is wearing; it's a light summer dress she doesn't have anymore, not for five years now. Kerry takes down the straps. His face marked with arousal, Adam reaches for her, and she leans down to kiss him. Adam's hand cups her naked breast.
Kerry awoke with a horrified gasp. Once she realized where she was, she turned on her side in the bed and began to cry. What this shit was doing to her...
Sam immediately came into the room. Dean had a hold of one of his arms, but Sam shook it off. "She's been asleep three hours. Maybe it's worn off," he said, and moved over to the side of the bed. He couldn't stand to hear her cry like that, deep, mournful sobs. "Hey Kerry, you okay?"
"No," she wailed. Kerry curled into a ball under the sheet. "This stuff is fucking with my head, fucking with my head."
Sam dared to stroke back her hair. "So it hasn't worn off?"
She took a moment to do a self-inventory of how her body was feeling. "I know it's still affecting me, but right now I'm just sore."
Sam didn't want to talk about why. "Do you want to try to eat?"
"Yeah. And use the bathroom."
Kerry wrapped the sheet around herself and attempted to get out of bed, but her legs collapsed under her when she tried to stand. Sam helped her up, supporting her weight while they walked to the bathroom. He sat her on the toilet and waited outside the door. For his own part, Dean hovered behind them, ready to do what he had to if Kerry went crazy again.
"Where's Ruby?" Kerry asked.
"She left a few hours ago. Went to see if she could get us something to help."
"Damn bitch lied to me. Said I could be on top once," Kerry mumbled to herself. Inside, she was ashamed of how she'd let Ruby treat her.
"What?"
"Nothing." Of course, Kerry was even more ashamed of the fact that she'd let Ruby do it all again if it meant getting off further.
"Dean, go get her some of that casserole I fixed."
"It's not a good idea that I leave you two alone."
"I can handle her."
Giving Sam a look, Dean reluctantly went to get his sister a plate of food.
Sam helped Kerry back to the bed. Dean, returning to the room, breathed a sigh of relief when he didn't find his sister climbing his brother like a vine. Feeling weak and sad, Kerry let Sam feed her while she laid back in the bed, always just on the verge of tears.
"It will be alright. The stuff must be wearing off, Kerry; you're not attacking anyone," he pointed out. Sam put the almost empty plate on the nightstand and rubbed away one of her tears with his thumb. "Please don't cry."
She wanted very badly for someone to hold her, but was afraid to try it. A sudden wave of arousal at the feeling of Sam touching her face only gave her more reason to pull away. "Oh, no. It's starting again," Kerry groaned, and curled back into her ball. When the arousal turned to pain, she howled into the pillow. "Make it stop, God, make it stop!"
Sam hurt for her. "Get my cell phone. Call Ruby and see how far away she is."
Jumping up, Dean rushed to get the phone.
Kerry slowly uncurled her body. Her hand came out from under the sheet and snaked up Sam's thigh. "I can't... do this!" she growled at herself. "Stop. Stop!"
Sam realized she was yelling at herself, not him. "It's alright. We'll get Ruby here as soon as possible." In that moment, he made a decision, and took her by the arms. "Sit up. Sit up, Kerry."
She was sitting up just as Dean came back. "It's ringing." He listened for a moment. Eventually, Dean frowned and began to talk. "Ruby, where are you? Call us back, now. Kerry's awake. It's starting again. Get back here." He hung up. "She's letting it go to voicemail."
For all the times Ruby had been able to fool Sam in the past, he had no fantasies about her innocence this time; she was making them wait on purpose. Why, probably to have a little fun at Kerry and Dean's expense, as they had always been at odds with the demon. He would deal with Ruby later. Now, his sister needed his help. "Dean, you should leave the room."
"Why? What are you doing?"
"Let me take care of this, okay?" Sam put Kerry's arms around his neck. She just looked at him at first, bewildered.
Dean quickly realized what Sam meant to do. "Sammy, no. Ruby will call back any minute."
"No, she won't."
Kerry started to rub Sam's chest through his shirt. Her eyes grew hungry with desire. But suddenly, she stopped, on the verge of tears. "No, no, I can't. I can't."
"It's okay, Kerry. Go ahead," Sam said quietly, and added, "I won't let you suffer." He took hold of her face and kissed her soundly on the mouth.
Kerry's hands just hung in mid-air, her body caught between wanting to let go and resisting the urge to ravage her little brother.
Horrified, Dean pried them apart. Kerry instantly pulled back, a hand to her mouth, and just panted there on the bed while Dean dragged Sam toward the door.
"I can't let you do this, Sammy," he said.
"I've already made my decision! I can handle it, Dean," Sam replied.
"Yeah, well I can't let you jump on this grenade." Dean shoved Sam out into the hall. "I'm the oldest. It's my job." He closed the door and locked it.
Shocked, Sam pounded on the door. "Dean! Damn it! Open up!"
"It's my job, Sam, not yours," Dean called through the door. "Please, just go away."
"Dean!" Sam kept pounding for a little longer, and then finally gave up, taking a seat in the hall with his head in his hands.
Dean tried to put on a smile when he turned back to his sister. "Hey Kerry," he said, "it's gonna be okay."
The sheet had loosened and fallen down in places; Kerry tried to wrap it around her naked body again. "No one's jumping on this grenade, Dean. You get out too."
"Can't do that, sis." He approached the bed. "Sam's right, you're suffering."
"It doesn't matter. I did this to myself, I deserve it."
"Oh, you know we can't accept that." Dean took off his shirt.
She tried not to look at him. "Dean, please don't." Kerry's voice broke with emotion.
He sat on the edge of the bed. "We can get past this."
When he took her by the arms and pulled her onto his lap, Kerry began to cry. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she wept. "I fuck everything up so bad."
"Shhhh. It hurts my feelings when women cry while I'm..." Dean couldn't finish that sentence, couldn't say it that way, even if it was a joke. Making love to them. "Remember when we were teenagers and Dad would leave us alone for weeks, and we would experiment with each other? Practicing kissing and giving head and stuff? This is just like that."
