Zim is MEEEE!
Turkey Day (as my girlfriend puts it) is just around the corner. I can't friggin' WAIT. I'm spending the first half of my day at Steph's house eating with her family...then we're both going back to my house to eat with my family. I know, we're fuckin' fatties. It's cool! Well..for her it is. She can eat anything and not gain a pound..but I eat a cheeseburger and I gain like ten pounds. I always tell her that her metabolism is so high that when I walk beside her..I can feel it eating my fatty cells and feeding HER. Haha. Unrealistically sci-fi..I know.
I think tomorrow is gonna be a really good day..but I can see myself being sad if I think about it too much. I really iss having my full family here. Todd is living out of state with his girlfriend, and my father hasn't come around in forever. I remember when I was little, every year we would go to this church (where my cousin David got married a few weeks ago) and we'd have a massive family Thanksgiving. It just...stopped happening one year. Then my parents got divorced. That sucked. Anyways.
Maybe that's a sign that things always change, and life moves faster than you want to think or admit. A few days ago I took a gander at all of my previous posts here on LJ. It was quite enthralling..I couldn't stop reading once I started. I've changed so much..a lot more than I have realized. Through all of the heartache and hurt that I've gone through in the past...3 or 4 years, I can actually say that it's made me a much better person. Things that happened to me has shaped me into the person I am, the person that uses the pain and transforms it into love and caring.
A sappy fuck, I am. It's good to be sensitive, I guess. The naivety I used to have has almost melted away into a wiser self-awareness. I guess you could say that I'm growing up, my wounds are now forgotten scars, and I'm becoming seasoned.
Last night I spent some time with Steph, just her and I. I feel like I'm finally in a mature relationship. We can sit there and do anything together and it's fun. Take last night. We just ate icecream together on the couch and watched Invader Zim. That's it. Ate ice cream, cuddled and watched TV and I was completely happy...content...complete. I finally feel like I am healthy relationship. One that's based off trust, honesty, and openness. I can love and not feel like things are one sided. Our love isn't superficial...it's something that I can feel within my being. When I'm not around her, I hurt. With her, I'm invinsible. I know it's only been three months, but I can see myself with her for the rest of my life.
End.
I think tomorrow is gonna be a really good day..but I can see myself being sad if I think about it too much. I really iss having my full family here. Todd is living out of state with his girlfriend, and my father hasn't come around in forever. I remember when I was little, every year we would go to this church (where my cousin David got married a few weeks ago) and we'd have a massive family Thanksgiving. It just...stopped happening one year. Then my parents got divorced. That sucked. Anyways.
Maybe that's a sign that things always change, and life moves faster than you want to think or admit. A few days ago I took a gander at all of my previous posts here on LJ. It was quite enthralling..I couldn't stop reading once I started. I've changed so much..a lot more than I have realized. Through all of the heartache and hurt that I've gone through in the past...3 or 4 years, I can actually say that it's made me a much better person. Things that happened to me has shaped me into the person I am, the person that uses the pain and transforms it into love and caring.
A sappy fuck, I am. It's good to be sensitive, I guess. The naivety I used to have has almost melted away into a wiser self-awareness. I guess you could say that I'm growing up, my wounds are now forgotten scars, and I'm becoming seasoned.
Last night I spent some time with Steph, just her and I. I feel like I'm finally in a mature relationship. We can sit there and do anything together and it's fun. Take last night. We just ate icecream together on the couch and watched Invader Zim. That's it. Ate ice cream, cuddled and watched TV and I was completely happy...content...complete. I finally feel like I am healthy relationship. One that's based off trust, honesty, and openness. I can love and not feel like things are one sided. Our love isn't superficial...it's something that I can feel within my being. When I'm not around her, I hurt. With her, I'm invinsible. I know it's only been three months, but I can see myself with her for the rest of my life.
End.