HELLO MY LOVES
ok so i would like to crawl in a hole and die. i am so sick of this step-family crap. i have tryed so hard to get them to like me. i am nice, talk about what they want to talk about, do my hair all nice, wear makeup, dress like they do. and do they care? no. do they egnolage the fact that i am in the room? no. do they ever invite me to any party they throw? no. then why in the world should denise think i shoudl have to? we do not get along, we don't even pretend to get along all that well. and i know that is how it is. other people out side the family at all the family functions see it, my dad has seen it. and what do they tell me? it's not right but just go with it. it's not going to be that long. and now denise is all butt hurt that i do not want 2 or of the girls and a boy to come to something of extreme importance to me. it hurts her that i think they're not good enough, she is disappointed in my choice, but she knows that it is my party and that i will have whatever i want. well when it comes to the company yes. i want to be able to look back on this and say that ALL of the people were proud of me,that they were all happy for me, that they all wanted to come. and if they come it's not going to be like that. they are going to sit in the corner and make very small talk to people and my people that are there are going to feel uncomfortable and not have a good time because they feel they are being judged, and i do not want that. now if they came to things and talked o people and had fun, i would love to have them. i do not think less of them, i just know that they have better things to do with there time then come to something that has to do with me. so yeah i am really wishing i had a hole!
much love
much love