FYI
Well my parents know about my depression and suicidal thoughts now, a very unfun conversation to have, though I was relieved once they knew, and that everything that I had in my mind that I expected to have happen when I talked to them didn't happen. I just always felt I couldn't talk to them for anything maybe in part because I was afraid of how my dad used to be. I don't think there will be as large of a communication barrier between my parents anymore so I guess that's one positive thing that came out of all of this.
Went to the doctor 2/2/06 talked to him for a bit, wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, but it was a little awkward as I had just seen him like a week ago and claimed everything was fine. Basically I'm left with two options, medication or a councilor. While I'm not too keen of either of them, because of our cruise over feburary break the councilor was the quickest way to getting some help. So, I gotta talk to a councilor today at 1:00, by the time you read this though that'll probably be done with. I hope it goes well, I have no idea what to expect, and I must admit it scares me. Maybe I'm not looking forward to talking with a councilor because I just don't like the fact that I need someone else to help me solve my problems, I am rather stubborn like that, so hopefully it won't be too bad.
Found out that deppression/suicidal thoughts have also been an issue for one of my cousins...pretty interesting that I never found out anything about that until today, though I must say it would explain some things. Just her issues went a little farther than mine...Aparently she had attempted suicide multiple times. A little unsettling...
Very busy week as a result of councilling and doctor appointments, and work and school work and such. Was going to tell people all this in person but I just don't have the time to talk to people individually. It was a very emotional draining week for me so far, and I find that any free time I have I've been using to sleep instead of letting everyone know that I'm okay. I don't think I've ever napped this much these past few days after school than I have since I was taking caffine pills, so I'm hoping it's a sign that I'm begining to get back into a normal sleep routine.
Unfortunatly there is no quick fix for this...but something will happen in due time I suppose. Just like to thank those who tried to go beyond the computer screen to help me. So, Thanks Katrina, Shelby, Courtney, Lauren, Emily, Kaitlyn, Stevo, Phil, Nick. I hope I didn't forget anyone...it's late...I mean early in the morning. And of course thanks to all those who've listend and put up with my excessive shit...that list is too long lol. You've all made a difference, who knows where I could've been had I not had such great friends. And of course thanks to my parents if they read this one, and I never meant to cause you two such pain through all of this, I just really thought it would go away.
Basically that's about it. I've read all your guys' entries and caught up I just don't feel like replying to all of them as it would take me quite some time. I kinda ditched this recently.
And now i'm gonna go to bed kthx, and this one is going to fill up some friends page cuse I'm feeling to greedy to shorten it.
Went to the doctor 2/2/06 talked to him for a bit, wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, but it was a little awkward as I had just seen him like a week ago and claimed everything was fine. Basically I'm left with two options, medication or a councilor. While I'm not too keen of either of them, because of our cruise over feburary break the councilor was the quickest way to getting some help. So, I gotta talk to a councilor today at 1:00, by the time you read this though that'll probably be done with. I hope it goes well, I have no idea what to expect, and I must admit it scares me. Maybe I'm not looking forward to talking with a councilor because I just don't like the fact that I need someone else to help me solve my problems, I am rather stubborn like that, so hopefully it won't be too bad.
Found out that deppression/suicidal thoughts have also been an issue for one of my cousins...pretty interesting that I never found out anything about that until today, though I must say it would explain some things. Just her issues went a little farther than mine...Aparently she had attempted suicide multiple times. A little unsettling...
Very busy week as a result of councilling and doctor appointments, and work and school work and such. Was going to tell people all this in person but I just don't have the time to talk to people individually. It was a very emotional draining week for me so far, and I find that any free time I have I've been using to sleep instead of letting everyone know that I'm okay. I don't think I've ever napped this much these past few days after school than I have since I was taking caffine pills, so I'm hoping it's a sign that I'm begining to get back into a normal sleep routine.
Unfortunatly there is no quick fix for this...but something will happen in due time I suppose. Just like to thank those who tried to go beyond the computer screen to help me. So, Thanks Katrina, Shelby, Courtney, Lauren, Emily, Kaitlyn, Stevo, Phil, Nick. I hope I didn't forget anyone...it's late...I mean early in the morning. And of course thanks to all those who've listend and put up with my excessive shit...that list is too long lol. You've all made a difference, who knows where I could've been had I not had such great friends. And of course thanks to my parents if they read this one, and I never meant to cause you two such pain through all of this, I just really thought it would go away.
Basically that's about it. I've read all your guys' entries and caught up I just don't feel like replying to all of them as it would take me quite some time. I kinda ditched this recently.
And now i'm gonna go to bed kthx, and this one is going to fill up some friends page cuse I'm feeling to greedy to shorten it.