If you'd like to know about me.....
I saw this little question thingy and decided to take the test.
1. What is your first name?
Bertrum
2. Were you named after anyone?
My mom's 3rd boyfriend in high school
3. Do you wish on stars?
I wish for that fat lady from the practice every day
4. Which finger is your favorite?
my opposable thumb, its so handy. get it?
5. When did you last cry?
this morning, watching the sunrise, when a dog bit my crotch.
6. Do you like your handwriting?
lol what is handwriting
7. What is your favorite lunch meat?
processed turkey
8. Any bad habits?
i lie alot
9. What is your most embarrassing CD on the shelf?
the one with all my bootleg metallica mp3s
10. If you were another person, would you be friends WITH you?
hard to say, if i was an assclown that nobody liked, then no, if i was awesome and cool, then yeah
11. Are you a daredevil?
red tights and all
12. Have you ever told a secret you swore not to tell?
no, i never told anyone that george warner isn't circumsised
13. Do looks matter?
only if the chick is ugly
14. Have you ever misused a word and it sounded absolutely stupid?
lol
15. Do you think there is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow?
yeah, but that frickin leprechaun keeps running off with it
16. Do fish have feelings?
gosh, i hope not, i can't imagine it would feel very good when you beat them with a club and cut them up for sashimi
17. Are you trendy?
i started the flannel craze of the 70s from inside my mother's womb, so that would be a big "yes"
18. How do you release anger?
punting midgets
19. Where is your second home?
i haven't finished paying off the first one
20. Do you trust others easily?
only nigerians
21. What was your favorite toy as a child?
my coleco vision game system
22. What subject in school do you think is totally useless?
spanish. frickin mexicans should speak english, their language is dumb.
23. Do you update your LJ daily?
not daily, no. its an annual thing.
24. Do you use sarcasm a lot?
only when i'm being sarcastic
25. Have you ever been in a mosh pit?
no, i find them distasteful and unnecessarily violent
26. What qualities do you look for in a male or female?
depends. dogs need to be of good breeding; same with horses. bobcats, the pattern of their fur is important. wildebeasts, as long as they're healthy there's no problem. peacocks, the males need to have bright ass feathers.
27. What is your nickname?
Bert
28. Would you bungee jump?
if you pay for it
29. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
yes, and i unlace them, as well. it prevents thieving.
30. Do you think that you are strong?
i can lift a full back-pack, so yes
31. What's your favorite ice cream flavor?
french vanilla
32. What's your favorite color?
yellowish-white
33. Are you in love with anyone?
no, but i'm currently stalking someone. i'm hoping it will evolve into something more serious.
34. How many people do you have a crush on right now?
just the one
35. Who do you miss most right now?
President Reagan. He wasn't afraid to push the button.
36. What color pants are you wearing?
i'm in my underoos with little rhinos and sports cars
37. What are you listening to right now?
jimmy buffett
38. What are the last 4 digits of your home phone number?
i'm not saying. i'm a stalker, i know how this works.
39. What was the last thing you ate?
i don't know, i'll have to look when it comes back out.
40. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
white, because it never gets used.
41. How is the weather right now?
freezing
42. Last person you talked to on the phone?
she said her name was laquisha, but i dunno, the girls on those numbers all sound the same
43. First thing you notice about the opposite sex?
how loud they scream when i grab them
44. How are you today?
irregular, but coping
45. Favorite soft drink?
vanilla coke with those marachino cherries plopped inside
46. Favorite alcoholic drink?
virgin daiquiri
47. Favorite sports?
full contact golf, marco polo, and dodgeball
48. Hair color?
usually brown, except when i visit the US, darn FBI
49. Eye color?
red, i drank too much last night
50. Do you wear contacts?
no
51. Favorite month?
december, its like a month-long saturday
52. Favorite food?
the edible kind
53. Last movie you watched?
Troy
54. Favorite day of the year?
everyday i wake up is my favorite day
55. Are you too shy to ask someone out?
yes, that's why i just grab them
56. Scary movies or happy endings?
happy movies with scary endings
57. Summer or winter?
winter, that's when december is, silly
58. Hugs or kisses?
a kiss is not a kiss without a hug
59. Relationships or one-night stands?
relationships, one nighters are for whores and hermaphrodites
60. Living arrangements?
i live with an unemployed crippled midget
61. What books are you reading?
Live Journals for Dummies
62. What's on your mouse pad?
John Kerry in a tutu
63. What did you watch on TV last night?
Quantum leap reruns
64. Favorite smells?
campfires, jet fuel, WD40, pretty much anything flammable
65. What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
breathing, taking a leak.....one of those two
1. What is your first name?
Bertrum
2. Were you named after anyone?
My mom's 3rd boyfriend in high school
3. Do you wish on stars?
I wish for that fat lady from the practice every day
4. Which finger is your favorite?
my opposable thumb, its so handy. get it?