"No it isn't. It's totally different."
"Shh, stop talking about it," Dean said, kissing the side of her head.
"The Winchester way. Don't discuss it, just do it." A spike of pain stabbed Kerry in the gut, and she wailed.
"Works for me."
Kerry tried one last thing. "Castiel... will come at any... minute."
"We can't rely on that." He felt her arms going around him, heard her breath coming out in pants. Dean took hold of the sheet and pulled it down. Kerry whimpered. "Relax, it's okay." With that, he kissed her softly and laid her back on the bed.
When Dean moved down, his mouth poised over her breast, she began apologizing again. "I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry, Dean..."
He crawled back up the bed and looked her in the eyes. "Stop it."
"I can't," Kerry wept.
"Then close your eyes if you have to."
That seemed to work. She nodded, putting a hand over her face and closing her eyes, shaking with sobs.
"You realize this isn't doing anything for my ego," Dean joked, and crawled a little ways back down the bed.
Kerry tried to be strong. This was really going to happen, and it would be easier for both of them if she didn't sob her way through it. "You think I give a shit about your ego by now?" she said with a small, shaky laugh.
Dean sighed, relieved to hear her joke back. "Not really."
The first touch of his lips to her nipple and Kerry made a frightened noise.
Pleasing women was something at which Dean had a lot of experience; he approached it from that perspective. They weren't that much different from men in that they liked certain things to be sucked and other things to be touched, and then switch and repeat until foreplay is over. Dean could be like a machine if she needed him to be. Don't get emotionally involved, just do the job. But after a minute of sucking her tits, Kerry began to make noises, different noises. These sounds were harder to hear, because they came from pleasure.
When they were teens, Dean loved to hear those sounds; it meant he was doing it right. This time, it was weird. He didn't allow himself to think about it, and reached down to stroke her clit.
Kerry squirmed underneath him. When her moans became particularly needy and desperate, Dean began to undo his pants.
He simply pushed them down and off, along with his underwear, suddenly wondering if she'd even be able to feel it or if it would hurt after what Ruby had done to her. "If it... hurts... you tell me, okay? I'll stop. We don't have to... if it hurts, we can just do other stuff."
Unsure of why Dean was saying these things, Kerry just nodded. Her eyes were open now, and she kept them on his face as he laid himself between her legs.
He realized that he wasn't really hard. It wasn't something he even thought about when it came to sex - Little Big Dean never seemed to have any trouble with it when a naked girl was around. But this was no regular naked girl. Dean's emotions were too wrapped up in what he was doing, who he was doing it to. He decided to do what he could to get himself excited. Maybe lots of kissing would do it; Dean didn't have to look her in the eyes when he was kissing her.
He slipped his cock between her wet pussy lips, rubbing the head of it over her clit. She gasped in ecstasy. Dean bucked his hips so his cock would slide up and down over the quivering little knob and her lips would stroke him down at the same time. Kerry arched her back, her eyes closed, little sounds escaping her. While he waited, Dean planted kisses on her mouth, which she eventually returned. By the time his cock got hard, they were kissing deeply.
Dean lifted his hips to reposition himself; the motion told Kerry what he was about to do and she whimpered. "Don't you start crying again," he said, half-joking and half-serious.
"I won't." Her voice shook. "Dean, I'm sorry you have to - "
"If you apologize to me one more time..." He had to think about it, but came up with nothing. "...well I don't know what I'll do. But once I figure it out, I'll let you know."
Kerry had to laugh, her hand to her eyes. Dean took advantage of the moment to slide himself inside her. She gasped, arching her head into the pillow.
"Are you okay? Does it hurt?"
Kerry was a bit sore from the waist down, but once Dean was inside her, a great heat swept up and down her body and the pain didn't matter. The incubus venom still moved through her system. It was strong. "No, I'm okay. I mean, yes. I mean..." Kerry shivered deliciously all over. "It's good."
"Okay." Dean wished it wasn't so awkward, but it was. He just had to pretend they were teenagers again, with the reckless abandon of kids that age. It would help if she'd stop looking at him with those big, searching eyes. Huffing out a breath, Dean buried his face in her neck and began to thrust.
Within a minute, Kerry was clutching him to her, one hand squeezing his ass and the other cradling his head. Dean's muscular back flexed with his movements. He didn't want to make any noise, but she couldn't help but moan each time he slid deep inside.
It seemed to take her a long time to climax. Dean did his best to hold out. Nearing the threshold of his stamina, a sudden, horrible thought crawled across his mind. "You took your... pill today, didn't you?" he panted.
"Uh huh," Kerry answered.
Dean sighed with relief; it came out as a breathless huff. "Good." He almost continued, saying that he wished he had a condom too, but he thought it would worry her, and kept it to himself.
Unable to hold it back, Dean moaned helplessly when he came inside her.
At this point, there usually would be the post-sex cool down and lounging in the bed until they both felt like doing it again, but he knew that wouldn't work in this case. Kerry hadn't orgasmed yet. Dean kept thrusting in an effort to keep himself aroused, reaching down and rubbing her clit aggressively at the same time. Shortly after, she mewled and came.
He knew it wasn't over, though. Kerry just kept clutching him, holding his ass down like she wanted more.
As if she read his mind, she said, "There's some relief when I cum, but then it just starts all over again."
"Okay. It's okay," Dean replied.
He used a few different positions, hoping one would satisfy her completely. Straight missionary. Doggie style. Letting her get on top. Although that one seemed to be the most enjoyable for her, Kerry still began to buck her hips again only seconds after she'd cum.
The fifth time, Dean turned her over on her back and hooked his elbows around her knees, lifting her up and spreading her open, her ankles dangling out to the side. He'd always found this to be a good position for really hard fucking. From this angle, Kerry's channel was raised enough for him to push down into it, sliding in deep, and deliver hard, fast, pile-driving thrusts. Dean braced himself on the bed and went to it, unable to keep from grunting over how good it felt. His ass and back flexed athletically with every motion.
