Just Conversing with Hobos in a Subway Parking Lot
That's how I do. Or I did. In Albuquerque. Pa went in to get some food, I stayed in my car with my cat. Next thing I knew, there was a homeless dude knocking on the window. I rolled it down ever so slightly, thinking I might be getting a switchblade in my face, but he just talked for 100 hours. Then he asked for some money after my dad came out and gave me my sandwich. Then I pointed to my dad in his truck, and told him he was the one with the money. Mr. Hobo went knocking on Pa's window then. Pa didn't give him anything, so Mr. Hobo came right back and told me just that. Then he asked if he could have some of my Cheez-Its. I said it was empty (not true). Dad was finally pulling out at that point, so I was like, "Sir, step away from the vehicle so I can back out. I have to follow that truck." Then he told me to have a good trip. Pretty normal stuff.
So I made it to Arizona and so did my cat, even though he went to the bathroom in the car on the first day and I almost killed him for it. Just kidding! About the almost killing him part, he did go to the bathroom all over the towel in his kennel. But I didn't have to touch that towel once...I made my dad do that.
But dad is gone, and now I've started working...kind of. We had a meet and greet last Monday night, and after that, someone quit. I guess she didn't like the salad. Then we had orientation for 3 days. The 1st day was terrible because it was 45 hours. But then we were treated to Olive Garden. The next day we visited places and I burned in the back of Sister Carmen's car, because we were all too polite (and/or stupid) to ask her to point the vents towards us. It was over 100 degrees outside and in the car it was like 200 to us in the backseat. When I got home that day, on the verge of heat stroke, I stripped and jumped in the pool. I can't really say it was refreshing because the water was not cool. Luckily the next day, she must have seen me putting my water bottle to my face in the rear view mirror, so she finally turned the vents towards us. I was like, "So Sister Carmen, is this heaven?" Because it was just that wonderful.
This week I started work. But not really. I mean, I haven't done anything besides make a brochure, sit around and pretend to do work, and go to a meeting. Next week will be terrible though, at least Tuesday, because I have to learn how to do something, go to a 2 hour meeting, AND go to a school and recruit kids. That doesn't really look like that much when I write it, but it is because I'm probably going to have to work the full 8 hours that day. That's like a full-time job people. And that means I have to go to 3 different places all for 1 job. That ain't right. The next week will be even worse though, because I'll actually have to work with kids. And they're not really kids. They're pre-teens. Some of the worst beings on the planet. AND one of the schools I'm going to be at is in the one part of the city everybody says to stay away from because it is capital G-H-E-T-T-O. But I'm a gangsta, so y'know, I have that going for me.
So I made it to Arizona and so did my cat, even though he went to the bathroom in the car on the first day and I almost killed him for it. Just kidding! About the almost killing him part, he did go to the bathroom all over the towel in his kennel. But I didn't have to touch that towel once...I made my dad do that.
But dad is gone, and now I've started working...kind of. We had a meet and greet last Monday night, and after that, someone quit. I guess she didn't like the salad. Then we had orientation for 3 days. The 1st day was terrible because it was 45 hours. But then we were treated to Olive Garden. The next day we visited places and I burned in the back of Sister Carmen's car, because we were all too polite (and/or stupid) to ask her to point the vents towards us. It was over 100 degrees outside and in the car it was like 200 to us in the backseat. When I got home that day, on the verge of heat stroke, I stripped and jumped in the pool. I can't really say it was refreshing because the water was not cool. Luckily the next day, she must have seen me putting my water bottle to my face in the rear view mirror, so she finally turned the vents towards us. I was like, "So Sister Carmen, is this heaven?" Because it was just that wonderful.
This week I started work. But not really. I mean, I haven't done anything besides make a brochure, sit around and pretend to do work, and go to a meeting. Next week will be terrible though, at least Tuesday, because I have to learn how to do something, go to a 2 hour meeting, AND go to a school and recruit kids. That doesn't really look like that much when I write it, but it is because I'm probably going to have to work the full 8 hours that day. That's like a full-time job people. And that means I have to go to 3 different places all for 1 job. That ain't right. The next week will be even worse though, because I'll actually have to work with kids. And they're not really kids. They're pre-teens. Some of the worst beings on the planet. AND one of the schools I'm going to be at is in the one part of the city everybody says to stay away from because it is capital G-H-E-T-T-O. But I'm a gangsta, so y'know, I have that going for me.