(no subject)
My family is beyond wacky. My Family by Magz and Sister Of Magz
Sister of Magz: so what's up with the political campaign?
Magz: dad went out for signatures.
Magz: he needs 25 by friday.
Sister of Magz: and how many does he have so far?
Magz: like - 18.
Sister of Magz: including you, [middle brother], [youngest brother], [youngest brother's wife], [oldest brother], [oldest brother's wife]...
Sister of Magz: [little sister]...
Magz: nope.
Magz: including me.
Magz: [middle brother] isn't a democrat, [oldest brother and wife] don't live in the right district.
Sister of Magz: china doesn't count, does it.
Magz: nope.
Sister of Magz: [MIDDLE BROTHER] ISN'T A DEMOCRAT????
Magz: vassalboro, windsor, and part of augusta.
Magz: he also voted for nader. ::smacks him::
Magz: and he probably will again in november.
Sister of Magz: What party affiliation is he registered with?
Magz: he's 'undecided'.
Sister of Magz: So he would rather have Bush in the office.
Magz: Because a vote for Nader is a vote for bush.
Magz: yup.
Sister of Magz: Have you told him that?
Magz: he doesn't believe me.
Sister of Magz Because Nader doesn't have a SNOWBALL'S CHANCE IN HELL of winning.
Magz: i think nader is hired by the bush campaign.
Sister of Magz: And if he votes for Nader, he may as well be putting his x in the W box.
Sister of Magz: [middle brother] clearly hasn't thought this through.
Magz: pretty much. does he ever?
Sister of Magz: What about [youngest brother]?
Magz: he's signing. and he's a democrat.
Magz: [youngest brother's wife] can't vote. it's against her religion.
Sister of Magz: what exactly is NOT against her religion?
Magz: getting presents.
Sister of Magz: no - because you can't celebrate holidays... can I just give her a random gift?
Sister of Magz: is that what you mean?
Magz: no, she accepts gifts on birthdays and holidays.
Sister of Magz: quite frankly, we have the most SCREWED UP FAMILY.
Magz: she just doesn't give them, because it's against her religion.
Sister of Magz: oh. how CONVENIENT.
Sister of Magz: See... if you just start itemizing.
Magz: lol
Sister of Magz: in our family, we have:
Sister of Magz: 1) a felon coke addict living-at-home-at-30 brother.
Magz: ::check::
Sister of Magz: 2) a know-what-to-say-to-make-the-state-think-I'm-loony-so-I-don't-have-to-work brother.
Magz: ::check::
Sister of Magz: 3) a bunch of cousins who started their own religion and wear kerchiefs.
Magz: yup.
Sister of Magz: 4) the morbidly overweight family
Magz: and jumpers.
Sister of Magz: 5) The cousins that can't move out of [aunt]'s house and they are almost FORTY.
Sister of Magz: What am I missing here?
Magz: i'm sure there's something.
Magz: ::thinks about it::
Sister of Magz: You know, even with [Sister of Magz's husband]'s sister's divorce debaucle, his family is Ozzie and Harriet compared to ours.
Sister of Magz: sometimes i am a little embarrassed around his family as a result.
Magz: why wouldn't you be?
Sister of Magz: There is no good reason why I wouldn't be.
Sister of Magz: You know, the odds were really stacked against me. I should pat myself on the back every day.
Magz: you rock.
Sister of Magz: I could be living at home and snorting coke in the attic of my parents' house.
Sister of Magz: Or living off the state and riding around on a snowmobile that can barely hold me.
Sister of Magz: Or weigh 500 pounds and have to have knee replacement surgery.
Magz: yeah, i'd have to say we both rock.
Sister of Magz: Or (gasp!) have to wear a kerchief and a jumper every day! What kind of a fashion statement would that make? I mean, I live in NEW YORK CITY. I couldn't keep up with the fashionistas here with that get up.
Magz: and sneakers.
Sister of Magz: AND SNEAKERS!
Magz: don't forget the sneakers to go with that ensemble.
Sister of Magz: WHITE ONES.
Sister of Magz: NIIIIIIIIIIIIIICE.
Sister of Magz: I am shocked that hasn't made the cover of Cosmo, to tell you the truth.