Bearing down on her like that, Dean had all the control, and Kerry gladly turned it over to him. She moaned and squealed in ecstasy at how deep he could penetrate her in this position. Within a minute, Kerry had already had two small orgasms.
At the third, hardest one, she shook all over and cried out his name. "Dean!" Kerry moaned. It wasn't something she had planned to do, but the climax was so good that she couldn't control herself.
She was sloppy wet by this time, and Dean could hear his movements making hot, dirty noises, something that had always turned him on beyond belief. Less than ten seconds after Kerry had cried his name, he also came with a loud snarl.
Dean slumped to the bed beside her, letting her legs fall and just lying there, panting, exhausted. It didn't take long for her to be on him again. Kissing his neck, rubbing his stomach. "Oh... fuck," he groaned.
Dean's eyes momentarily rolled up into his head when Kerry began stroking his cock. She was trying to get him hard again. "Kerr, I... I don't think I can," he lamented, almost whining. Five times in a row, especially with almost no recovery period, was too much for any man.
"You can do it," Kerry assured, and massaged his balls.
"Boy, you sure aren't having any second thoughts about this anymore," he joked.
Kerry moved to put her mouth on his cock and the first touch of her tongue caused such a jolt in him that the muscles in his upper thigh spasmed, where the thigh met the hip. It was painful. "Goddamn it," Dean ground out between gritted teeth. When the cramp didn't stop, he rolled off the bed and stood up.
"Please come back," Kerry begged.
Dean tried to walk the cramp off; he hobbled around the room. "I'm sorry, Kerry. I need a break. You killed my dick."
Growling, she jumped up and chased him to the door. "You can't go!" They played a brief game of tug o' war with his arm. "Please, Dean, I need you!"
"I know you do, but I also know when I'm spent, Kerry. I'm sorry."
She started to block his way, but the pain returned, and she was on the floor, curled into a wailing ball within seconds. It hurt him to see her like that. Dean bent down to kiss the side of her head. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, sweetheart." He grabbed his underwear and left the room.
Sam had been lying on his side on the couch, an anguished look on his face, his cell phone clutched in his hand. When he heard Dean coming down the hall, he quickly sat up. Dean had put on his underwear and was holding the spot that had cramped up; by the time he got to the living room, he could only collapse into a chair, wincing.
"She's screaming again," Sam said, worried.
"I know." Dean indicated his crotch. "It's dead."
"You gotta rest?"
"Yeah. Got a muscle cramp. Not the obvious one, although..." Dean winced at the pain again.
Sam stood up. "Ruby won't call back." Taking a deep breath, he put his phone in Dean's hand. "Let me know if she calls, or if Castiel shows up. I'm going in."
"Sammy, no."
"I was ready to do it before and I'm still ready now. Let me help, Dean. You can't stop me this time."
From his chair, Dean just panted and held his thigh; he knew there wasn't a thing he could do to change Sam's mind. He just wasn't used to allowing his little brother to jump on the grenade as well. "Do whatever you feel you need to, Sam."
With a nod, Sam headed toward the hall. He stopped long enough to give Dean a hard punch in the arm. "That's for throwing me out and locking the door."
"I guess I deserved that," he responded, and leaned back in the chair, closing his eyes.
*****
Chapter 8: Sheltering Wing
Word Count this Chapter: 3,560
Sam found Kerry curled up on the carpet near the door. He instantly peeled his shirt off. "Kerry? Come on, you're a mess. Let's go take a bath, okay?"
"Bath?" She panted hard several times. "Ohhh, a bath would be nice."
"Yeah, come on, let's take a nice, hot bath." Sam put her arm around his neck and scooped her up.
It didn't occur to her what might happen until he'd carried her into the bathroom and laid her down on the floor. Kerry watched her brother turn on the water and adjust the temperature. "As soon as there's some water in here, we'll get in."
Silent a few moments longer, she watched as he removed his bandages so they wouldn't get wet. The stitches stood out plainly on his arms. It hurt to see him so injured, but the idea of him doing this for her hurt even more. "Sam, you're not coming in the tub with me."
"Yes I am," he stated firmly.
The realization hit her all at once and she put her hands over her face. "No, no, no, not with you, not with my little Sammy," Kerry wept.
He took her in his arms and held her, stroking her hair. At first, she tried to push away, but eventually just gave in. "It's okay, Kerry. I know what I'm doing, and I'm not so little anymore." Sam took her hand. "See me as you did through the effects of the venom. I'm not your little brother, I'm just a man." Hoping it would entice her, he moved her hand around in circles on his upper chest, where he was muscular and firm. "I want you to touch me."
Mesmerized, Kerry fondled and squeezed him, then laid her head on his chest. "Please forgive me for this, Sammy. I'm sorry for what I'm making you do," she said, her eyes closed.
"What? Of course I'll forgive you." Sam took her face in his hands and lifted her head so she'd look at him. "I don't know why you drank that stuff, but I won't leave you alone to suffer. We do whatever is needed to get each other through things like this."
"This is a bit too much for a sister to ask of her brother," Kerry replied with a shake of her head.
"You didn't ask, I volunteered."
"Oh yeah, and I attacked you earlier," she reminded him.
"You couldn't help it." Sam cleared his throat. "Um, why did you drink that stuff anyway? Did you think it would make you stronger?"
"No, I... I wanted to forget all the painful things we've been through lately. I just... couldn't deal, Sammy." She spoke one more painful word; it was all she had to say to make him understand. "Adam."
"Oh... oh, Kerry." He hugged her to him and let her cry while the tub finished filling up with water. "Hey, time to get in. Tub's full."
Shucking the rest of his clothes, Sam climbed in and turned, extending a helping hand to her too. When Kerry tried to go to the other end of the tub, he gently took her by the arm and coaxed her onto his lap, facing him.
