(no subject)
last week was a terrible week...
the worst.
we had penny put to sleep on wednesday...
i carried her in... we all walked in knowing that it was the end..
all bawling our eyes out..
and we all stroked her, kissed her and said goodbye to her...
she was gone before the injection was finished..
thats how weak she was..
it still makes me cry...
i couldnt do anything on wednesday..
i came home and it was horrible..
mum and i needed to get out of the house, so we went food shopping..
i cried all the way around..
but i didnt care...
it was such a weird day...
knowing that she has always been there..when u come into the house, and see her face... u got followed around everywhere u went..caus she didnt want to be on her own, but it was a struggle for her to keep following you...u ended up just staying where u were, so she didnt have to move..
u kinda take them for granted... u know that their there.. u rely on them being there to say hello when u get home..
and for the past week.. i keep doing the routine things...
i came in from work and as i put my key in the door, my mum pulled up and reversed into the drive way...and i held the door closed.. just incase she darted out to say hello... but she wasnt there...
when u put the others into their kennels for the nite, u open the back door, for her last wee... u prepare 3 food bowels when theres only two...
its so weird...
i keep hearing her too... i know thats weird.. but i can feel her about..
we have had her cremated...she should be back home this week..
i know its weird, i know im talking about a dog...
but she is like the first thing i know...my first real memory was going to get her, just before christmas...so tiny she sat in my dads hand all curled up...
and i wanted to call her assemberly..caus i just started school, and loved the early morning welcome to the day, school assemberlys..
i have had her since i was 4.. she is like part of the family..
and its heartbreaking to know i can never stroke her again..
i keep saying this, i know its weird...
but dogs are my thing..
not only that, but me righty has gone away to shroppy...
and i guess u kinda take advantage of your mates, i know i have...
because u know,, no matter what they are only like 5/10mins away from u..
even if u dont see them much, u know they r there..
but hazza has gone away now, and u know that u wont be able to see them when u want to..
but i shall be going to see her in the half term...
and im so glad she is happy... so so glad..
we have been txting each other more times in this last week, then we have, put together in the last few months..
we had a bit of an emotional meet up on tuesday nite...
i feel quite bad coz i was thinking of other things too...
i cried my eyes out..
but hopefully it will be my time to shine soon..
i feel a lil, not left out, caus uni isnt my thing, i know that... but a bit behind...
i havent been doing much recently, and its stoopid to think that i have been out and about more recently because its kinda like the last times that everyone is together...thats stupid...
i want to come out more with u guys..
and im sorry i have been so shitty..
i felt really outta place on thursday, wehn we went to hertford..but thats my own fault, caus i have never made that effort before...
but i relaxed a lot by the end.. and just thought to myself..
these are my friends..
hmm.
the worst.
we had penny put to sleep on wednesday...
i carried her in... we all walked in knowing that it was the end..
all bawling our eyes out..
and we all stroked her, kissed her and said goodbye to her...
she was gone before the injection was finished..
thats how weak she was..
it still makes me cry...
i couldnt do anything on wednesday..
i came home and it was horrible..
mum and i needed to get out of the house, so we went food shopping..
i cried all the way around..
but i didnt care...
it was such a weird day...
knowing that she has always been there..when u come into the house, and see her face... u got followed around everywhere u went..caus she didnt want to be on her own, but it was a struggle for her to keep following you...u ended up just staying where u were, so she didnt have to move..
u kinda take them for granted... u know that their there.. u rely on them being there to say hello when u get home..
and for the past week.. i keep doing the routine things...
i came in from work and as i put my key in the door, my mum pulled up and reversed into the drive way...and i held the door closed.. just incase she darted out to say hello... but she wasnt there...
when u put the others into their kennels for the nite, u open the back door, for her last wee... u prepare 3 food bowels when theres only two...
its so weird...
i keep hearing her too... i know thats weird.. but i can feel her about..
we have had her cremated...she should be back home this week..
i know its weird, i know im talking about a dog...
but she is like the first thing i know...my first real memory was going to get her, just before christmas...so tiny she sat in my dads hand all curled up...
and i wanted to call her assemberly..caus i just started school, and loved the early morning welcome to the day, school assemberlys..
i have had her since i was 4.. she is like part of the family..
and its heartbreaking to know i can never stroke her again..
i keep saying this, i know its weird...
but dogs are my thing..
not only that, but me righty has gone away to shroppy...
and i guess u kinda take advantage of your mates, i know i have...
because u know,, no matter what they are only like 5/10mins away from u..
even if u dont see them much, u know they r there..
but hazza has gone away now, and u know that u wont be able to see them when u want to..
but i shall be going to see her in the half term...
and im so glad she is happy... so so glad..
we have been txting each other more times in this last week, then we have, put together in the last few months..
we had a bit of an emotional meet up on tuesday nite...
i feel quite bad coz i was thinking of other things too...
i cried my eyes out..
but hopefully it will be my time to shine soon..
i feel a lil, not left out, caus uni isnt my thing, i know that... but a bit behind...
i havent been doing much recently, and its stoopid to think that i have been out and about more recently because its kinda like the last times that everyone is together...thats stupid...
i want to come out more with u guys..
and im sorry i have been so shitty..
i felt really outta place on thursday, wehn we went to hertford..but thats my own fault, caus i have never made that effort before...
but i relaxed a lot by the end.. and just thought to myself..
these are my friends..
hmm.