5. When did you last cry?
this morning, watching the sunrise, when a dog bit my crotch.
6. Do you like your handwriting?
lol what is handwriting
7. What is your favorite lunch meat?
processed turkey
8. Any bad habits?
i lie alot
9. What is your most embarrassing CD on the shelf?
the one with all my bootleg metallica mp3s
10. If you were another person, would you be friends WITH you?
hard to say, if i was an assclown that nobody liked, then no, if i was awesome and cool, then yeah
11. Are you a daredevil?
red tights and all
12. Have you ever told a secret you swore not to tell?
no, i never told anyone that george warner isn't circumsised
13. Do looks matter?
only if the chick is ugly
14. Have you ever misused a word and it sounded absolutely stupid?
lol
15. Do you think there is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow?
yeah, but that frickin leprechaun keeps running off with it
16. Do fish have feelings?
gosh, i hope not, i can't imagine it would feel very good when you beat them with a club and cut them up for sashimi
17. Are you trendy?
i started the flannel craze of the 70s from inside my mother's womb, so that would be a big "yes"
18. How do you release anger?
punting midgets
19. Where is your second home?
i haven't finished paying off the first one
20. Do you trust others easily?
only nigerians
21. What was your favorite toy as a child?
my coleco vision game system
22. What subject in school do you think is totally useless?
spanish. frickin mexicans should speak english, their language is dumb.
23. Do you update your LJ daily?
not daily, no. its an annual thing.
24. Do you use sarcasm a lot?
only when i'm being sarcastic
25. Have you ever been in a mosh pit?
no, i find them distasteful and unnecessarily violent
26. What qualities do you look for in a male or female?
depends. dogs need to be of good breeding; same with horses. bobcats, the pattern of their fur is important. wildebeasts, as long as they're healthy there's no problem. peacocks, the males need to have bright ass feathers.
27. What is your nickname?
Bert
28. Would you bungee jump?
if you pay for it
29. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
yes, and i unlace them, as well. it prevents thieving.
30. Do you think that you are strong?
i can lift a full back-pack, so yes
31. What's your favorite ice cream flavor?
french vanilla
32. What's your favorite color?
yellowish-white
33. Are you in love with anyone?
no, but i'm currently stalking someone. i'm hoping it will evolve into something more serious.
34. How many people do you have a crush on right now?
just the one
35. Who do you miss most right now?
President Reagan. He wasn't afraid to push the button.
36. What color pants are you wearing?
i'm in my underoos with little rhinos and sports cars
37. What are you listening to right now?
jimmy buffett
38. What are the last 4 digits of your home phone number?
i'm not saying. i'm a stalker, i know how this works.
39. What was the last thing you ate?
i don't know, i'll have to look when it comes back out.
40. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
white, because it never gets used.
41. How is the weather right now?
freezing
42. Last person you talked to on the phone?
she said her name was laquisha, but i dunno, the girls on those numbers all sound the same
43. First thing you notice about the opposite sex?
how loud they scream when i grab them
44. How are you today?
irregular, but coping
45. Favorite soft drink?
vanilla coke with those marachino cherries plopped inside
46. Favorite alcoholic drink?
virgin daiquiri
47. Favorite sports?
full contact golf, marco polo, and dodgeball
48. Hair color?
usually brown, except when i visit the US, darn FBI
49. Eye color?
red, i drank too much last night
50. Do you wear contacts?
no
51. Favorite month?
december, its like a month-long saturday
52. Favorite food?
the edible kind
53. Last movie you watched?
Troy
54. Favorite day of the year?
everyday i wake up is my favorite day
55. Are you too shy to ask someone out?
yes, that's why i just grab them
56. Scary movies or happy endings?
happy movies with scary endings
57. Summer or winter?
winter, that's when december is, silly
58. Hugs or kisses?
a kiss is not a kiss without a hug
59. Relationships or one-night stands?
relationships, one nighters are for whores and hermaphrodites
60. Living arrangements?
i live with an unemployed crippled midget
61. What books are you reading?
Live Journals for Dummies
62. What's on your mouse pad?
John Kerry in a tutu
63. What did you watch on TV last night?
Quantum leap reruns
64. Favorite smells?
campfires, jet fuel, WD40, pretty much anything flammable
65. What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
breathing, taking a leak.....one of those two