Kerry immediately felt his cock brush her between the legs; she looked away from him in shame. "I can't believe I put you in this position." Even as she was saying that, her body was betraying her, hips pressing her down on him in a water lapdance. Sam let out a small moan of pleasure. "I... I can't stop myself," Kerry said, grinding on him more aggressively. The rounded tip of his arousal slid over her clit and back down again; the pull on his cockhead made him close his eyes and moan loudly. "Oh God, Sam, please don't stop loving me," she begged, beginning to cry once more.
"Impossible," Sam whispered, and pulled her face down to his, their lips brushing. "No matter what happens, I will never stop loving you." With that, he kissed her passionately on the mouth.
Sam took his cock in one hand and her hip in the other, guiding Kerry into the right position. "Go down real slow," he said.
It struck her that he wasn't treating this like a chore, but a pleasure. After what Sam was willing to do for her, Kerry wasn't going to question it. She slid down on him slow and easy, feeling every inch of him as he glided up inside her. They both closed their eyes and breathed out in ecstasy.
Sam held Kerry's sides as she began to move up and down; when she tried to go fast, he said, "No no no, no no," holding her down briefly until she stopped. "Go slow. Please."
Kerry answered by using a much slower rhythm. It allowed them to feel much more of it on an intimate level, warm skin sliding against skin. The water didn't affect their traction as much as she thought it might. For a while, Sam just laid back against the end of the tub with his eyes closed to slits, panting and moaning, not at all ashamed or afraid to show how much it pleasured him. He ran his hands over her breasts, caressing the nipples with his thumbs. Somehow, his attitude toward this act made her feel less self-conscious, and when Sam cradled her face with one hand, Kerry took it to her mouth, kissing his palm and then the pad of his thumb.
A small orgasm swept through her. "Sam," she mewled. It was almost like they were lovers.
This wasn't the time to be analyzing what was going on between them, but a few thoughts flitted across Kerry's mind, about how Sam was the youngest, or at least the youngest of the three children who were brought up together. His older siblings had been conditioned to take care of him, and he had been conditioned to take from them, to seek safety under their sheltering wing. But Sammy had always been more sensitive than that, offering things in return. The prize from the cereal box. The last cupcake. Love, understanding, and a bit of idol worship. Somehow, viewed in that context, Kerry understood why this was so intimate for him. There had always been a special, protective bond between the two of them that wasn't any less strong than the one she had with Dean, just different.
Soon, he was gripping her hips and pushing her down in a quicker rhythm than before, trying to go in deeper. The water in the tub churned around them. Kerry held on to Sam's shoulders, using them for leverage. She was unable to keep from moaning and crying out with his every upward thrust.
Caught up in their lovemaking, they both began to pant each other's names.
"Mmm, Kerry!" He cradled her face in his hand again.
She put her hand over his, rubbing her cheek against it and intertwining their fingers. "Sammy," she moaned helplessly.
Grunting and panting through his teeth, Sam pushed himself as deep within her as he could get, and came. The forceful motion brought Kerry to a second, harder orgasm. They spent a minute clutching one another, panting, moaning through it until the pleasure had faded. Sam enveloped her in his arms and she laid herself on his chest.
Dropping a kiss on her head, he asked, "How do you feel?"
"Not sure yet."
"We'll wait it out, then. See if your symptoms return."
That was an interesting way to refer to her desire to have sex with everyone in sight. 'Symptoms.' Kerry sighed. "Yeah."
Sam grabbed the shampoo off the little shelf next to the bathtub. "Let me wash your hair."
She laughed. "Sam, I can do it myself."
"But, can't I do it?" He frowned, looking especially boyish. "I just want to."
"Only if I can wash yours," Kerry chuckled back.
Sam grinned. "Okay."
The shelf next to the tub also contained a large cup, which he filled with water and poured over her head. She used her hands to work in the water while he watched it flow down over her naked body. Once Kerry's hair was sufficiently wet, she got him to lean up enough for her to douse his head, both of them laughing but not really knowing why, not at first. They both poured a small pool of shampoo into one hand and lathered up the other's head. That only brought on more chuckling. Kerry took the shampoo and squeezed it over Sam's head, drawing a spiral of blue in his soapy hair just for fun, and then lathered it up some more.
"You remember how when we were real little, we'd take a bath together?" she asked.
"Yeah. Eventually we got too old for it, but I do remember being about four and sharing a tub with you. That must've been hard for a single father, bathtime with three young kids."
"I can imagine." Kerry began to laugh harder. "Remember Dean was supposed to watch us, make sure we got behind the ears and shit, and he'd turn it into the entertainment hour?"
Laughing too, Sam nodded. "I still have no idea where he got all those dirty songs at such a young age."
While continuing to soap up his head, she bobbed her head back and forth in tune with the song she began to sing. "Oh I wish I was a little bar of soap, bar of soap. Oh I wish I was a little bar of soap, bar of soap."
They sang together, "I'd go shiny, shiny, shiny, over everybody's hiney, oh I wish I was a little bar of soap, bar of soap."
"And he'd rub the towel over his pajama butt when he sang the 'shiny, shiny, shiny' part!" Sam said, actually giggling at the memory.
"That wasn't the worst one, though, although it seemed pretty dirty to little kids, huh?"
"Yeah. I know what the dirtiest one was." With a wicked grin, he began to sing a silly little song; she joined in once she figured out which one it was. "Doooooo yoooooour balls hang low, do they swing to and fro? Can you beat your meat on the toilet seat? Do you twang your wang with the rest of the gang? Do your balls. Hang. Low?"
They leaned against each other, giggling like little kids.
Kerry made a mohawk out of his hair, using the shampoo to get it to stand up. "It's starting again," she said, and looked down.
Touching her chin, rubbing his thumb over it, he replied, "That's okay," and filled the cup with water.
Sam knew this wouldn't be a one-time deal. He deliberately watched the suds as they ran down her body, forging trails between and around her breasts, to get himself worked up again.
