(no subject)
For once I'll post something here that is real. I thought about posting it on wordpress, as that is more popular. My wordpress is what bankers might call a speculative investment, an artist might call it any idea. I don't have one. I'd have to fill in a bunch of forms, giving out my top-secret alias and e-mail to everyone. Plus I spent a lot of time pimping this livejournal out. Eight years ago. Where on earth does time go? I'm going to destroy time one of these days, I've found it's my most persistent and dangerous enemy. Anyhow I would also have to find friends. I think here on Livejournal I have around forty. On wordpress I have zero, with the speculative potential for millions. Likely just zero though. Of my forty friends though I'd garner that no more than 3-4 people read it, and one of those is some one I've never met. So to make a ranting story sane, LJ sucks, and blogs are worthless. Oh, and facebook is ruining ranting for everyone.
The real reason I'm writing is that I've been having really weird dreams. All right, that sounds lame. I'll grant you that. Thing is I don't really ever have dreams, like usually two a year or so. I've had terrifying dreams for the last three nights. Now let me clarify; I don't mean terrifying in the 'monster chasing me' sense. That would be better. No in my dreams I am a different person. I believe I'm me, but I'm doing things so far out of character it's frightening. I'm fucking thinking differently. In one dream I found out that I had a kid, and I was really fucking happy about it. Way too happy. To clarify, I dislike kids and I fear having a kid almost more than anything else. I think I need a dream interpretor, but I think they would just lean over and say something like this: "It's really quite simple, your subconscious is forcing you out of your brain. It just isn't fond of you." I can't say I blame it, I've spent most of my life trying to ignore the bugger. Now it's going to try and kill me.
Right. What else is there to say?
I feel like society is getting closer to some sort of deep violent chasm. That might be a discussion for a more political post, those ones that 1/4 of my audience get so excited about. I mean you Kelsey.
I'm trying to sort out my place right now, I had another dream where a tooth came out of my mouth. That may mean I'm stressed about something I'm told. Or I have really bad dental hygiene and my subconscious is going to kill me for it. Anyhow, I have to actually start going out into the real world, try to repair the fabric of my social network. This is hampered by the fact I functionally don't have a vehicle, and I am staying in a crapsac part of Albuquerque. I functionally live in a hotel room, and I get Christian propaganda spouted at me any time I come out.
I wish I could make friends easier. I'm constantly losing more friends that I'm gaining. At this rate I'm not going to die alone, I'm going to die with -40 friends, except on facebook where it will have mushroomed to absurdly high levels. My issue seems to be routed in some sort of apprehension in my brain. I refuse to really call people. I don't actually care to explain it. Sorry for the false start there.
Damn, I could really use a drink.
The real reason I'm writing is that I've been having really weird dreams. All right, that sounds lame. I'll grant you that. Thing is I don't really ever have dreams, like usually two a year or so. I've had terrifying dreams for the last three nights. Now let me clarify; I don't mean terrifying in the 'monster chasing me' sense. That would be better. No in my dreams I am a different person. I believe I'm me, but I'm doing things so far out of character it's frightening. I'm fucking thinking differently. In one dream I found out that I had a kid, and I was really fucking happy about it. Way too happy. To clarify, I dislike kids and I fear having a kid almost more than anything else. I think I need a dream interpretor, but I think they would just lean over and say something like this: "It's really quite simple, your subconscious is forcing you out of your brain. It just isn't fond of you." I can't say I blame it, I've spent most of my life trying to ignore the bugger. Now it's going to try and kill me.
Right. What else is there to say?
I feel like society is getting closer to some sort of deep violent chasm. That might be a discussion for a more political post, those ones that 1/4 of my audience get so excited about. I mean you Kelsey.
I'm trying to sort out my place right now, I had another dream where a tooth came out of my mouth. That may mean I'm stressed about something I'm told. Or I have really bad dental hygiene and my subconscious is going to kill me for it. Anyhow, I have to actually start going out into the real world, try to repair the fabric of my social network. This is hampered by the fact I functionally don't have a vehicle, and I am staying in a crapsac part of Albuquerque. I functionally live in a hotel room, and I get Christian propaganda spouted at me any time I come out.
I wish I could make friends easier. I'm constantly losing more friends that I'm gaining. At this rate I'm not going to die alone, I'm going to die with -40 friends, except on facebook where it will have mushroomed to absurdly high levels. My issue seems to be routed in some sort of apprehension in my brain. I refuse to really call people. I don't actually care to explain it. Sorry for the false start there.
Damn, I could really use a drink.