Just read your entries in some oa/ed communities and some of your blog postings - I want to thank you for inspiring me and being honest and raw. I first was in oa in 1993 as a very young teen - and I stayed 105 pounds (I am 5 foot 3ish and somehwat small boned so I was NOT emaciated) until around 2000 and then the weight crept back up. In 2003 I peaked at 210/215 (I was SHOCKED when I finally weighed myself) - now I'm what, 190 or 180, I haven't weighed myself in a while but I have been a huge failure for 6 or 7 years (up and down and up and down - but more up than down and the down wasn't that down if you know what I mean) and it is remarkable I have actually allowed so much time to pass (my damn youth!!!) being a fattie! It is MY FAULT, I am not going to blame it on genetics or my wretched childhood or past devastations anymore - It is me, me, me. I know I am an addict and self will alone doesnt work - but fat acceptance is the easier softer way out and is, in my opinion, a damn cop out. I have brought out the nazi oa diet again and the effin scales and cups and have been forcing myself to the meetings because I am tired of being the fat girl in the family/friend circle/group/workplace, etc. I'm tired of being a walking JOKE. I'm tired of being WEAK. So kudos to your ballsy stance on calling out fat acceptance for what it is.
You sound like you have been through Hell and Back....specsafetyAugust 20 2007, 19:51:29 UTC
Thank you for the thumbs up. I just went to an OA retreat this weekend--only to see my dear friend Harlan, who has lost 500 lbs and has kept if off for 9 years. I was shocked when I saw some of the OAs I havent seen in 2 years; in particular, an old sponsee that left me after I brought him from 400 to 180--he was cured apparantly. This sponsee was 400, diabetes, sleep apnea etc etc. When fired me, he was at 180, diabetes GONE, Sleep apnea GONE etc etc. When I saw him this weekend, I nearly did not recognize him---easily over 500 lbs!!!! The big book says it all in the Dr's Opinion--"The only relief we suggest is entire abstinence" Its amazing that a huge amount of folks in the 12-step food fellowships fail to embrace this key idea. My friend Harlan says about 1 percent of the folks in OA "get it" Of those people about 10 percent will keep it--very poor results. In CEA-HOW, I have found some fat serenity, but, at least the program defines "the path" not paths, as so many OAers self define. I have very little patience for the fat serenity folks out there. Either one spreads recovery or one spreads disease. Unwittingly, those fat serenity folks are spreading the disease. Anyways, I hope I did not bore you with my pontification! Keep the course, feel free to make an outreach, if you want, my way. Specsafety at ya hoo dot com
;)
/ rant
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I added you to my yahoo // flapperjane ///
I also posted this question to you here few days ago...if you have a moment...
http://community.livejournal.com/o_a/217245.html
thanks!
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