Once they had rinsed their hair, they got out of the tub and toweled off as much as possible, Sam taking great care to dry off his stitches. Then he took a towel to bed to lay over the pillow, and took her to bed, too.
It was slow and loving, as it had been before, Kerry gripping his strong, muscular back as he glided into her, doing what was necessary to relieve the sexual tension between them. Their personal dynamic made things much different from how sex had been with Dean. Then, it had been like a job, something he had to do out of love, awkward and emotionally draining, but they had made the best of it. For Sam, it was more like a treasure he could only share with her under such extreme circumstances. They both knew that if it hadn't been for the incubus venom, this never would have happened, but as long as it was happening, it could be a unique way for them to share and show their love.
It wasn't like they hadn't experimented too, in their teenage years. But things had never gone this far. Somehow, it didn't seem so odd now.
Sam also had to put in multiple lovemaking sessions, taking Kerry in various positions just for variety, hoping one would be the one that satisfied her completely. They tried her facing him in his lap, which Sam especially liked because it meant they could kiss, long passionate kisses with Kerry running her fingers through his damp hair. Then they had her turn around, still sitting in Sam's lap, and they had sex front to back, Kerry leaning her head on his shoulder so they could kiss some more. He made sure to fondle her clit since it was so accessible, pinching and stroking it rapidly until she squealed.
Just after he came, Sam took her by the waist and threw her down on the bed, burying his face between Kerry's legs. He greedily gave her head, something he loved to do to women, something he knew would bring her much gratification. Kerry gasped in surprise, first when Sam threw her down on her back, and then at the first touch of his lips to her clitoris; the way he sucked and nipped at the quivering knob made her arch her back and nearly howl at how pleasurable it was.
These were the first sounds Castiel heard when he finally answered their calls.
The angel entered through the living room, appearing in a corner near one of Bobby's many bookshelves. He tilted his head quizzically at what Dean was doing.
Dean sat in the same chair. The leg cramp seemed to have lessened, and he was still in just his underwear, no longer complaining. Something wasn't right. Dean was using Sam's phone to flip through pornographic pictures on the Internet and rubbing himself through his underwear. His body was shaking.
"Dean?"
Dean jumped in the chair, dropping the phone and making a sound between a moan and a startled squeal. His eyes went wide when he saw Castiel. "Cas! Where have you..." He noticed the blood on Castiel's shirt and pant leg. "Are you okay?"
"I was involved in a skirmish with several demons. These wounds aren't that serious." Even so, Castiel was limping. "Why have you been calling for me?"
"So that's why you didn't come." Getting up, Dean helped Castiel over to the couch where he could sit down. Castiel declined, choosing instead to stand in front of it, still wanting to know what was happening. "Uh... I'm not sure how to explain this..."
"What's wrong with you?" the angel suddenly asked. "You seem to be in distress."
"Distress?"
"Your body is shaking and your temperature is up."
"Uh, I'm... not really sure what's wrong with me, Cas." Running a hand through his hair, he sighed. "Kerry did something, and I'm not sure how to explain it. She, uh, she drank this."
Castiel took the vial that Dean offered; it had been sitting on an endtable. When he smelled it, his eyes widened in shock. "This is the ejaculatory fluid of an incubus."
"Yeah."
"And you say she drank this?"
"Yeah..."
For a moment, the angel could not speak. When Castiel found his voice again, he asked, "Why?"
"We don't know. But Kerry drank the whole vial."
Now Castiel did take a seat on the arm of the couch, a hand to his mouth. His cobalt blue eyes searched the open air as if he could find an answer there.
Dean saw how disturbed Castiel looked in reaction; he surmised that the angel must have an idea of what the incubus cum had done to Kerry, but he began explaining anyway. "She's just been going mad ever since, Cas. I mean stark raving..." He swallowed hard. "Kerry's out of her mind."
"You hoped I could do something."
"Yes."
With a nod, Castiel took stock of what had already happened, asking several questions. "How long has it been?"
"About twelve hours."
"Has she eaten anything?"
"Yeah. Some casserole."
Castiel nodded again. "That should help. The effects would be even worse if she didn't eat. What symptoms have you seen?"
Uncomfortable, Dean looked down. "Are you really going to make me say it, Cas?"
That seemed to tell him everything. "So she's been... acting erratically."
Dean almost laughed. "Yeah, you could say that."
"Constant sexual arousal."
He was glad Castiel was the one to say it and not him. "Oh yeah."
"What happens when Kerry's not getting the stimulation she craves?" Castiel asked.
Swallowing down a heavy lump of emotion, Dean replied with one word. "Pain."
"Is it intense?"
"Yes," he nearly whispered.
Castiel looked toward the hall, from which came the obvious sounds of lovemaking. "You've been seeing to it that she stays satisfied?"
"Uh huh."
He paused a long time, running through possibilities in his mind. "Who's in there... with her now?"
Dean gave him a look before doing a bit of stalling. He wasn't looking forward to telling Castiel the ugly truth. "First, we called Ruby - "
"Ruby?" the angel cried, disbelieving.
"Yeah. She's a demon, she knows a lot about demon-related things. And she, uh..."
That seemed to disturb Castiel a great deal; he put a hand over his mouth and just rubbed it back and forth over his lips and chin, deep regret in his eyes. "I'm sorry I couldn't come sooner."
"Yeah, so are we. Um..." If Castiel had taken Ruby's involvement that hard... "Eventually, Ruby got annoyed with it and left. She said she'd come back and bring a... um, a machine Kerry could use to, ah... you know. But that was hours ago. So... Sam and I... had to..."
When Dean trailed off, Castiel looked up from his stunned stupor with his eyebrows furrowed in bewilderment; for one horrible moment, Dean thought he was going to ask him what he and Sam had been forced to do. Then the realization came into the angel's blue eyes and they became big and round with horror. "You... and Sam..." He pointed to the hallway and the rooms beyond.
Dean nodded, looking ten years younger. It was obvious the thought of what he'd done greatly disturbed him too, and he suddenly looked like a lost little boy. "We had to, Cas. You should have heard how she screamed in pain."
