ohblahdee...
My friend Charlie called me out of the blue yesterday in the middle of our Moving Sale, but we managed to get back in touch today. It turns out he may be following in my footsteps if he can't find work soon.
We had to laugh at ourselves after about 45 minutes of conversation. We started out the phone call on this bright, happy mood and ended up with us wondering if we could somehow rig the shotgun to take both of us out with only one blast. (We were kidding, but were discussing some unpleasant things.)
It made me think. You know, life is hard, but it's hard for everyone. As Simon and Garfunkle sang, "I don't know a soul that's not been battered, I don't have a friend who feels at ease..."
Well, except for my friend Jill, who will miss my going-away party because she's on vacation in Hawaii right now. She's excused.
But my point is that no one's life is a Pony Farm. We can't stop things we'd rather not happen in life from happening to us. But we can change ourselves. For me, that means realizing that the things I fear so much are just fears. If something is going to happen, being afraid of it isn't going to make it not happen. So why be afraid? Enjoying the things I can enjoy (friendships, family, art, and so forth) when and as they happen is better by far than trying to cling to the same things out of fear (which doesn't help my art, and probably just pisses my friends and peers off).
I'm not saying that I should just put a poultice on my pain and pretend that it doesn't hurt. That's neither honest nor helpful. But I can try and keep my perspective, even in the midst of my pain. So instead of pain reinforcing the fears I'm nurturing, my pain makes me more keenly aware of the joys and blessings I can still enjoy, and look forward to the promise of new joys to come.
I started meditating again today. I hope to make it a part of my morning routine, as I tend to feel the most stress (if my reflux is any indication) right after I wake up.
I've become very aware recently of just how much I've let fear drive my life, and sap the enjoyment from it... it's one of the contributing factors to my lack of posts that are not sketchblogs. Well, I want to enjoy life again. I know it's a process, not a switch that you throw, so wish me luck, or pray for me, or send calming energy my way. I'm picking up my spoon and am going to start eating this particular elephant.
The Lord lift up His countenance to you all, and give you peace.
We had to laugh at ourselves after about 45 minutes of conversation. We started out the phone call on this bright, happy mood and ended up with us wondering if we could somehow rig the shotgun to take both of us out with only one blast. (We were kidding, but were discussing some unpleasant things.)
It made me think. You know, life is hard, but it's hard for everyone. As Simon and Garfunkle sang, "I don't know a soul that's not been battered, I don't have a friend who feels at ease..."
Well, except for my friend Jill, who will miss my going-away party because she's on vacation in Hawaii right now. She's excused.
But my point is that no one's life is a Pony Farm. We can't stop things we'd rather not happen in life from happening to us. But we can change ourselves. For me, that means realizing that the things I fear so much are just fears. If something is going to happen, being afraid of it isn't going to make it not happen. So why be afraid? Enjoying the things I can enjoy (friendships, family, art, and so forth) when and as they happen is better by far than trying to cling to the same things out of fear (which doesn't help my art, and probably just pisses my friends and peers off).
I'm not saying that I should just put a poultice on my pain and pretend that it doesn't hurt. That's neither honest nor helpful. But I can try and keep my perspective, even in the midst of my pain. So instead of pain reinforcing the fears I'm nurturing, my pain makes me more keenly aware of the joys and blessings I can still enjoy, and look forward to the promise of new joys to come.
I started meditating again today. I hope to make it a part of my morning routine, as I tend to feel the most stress (if my reflux is any indication) right after I wake up.
I've become very aware recently of just how much I've let fear drive my life, and sap the enjoyment from it... it's one of the contributing factors to my lack of posts that are not sketchblogs. Well, I want to enjoy life again. I know it's a process, not a switch that you throw, so wish me luck, or pray for me, or send calming energy my way. I'm picking up my spoon and am going to start eating this particular elephant.
The Lord lift up His countenance to you all, and give you peace.