Sister of Magz: so what's up with the political campaign?
Magz: dad went out for signatures.
Magz: he needs 25 by friday.
Sister of Magz: and how many does he have so far?
Magz: like - 18.
Sister of Magz: including you, [middle brother], [youngest brother], [youngest brother's wife], [oldest brother], [oldest brother's wife]...
Sister of Magz: [little sister]...
Magz: nope.
Magz: including me.
Magz: [middle brother] isn't a democrat, [oldest brother and wife] don't live in the right district.
Sister of Magz: china doesn't count, does it.
Magz: nope.
Sister of Magz: [MIDDLE BROTHER] ISN'T A DEMOCRAT????
Magz: vassalboro, windsor, and part of augusta.
Magz: he also voted for nader. ::smacks him::
Magz: and he probably will again in november.
Sister of Magz: What party affiliation is he registered with?
Magz: he's 'undecided'.
Sister of Magz: So he would rather have Bush in the office.
Magz: Because a vote for Nader is a vote for bush.
Magz: yup.
Sister of Magz: Have you told him that?
Magz: he doesn't believe me.
Sister of Magz Because Nader doesn't have a SNOWBALL'S CHANCE IN HELL of winning.
Magz: i think nader is hired by the bush campaign.
Sister of Magz: And if he votes for Nader, he may as well be putting his x in the W box.
Sister of Magz: [middle brother] clearly hasn't thought this through.
Magz: pretty much. does he ever?
Sister of Magz: What about [youngest brother]?
Magz: he's signing. and he's a democrat.
Magz: [youngest brother's wife] can't vote. it's against her religion.
Sister of Magz: what exactly is NOT against her religion?
Magz: getting presents.
Sister of Magz: no - because you can't celebrate holidays... can I just give her a random gift?
Sister of Magz: is that what you mean?
Magz: no, she accepts gifts on birthdays and holidays.
Sister of Magz: quite frankly, we have the most SCREWED UP FAMILY.
Magz: she just doesn't give them, because it's against her religion.
Sister of Magz: oh. how CONVENIENT.
Sister of Magz: See... if you just start itemizing.
Magz: lol
Sister of Magz: in our family, we have:
Sister of Magz: 1) a felon coke addict living-at-home-at-30 brother.
Magz: ::check::
Sister of Magz: 2) a know-what-to-say-to-make-the-state-think-I'm-loony-so-I-don't-have-to-work brother.
Magz: ::check::
Sister of Magz: 3) a bunch of cousins who started their own religion and wear kerchiefs.
Magz: yup.
Sister of Magz: 4) the morbidly overweight family
Magz: and jumpers.
Sister of Magz: 5) The cousins that can't move out of [aunt]'s house and they are almost FORTY.
Sister of Magz: What am I missing here?
Magz: i'm sure there's something.
Magz: ::thinks about it::
Sister of Magz: You know, even with [Sister of Magz's husband]'s sister's divorce debaucle, his family is Ozzie and Harriet compared to ours.
Sister of Magz: sometimes i am a little embarrassed around his family as a result.
Magz: why wouldn't you be?
Sister of Magz: There is no good reason why I wouldn't be.
Sister of Magz: You know, the odds were really stacked against me. I should pat myself on the back every day.
Magz: you rock.
Sister of Magz: I could be living at home and snorting coke in the attic of my parents' house.
Sister of Magz: Or living off the state and riding around on a snowmobile that can barely hold me.
Sister of Magz: Or weigh 500 pounds and have to have knee replacement surgery.
Magz: yeah, i'd have to say we both rock.
Sister of Magz: Or (gasp!) have to wear a kerchief and a jumper every day! What kind of a fashion statement would that make? I mean, I live in NEW YORK CITY. I couldn't keep up with the fashionistas here with that get up.
Magz: and sneakers.
Sister of Magz: AND SNEAKERS!
Magz: don't forget the sneakers to go with that ensemble.
Sister of Magz: WHITE ONES.
Sister of Magz: NIIIIIIIIIIIIIICE.
Sister of Magz: I am shocked that hasn't made the cover of Cosmo, to tell you the truth.