On the subject of existence
Still not dead.
Just for the record, I made one resolution in 2014 and one in 2015.
The 2014 resolution was that, on my birthday that year, I'd start gathering the few things I'd need to make sure that I could end myself on or before my birthday of 2015.
My old friends finding me (before my birthday) changed that, or I'd be gone by now.
My 2015 resolution was to live through 2015, to not come up with any new plans to kill myself, or to get any of the things I'd need for the old plans.
I actually kept that one, though unfortunately one of those old friends didn't make it and lost his fight with cancer late in the year.
I didn't make a resolution for this year. Just going to make an effort, maybe two. I still have not been able to maintain pretending I like myself for more than a handful of hours in a day, but even that much is surprising - and a ton of effort. Much the same goes for pretending I don't hate myself.
I am coming up with reasons not to hate myself though, so that one's getting easier.
Just for the record, I made one resolution in 2014 and one in 2015.
The 2014 resolution was that, on my birthday that year, I'd start gathering the few things I'd need to make sure that I could end myself on or before my birthday of 2015.
My old friends finding me (before my birthday) changed that, or I'd be gone by now.
My 2015 resolution was to live through 2015, to not come up with any new plans to kill myself, or to get any of the things I'd need for the old plans.
I actually kept that one, though unfortunately one of those old friends didn't make it and lost his fight with cancer late in the year.
I didn't make a resolution for this year. Just going to make an effort, maybe two. I still have not been able to maintain pretending I like myself for more than a handful of hours in a day, but even that much is surprising - and a ton of effort. Much the same goes for pretending I don't hate myself.
I am coming up with reasons not to hate myself though, so that one's getting easier.