(( erm.. what the hell ))

[sparklerockstar]

hahaha.. have you guys seen that one commercial.. with the werid sock thing while its singing 'run to the hills'? That commercial like kills me everytime man hehe. Anyways today was a half day. We didnt do anything. Bleeeaaah. Came home talked to Leesh on the phone.. then Josh called and i talked to him for like 5 minitues til Opa got here and got all pissy with me. Cuz well he hates that i drive. He absolutley hates it. He hates everything about me it hurts, i just want to make him like me for who i am. He hates i am like my daddy. *tear* i wont go into it. I dont want to. SO yeah.. Mikey noticed i was upset hes like you okay? im like where's the bass? lol. I tried a 5 - string bass. Didn't get far though, after about a half an hour i just was like aw fuck it. And went and played my drums. By the way, i talked my mom into getting me a 7 piece drum set whoo hoo! hehe so i played for a few hours... then i fell asleep on the chair and layed my head on the speaker for Aarons guitar amp so they gave an hour to sleep then the fuckers decided.. hey! lets be assholes and turn the speakers all the way up and wake up Crystal!.... assholes lol. I was uh yeah pretty pissed lol. They were out of all alcohol. I could have used some.. like really lol. Mom picked me up. And she bitched at me about like everything i do wrong. I CANT HELP THAT IM NOT PERFECT! and that im not what they wanted me to be. My fucking mom wanted me dead! (try living with knowing that). Who knows.. maybe my dah didnt want me to be like this? but i guess ill never know. cuz he left me here. Im sorry im like ranting... but i miss him. its may.. soon.. will be 9 years. Ive lived 9 years without him. i dont want to talk about my dah. It makes me sad. Tomarrow is Ed's birthday. So yay! i plan on spending the day with him... except well during school. I talked to Josh today.. i feel really bad, cuz i went a little insane on him tonight. Well okay... i went all psycho on him. I might call him back and like apologize. All though he wasnt being totally helpful himself. I know my faults and i know im young. I dont need anyone i love telling me that anymore. But he did help me nonetheless. Well i think thats all i have to say for today huh? long entry. you better comment.
love you squashie :)

*Tootles* \m/