August 24th, 2010 (subtitle: EEP!)
Whoops! I haven't written in this in about a week. Nothing really notable to write about, really, plus by the time I got home from work during the week, the last thing my brain can handle is cognitive thought. So I'm scraping together some of my remaining brain cells before I head to work and attempting to get things out in the open, written down, so I have at least something to say of myself.
Since last entry, as I said before, nothing noteworthy has happened. I won't be getting a table for Artist Alley at Bakuretsucon this year, but not that it matters, I don't really have any real product to sell. I'm contemplating making character stickers on FurAffinity, but I really don't have anything to boast art-wise there that might garner some positive reaction on that idea, so... oh snot, I'm rambling. Short: I won't be in Artist Alley at Baku-con.
Hormones have been exceedingly vicious this cycle, meaning I have been incredibly down-in-the-dumps. I've been wanting to retreat into myself, to run away from folks and activities, and to just be left alone. Does this mean I don't like companionship and company? Heck no. But it does kind of throw me against a wall. I'm weird in that I adore having friends and loved ones, but I'm too nervous and afraid of just letting loose and being social. I'm not a social butterfly, am very awkward in conversation, and embarrass incredibly easily, so I am apt to making some idiot comment out loud, or act in a certain way, then feel like a moron afterwards. But this has hurt my existing friendships, and potential new friendships, and I know it has. But I'm so entrenched in my comfort zone that I wonder if I can safely escape it and yet be allowed to remain who I am. I know I'm quiet, don't like speaking out loud much, and have rather a passive-agressive bent. Sometimes I don't know if that's merely character or flaw. OH NO RAMBLING AGAIN. Sorry.
I'm just unloading what's in my brain before work. Maybe it'll calm me down. Tea, aromatherapy, and sound is helping, or at least I think so.
Since last entry, as I said before, nothing noteworthy has happened. I won't be getting a table for Artist Alley at Bakuretsucon this year, but not that it matters, I don't really have any real product to sell. I'm contemplating making character stickers on FurAffinity, but I really don't have anything to boast art-wise there that might garner some positive reaction on that idea, so... oh snot, I'm rambling. Short: I won't be in Artist Alley at Baku-con.
Hormones have been exceedingly vicious this cycle, meaning I have been incredibly down-in-the-dumps. I've been wanting to retreat into myself, to run away from folks and activities, and to just be left alone. Does this mean I don't like companionship and company? Heck no. But it does kind of throw me against a wall. I'm weird in that I adore having friends and loved ones, but I'm too nervous and afraid of just letting loose and being social. I'm not a social butterfly, am very awkward in conversation, and embarrass incredibly easily, so I am apt to making some idiot comment out loud, or act in a certain way, then feel like a moron afterwards. But this has hurt my existing friendships, and potential new friendships, and I know it has. But I'm so entrenched in my comfort zone that I wonder if I can safely escape it and yet be allowed to remain who I am. I know I'm quiet, don't like speaking out loud much, and have rather a passive-agressive bent. Sometimes I don't know if that's merely character or flaw. OH NO RAMBLING AGAIN. Sorry.
I'm just unloading what's in my brain before work. Maybe it'll calm me down. Tea, aromatherapy, and sound is helping, or at least I think so.