The regret came back into Castiel's eyes, an almost mournful look for what he felt was a personal failure. "You shouldn't of had to do that."
"Cas... is there anything you can do for my sister? Ruby said this could go on for days."
"There may be something, but..." Castiel limp-paced a small strip of the living room. "...it can't be what she really needs."
"What, you mean sex? You won't have sex with her?"
Castiel shook his head.
"But you did it with her before; what's the problem now?" Dean barked, suddenly angry and desperate.
"Dean, I made a promise to my vessel after that first encounter with Kerry. The vessel is married. I told him there would be no more sex without his consent, and only with his wife." Folding his hands in front of him, Castiel stood straight and firm to show he meant it. "I intend to keep my promise."
Dean crossed the room and took Castiel by the lapels of his coat, giving him a little shake. "You've got to change his mind. Cas, you have no idea... you've got to end this somehow. She attacked us, Castiel. If you let Kerry sit around and not get some sort of stimulation for even a minute, she'll practically rip your fucking clothes off! You haven't seen the wild look in her eye when she gets like that. She growls like a motherfucking animal. How can you just sit back and not do anything about it?"
Trying to be gentle but authoritative, Castiel pried Dean's hands from his coat and placed them back by Dean's sides. "I didn't say I wouldn't do anything about it. We'll figure something out. But, unfortunately, that's only one problem we have to solve right now."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, it's like I said when I first entered - there's something wrong with you." Castiel, taking hold of Dean's head at the temple, carefully pushed up one of his eyelids to peer deeply into his crystal green eye. Then he sighed and took his hand down. "You're infected with the incubus venom."
"What? How?"
"Through Kerry's bodily fluids. You came in intimate contact with them and some of the venom passed through your skin." Castiel looked him over. "The concentration you've received isn't nearly as significant as what Kerry ingested, but it's enough to be worrisome."
"Holy shit," Dean exclaimed. "Then Sam's probably infected now too."
"I would imagine so."
"So what happens now? Sam and I are going to go crazy and rape the whole city?"
"That's what I hope to prevent," Castiel replied.
"Oh yeah? And how?"
Hobbling back to the couch, he sat on its arm and thought a moment before replying. "First, I must heal my injuries. Then I will receive Revelation."
Dean caught himself looking at the curve of Castiel's hip when he sat down and his coat fell aside. He started to lick his lips, but instead shook his head in an attempt to clear it. This wasn't good. "Okay, well, could you hurry it up a bit?"
*****
Chapter 9: Cobalt Blue and Feathers of Grey
Word Count this Chapter: 3,321
The more time that went on with Castiel just sitting quietly on the couch with his eyes closed, hands folded together in front of him, the better he was looking to Dean. Better and better. Dean noticed every little thing about him that could be constituted as sexy or even cute. The slightly mussed hair, the adorable little lines around his eyes, the curve of his back and hips in all that clothing he wore... Dean even thought his hands and fingers were sexy.
"Why am I thinking like this?" he wondered to himself, "And why am I not more worried about it?" Dean didn't consider himself gay or even bisexual, but here he was, practically drooling over another guy.
It was the venom. It had to be. Damn it, Kerry! What had she done to them all? "Hey, you almost through over there?" Dean asked.
Clearly annoyed, Castiel sighed and opened his eyes. "Not entirely."
"I guess it's hard to receive that Revelation thing when there's all this stuff going on, huh?"
"It's much easier when I'm not interrupted, yes."
Dean realized Cas meant his interruption. "Sorry," he said, and added, "Meeeow."
Taking a moment to compose himself, Castiel put a hand to his mouth, just thinking. "It's alright, I was about done anyway. I have proposed your problem to some of the other angels, and - "
"You told other angels about our problem?"
"Yes."
Dean rolled his eyes. "I don't want the other angels to know about this!"
"I'm sorry, but it's too late."
"Son of a bitch, they're probably up there laughing their asses off at us right now," he sighed. "If angels have asses."
"Dean, do you want to hear this or not?" Castiel asked, getting impatient.
"Yeah, go on, go on."
"Alright. Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be a way to speed up the process that doesn't involve the use of my vessel in ways contrary to the promises I have made. I could render Kerry unconscious for an extended period, but that would only slow down the process of ridding her system of the poison. Still, that was their best solution."
"So what you're telling me is, Kerry would have to be unconscious for days?"
"It could be weeks, really. Maybe months."
Shaking his head, Dean said, "No. I'm not doing that to her when what we're currently doing works so much faster. I mean, we've already started this... why not finish it?"
"You may be right. If I have to do it to Kerry, I'll eventually be forced to put you and Sam under too." Leaning forward, Castiel asked, "Dean, are you ready to have sex with your sister over and over until this is done?"
Dean chewed on a fingernail. "I don't want to. But if you won't do it..." A determined look came to his face, and he got up out of his chair, grabbing Castiel's arm. "If you're not going to do this, then you're going to be the one to go in there and tell Kerry why."
Castiel allowed Dean to pull him along, but he protested all the way down the hall. The sounds of moaning and bedsprings creaking became louder and louder the closer they got to the guest room. "Dean, she won't understand. Kerry will beg and cry and I don't want to see it."
"Of course you don't; we've only had to deal with it for the last twelve hours."
"Dean, it's not only up to me!"
Dean threw the door open. Castiel saw what he couldn't unsee, but tried to close his eyes quickly anyway. Sam and Kerry were on their sixth lovemaking session, him on top of her and Kerry's legs wrapped around his waist, the two lying across the bed. Her arms were up over her head, Sam holding both of her hands; they kissed deeply, so deeply that Castiel could hardly look at them without feeling such a forlorn melancholy that not even he could understand it fully. "The way you sacrifice for each other..." he remarked, a hand over his eyes.
Sam and Kerry heard his voice, and looked his way. "Castiel," Kerry said, her voice a mixture of relief and confusion.
"Where have you been?" Sam panted.
