Why I shouldn't try to write my thoughts after 2am
Okay, I just want to throw this link up, because while it's probably been reblogged a million times already, I still love it:
http://marielikestodraw.tumblr.com/post/14403332968/the-homoeroticism-bait
Seriously, read it, and then read her follow-up. It's worth it.
Why do I throw this on here? Because it's reminded me of something, and I want to make a note here, so that if in ten years I haven't managed this and I happen to find my old LJ, I will find it and remember.
Here's the thing: I want to be a proper writer. Yeah, probably will never happen, but it's there, and has been pretty much all my life.
And if I ever manage it, I want to do two things: I want to write a character for whom sex and relationships are not the sole purpose in life, who doesn't date just because they don't and that's fine (Sherlock, you gave me hopes here, but I have a horrible horrible feeling that a certain Ms Adler is going to break my heart); and I am going to slip in a gay couple where the big thing is not that they are gay, but that they are a couple. You know, like almost every heterosexual couple on TV, who just happen.
I realise these goals might seem contradictory: I want my awesome friendships that are awesome and they're just friends, and I also want canon slash. Except I want it to be canon slash the way there's canon het. I think one of the few times I've seen it done like this is Dru Pagliasotti's Clockwork Heart. Towards the end, it is really heavily implied that two of the guys MIGHT hook up, and it is discussed by the others as a vague `hey, didn't know they were gay` but focusing more on, you know, personalities and whatnot, before just carrying on with the plot. And I love it.
But I love my bromances. And the female equivalent. There is a reason I read loads of slash but often find it hard to write. I have no idea if I'm straight or gay or asexual or what but I wish it would stop being something defining. I just want that one character for whom these things are just something background. That is part of the reason I like the Doctor or Sherlock Holmes: these are (semi) relatable characters for whom their main relationships aren't romantic. (You may already be able to tell that there's a whole separate rant here.) Maybe I'm just stuck in a little kid mindset where sex doesn't define relationships, but hey, I shouldn't feel immature for thinking that maybe friendship's pretty damn awesome too. Besides, you notice that we USED to have loads of stuff where that was background, like the original Holmes stories, or actually most stuff pre-'60s. (Oh God, I'm a fuddy-duddy, aren't I? Great, something else negative to label myself with. Time for some more self-loathing.) Maybe I'm just born in the wrong time period or something.
Wow, this went a bit OT. I think I meant to talk about, you know, bromances and slash and subtle gay characters and all that jazz and went off somewhere else. What can I say? It's after 2am, I don't know what I'm saying. But I get the feeling it wasn't fun. Sorry about that.