Aug 14, 2006 20:01
Ever had one of those days were the sky falls out of your world and all those things that you've been hiding from yourself or lying to yourself about coming crashing down on you forming a prefect puzzle pieced picture of horror and/or fear?
That's my day today.
The few good points:
Got a call back from a fashion school advisor, who seemed to like me and thinks I have a pretty good shot at getting into her school after I finish my psychology degree.
I have a job interview for a temp job Wednesday.
Now the bed parts.
After months of planning it doesn't look like I'm any closer to moving to NV with my boyfriend.
My best bet at a finishing my psychology degree is to stay at the school I am currently suspended from.
Because unlike other school which wouldn't consider me after my being suspend, I can go back to my current school and continue on with my course work.
Which means staying in TN, which isn't what I wanted at all.
That means by the way, that if Jasyn won't move here we may have to break up. I'm not sure I can do the long distance romance thing for three more years. I don't want to loss Jasyn. He's good to me and good for me. I love him and I'm not sure anyone has ever loved me more. But I can't ask him to put his life on hold for my plans.
And I can't put my life on hold anymore either. Staying here and finishing school after my suspension seems to be what's best for me.
But why does what's best for me mean possibly losing love? God! This isn't a talk I want to have with him.
I don't want to be a grown up anymore! Someone make the ride spin backwards!