Castiel just stared as Sam was looking at and talking to him, but his hips continued thrusting, his cock sliding ever so gently in and out of his own sister. The motions had become that automatic.
Dean started to talk, but even he choked up and turned away. "Cas, he... uh... he has something to... to say..." A few thrusts, a moan from his sister's mouth, and Dean could watch no more. "When you're done, Sam, come into the hall," he managed, and closed the door.
Castiel slid down the wall into a crouching position, his head in his hands. "Oh... God, give me strength to keep my promise," he mumbled to himself.
Shortly after, both men cringed when the moans reached a frenzied pitch and Sam and Kerry cried out each other's names. Dean put his hands over his ears. "They can't help it," he told himself.
Sam came to the door with his jeans on, sweaty and still panting a bit. "Cas, where have you been?"
"I was involved in a skirmish with demons."
"I'm glad you're here now. Kerry needs you. She's absolutely exhausted." Now Sam grew sheepish at what he was saying, what he'd been doing, knowing from Castiel's expression that he was shocked at what he'd seen. "I'm not sure how much longer I could have held out... my lower back was starting to spasm, and..." He looked down at the floor.
The door wasn't all the way closed; they could hear Kerry panting tiredly on the bed.
"Sam, I'm... I'm sorry, but I can't," Castiel replied.
Looking up, Sam said, "What?! Why not?"
Castiel explained about the promise he'd made to his vessel. From inside the room, Kerry cried, "My Bible! Bring me the Bible I marked!"
Dean pushed the door open. "What, Kerry?"
"Get the Bible I marked with the sticky notes!" She had covered herself up with the sheets.
Sam got the Bible of which she spoke and brought it to her. "Why do you want this now?"
"Cas, come here," she commanded.
Bewildered, the angel entered the room and sat on the other bed.
"Since you told me we couldn't be together again because of your vessel, I have been searching the Bible for passages that relate to our situation, and I think I can convince him to change his mind," Kerry explained, beginning to flip through the book.
"I doubt that," Castiel replied.
"Just let me try, okay?" She found the passage she was looking for and began to read. "Make sure your vessel is listening. For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. Hebrews, 4:12. You know what that means, don't you?"
"I am familiar with the words of the holy scripture..."
"Okay, then you know that there is a distinct difference between the flesh and the soul. No matter what a person does with their body, it's what is in their heart that really matters. What's the vessel's name?"
"James Novak," Castiel replied. "Everyone calls him Jimmy."
"Jimmy," Dean chuckled. "You don't look like a Jimmy."
"Alright, Jimmy. You don't want to cheat on your wife, but no one can make you do that unless you want to in your heart." Kerry suddenly winced, holding her midsection. "Your body is just a vessel for the soul. What the body does, it doesn't mean the soul does it too. It says here..." She flipped through the pages. "...in Romans 7:20 through 25, ...if I do what I do not wish, it is no longer I who do it, but the sin that dwells in me. Therefore, when I wish to do good I discover this law, namely, that evil is at hand for me. For I am delighted with the law of God according to the inner man, but I see another law in my members, warring..." Wincing, Kerry doubled over, beginning to pant again. "...warring against the law of my mind..."
Realizing the pain was coming back, Sam sat on the bed next to his sister and put an arm around her; he held the other side of the book and read. "For I am delighted with the law of God according to the inner man, but I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me from the body of this death? The grace of God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God, but with my flesh the law of sin.
"Does Jimmy understand what she's trying to say here, Cas?"
Castiel suddenly blurted, "I don't appreciate the word of God being used against me!" He shifted uncomfortably on the edge of the bed, trying to regain his composure.
"But it is the word of your God," Dean pointed out.
Forcing the words out, Kerry said, "Jimmy is a Christian, isn't he?"
Castiel nodded.
"Then he understands that a Christian can only sin in the flesh and not necessarily of the mind, the heart, just like this part says. He's been saved by Jesus Christ. His body is being used to serve God by the inhabitance of an angel. Does he want to do everything you do, Castiel?"
"No..." Castiel admitted reluctantly.
"But he does it, doesn't he? Jimmy, you allow Cas complete control of your body. You gave that willingly. And if Castiel did something against God's word, like Uriel did, it wouldn't mean that Uriel's vessel would suffer too. That man's soul has already been saved. Even if Cas uses your body to make love to someone else, it doesn't mean you are doing it as well." Kerry stopped to hold her stomach and whine like a child with a bad tummyache. "The two of you are distinctly separate, as is your soul from your flesh. You're holding onto your own body too hard, giving it too much significance, when it's your soul that really matters to God... and to your wife."
Castiel thought about that a long time; Kerry hoped he was having an inward conversation with his vessel. Finally, he said, "Jimmy doesn't like seeing you suffer. He said he will allow it as long as I push him deep down in his subconscious, where he can't perceive what's happening."
Kerry breathed out in relief, repeating, "Thank you, thank you, thank you," gratefully.
Castiel continued. "He said he will not have sex with you, only I will, that he is faithful to his wife, and that he knows he is separate from his flesh, which is sinful even without his presence." The angel paused, a regretful, sad look coming over his features. "But I cannot have sex with you either."
Everyone froze in disbelief; they had all thought they were home free. "Why not?" Kerry groaned.
"Because I am an angel," he replied. "Angels have fallen for mating with human women. I will not forsake the grace of God again."
Kerry reached between the beds and took hold of his hand. "I'm not asking you to mate with me, Cas. Just to make love to me."
Although it was obvious how much he wanted to give in, Castiel shook his head. "I have never felt so guilty without committing a sin," he said quietly.
Desperately, Kerry flipped through the Bible, pointing to a passage and indicating that she wanted Sam to read it. He read it over and grinned. "For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans, 8:38 and 39." Putting the book down, Sam added, "Not even your own might could separate you from the love of God, Castiel. He will understand that you did it to help us and not to forsake Him."
"Yeah, Cas, I mean..." Dean began, "it's not like you're shacking up with Kerry, gettin' married and having babies with her like those other angels did."
Tilting his head, Castiel looked at Dean as if he wasn't sure he heard him right. "Shacking up?"
"You know what I mean. You and Kerry aren't in love or anything."
Before anyone could think too deeply about Dean's statement, Kerry squeezed Castiel's hand once more. "Please," she begged.
He could see the pain in her eyes. It hurt him deeply to know he could end that pain right now, but ancient tradition should keep him from it. "Do you really think God would understand that even angels sin?" Castiel asked.
All three Winchesters nodded their heads.
"Then... alright. Alright." Castiel took her hand in both of his, cradling her shaking fingers. "I want you to understand that I don't condone or understand what you did. But, I will end your suffering here and now."
So grateful just to hear him say it, Kerry started to climb his chest, gripping his coat tightly in her fingers. "Cas... Cas..." she breathed, and almost fell off her own bed from leaning across the space between them. Looking at her sadly, Castiel caught her and lifted her back onto the other bed, fixing the covers around her naked body.
"You two better leave," he said to Sam and Dean, and the brothers filed out into the hall, leaving the door ajar.
"Why aren't you closing the door?" Sam asked.
Dean realized that Sam's hands were beginning to shake. "There's something I have to tell you," he began.
Castiel leaned over Kerry on the bed, kissing her mouth and stroking her hair. She became frantic again, pulling at his coat, trying to get it off. He couldn't stand to hear those animalistic sounds coming out of her mouth, so he took hold of her face and made her look into his eyes. "Shhh, shhhh, calm down, it's okay," Castiel said, rubbing his thumbs soothingly over her cheekbones. The growls calmed back to breathy grunts, and she slowly stopped yanking at his clothing.
Castiel removed the coat, then the suitcoat, and then pulled at the knot in his tie. Kerry instantly jumped up on her knees on the bed and began to help him remove it. When they both got to the shirt buttons, the growling started again. "Calm down, it's only a matter of time," he said, like he was talking to a frightened child.
But Kerry could not wait, and Castiel was only half undressed when she unbuckled his belt and opened it, going then for the button and zipper. His pants dropped to his knees, followed by his underwear. He knelt on the bed in only his undone shirt with the tie wrapped loosely around his neck while Kerry surveyed how vulnerable he looked, wondering who was in control this time. She took hold of the loose ends of the tie and pulled him down on top of her.
They kissed for a bit; Castiel whispered to her when their lips were not touching, and sometimes when they were, just barely. "We're going to do something that we haven't done before. Don't be scared. It's the only way."
"Will it hurt?"
"Exactly the opposite."
After another minute of kissing and rolling about in each other's arms, Castiel put his hands on the underside of her thighs, gently pulling them further apart. He moved deeper in between them and put the head of his cock to her entrance; Kerry mewled at the feeling of him slowly sliding inside. "Castiel," she moaned.
He ran his fingers into her hair, caressing the side of her head. "Kerry," he said back. Everything about his tone suggested how concerned he was for her and how much he wanted her to stop hurting herself. She had no idea how she could know all that from one word, but Kerry knew. She could see it every time she looked into his eyes.
They made love, joined together in a slow dance of passion, their hips meeting with simultaneous thrusts. When Kerry's moans began to reach a more frantic pace, Castiel locked eyes with her. "Don't be afraid," he whispered again. "I won't hurt you." He waved a hand before her eyes, whispering something in Enochian.
Kerry felt an intense orgasm building between her legs. Even as Castiel moved, all she could see were his eyes; it was like swimming in a sea of cobalt blue. Everywhere she looked, eyes, four, now six of them, all gorgeous cobalt blue, pinning her to the bed as the orgasm grew. And then suddenly, it was upon her, and Kerry was climaxing, but it was more intense than she could have anticipated, a definite multiple orgasm that struck her dumb for she knew not how long. Pleasure exploded along every nerve ending, and she became aware that she was screaming herself hoarse, and her arms were repeatedly pounding against the bed as if she was convulsing her way through these orgasms that just would not end. She could hear herself crying out, "Castiel! Ohhh, Castiel! Yes, yes, yes! Caaaaasssss!" Then there were grayish white wings all around the bed, like a canopy, like a veil, those blue eyes and wings and that was all she could see.
Dean and Sam had been sitting in the hall, shaking all over, trying not to just give in and masturbate to their heart's content. When they heard Kerry's overwhelmed cries, they got up and tried to enter the room to find out what the hell could be happening to make her react so dramatically and for so long. Dean pushed on the door, but something that looked like a large bird wing suddenly blocked it and slammed it shut. Both men gasped in surprise.
The high-pitched whine that had accompanied Castiel's previous attempt to speak with Dean in his real voice sounded from the room. It was not as loud, but it did make Sam and Dean's ears ring. "Don't come in yet," Castiel called, in both voices. "You can't see me." Bright light streamed from under the door.
"What about Kerry?!" Sam yelled.
"Her eyes have been veiled," came the musical reply.
Kerry continued to cry out as if she was having the best orgasm of her life, times one hundred. A full minute passed before she began to calm down, and the intense light to fade. Eventually, she was just letting out hoarse little moans, occasionally saying the angel's name. "Castiel... Castiel... Castiel..."
Kerry saw his face, the human face of his vessel, as he dropped a little kiss on her lips. Then she fainted.
Sam and Dean came in just as Castiel was laying her out on the bed and putting the covers over her. "Is she okay?" Dean asked.
"Yes. She will sleep now, probably for a good twelve hours or more. The demon venom has been burned from her system." Castiel looked back at them. "There will be no lingering negative effects on her body."
Both men were relieved and grateful, tears pricking at their eyes. "Thank you, Cas."
"We know you didn't have to do that."
"It's alright. I made a decision to see this through." With a weary sigh, Castiel sat on the edge of Kerry's bed, his remaining clothes all rumpled. "Now there's the matter of you two."
On to
Chapter 10: Merciful Bliss