(no subject)
it's been a long time since I've written here. School has been insanely busy, and I don't have much free time anymore, since I have a lot of other obligations on top of everything else.
Life has been good in some regards, less so in others. Nothing like graduate school to make you feel like you are a failure at everything you do. I'm hoping this is only a phase, and once I pass the prelim exam I'll feel a little bit better. But I feel burnt out and useless a lot of the time. And questioning what I'm going to do with myself in 5 years or so. Also wondering how I am really contributing to society. I think my problem is, I care too much about how the world perceives me, and I don't have enough confidence in myself and what I am doing. And that's easier said than fixed.
I really just need a vacation, even though I went on one for Christmas. Which was amazing. I went to Greece, and we visited Athens, Delphi, Thessaloniki and Samos. Samos was my favorite, a classic Mediterranean island. But everything was beautiful. I would have preferred a little less stress during the trip, but that was out of our hands for the most part. Being stranded in the Newark airport for 30 hours is pretty hellish, as is having no luggage for 3 days. But we still had a great time and did our best to not let anything bother us. I may be going to Chile this summer for a week, and maybe going to Europe for a few days too... I just want to leave and travel for an extended period of time.
Looking forward to getting home for Easter too, since I haven't been home since Thanksgiving. Easter is always tough because dad died on Good Friday, so I like being around family. I will sure need the break then, because it'll be a month before prelims too.
Life has been good in some regards, less so in others. Nothing like graduate school to make you feel like you are a failure at everything you do. I'm hoping this is only a phase, and once I pass the prelim exam I'll feel a little bit better. But I feel burnt out and useless a lot of the time. And questioning what I'm going to do with myself in 5 years or so. Also wondering how I am really contributing to society. I think my problem is, I care too much about how the world perceives me, and I don't have enough confidence in myself and what I am doing. And that's easier said than fixed.
I really just need a vacation, even though I went on one for Christmas. Which was amazing. I went to Greece, and we visited Athens, Delphi, Thessaloniki and Samos. Samos was my favorite, a classic Mediterranean island. But everything was beautiful. I would have preferred a little less stress during the trip, but that was out of our hands for the most part. Being stranded in the Newark airport for 30 hours is pretty hellish, as is having no luggage for 3 days. But we still had a great time and did our best to not let anything bother us. I may be going to Chile this summer for a week, and maybe going to Europe for a few days too... I just want to leave and travel for an extended period of time.
Looking forward to getting home for Easter too, since I haven't been home since Thanksgiving. Easter is always tough because dad died on Good Friday, so I like being around family. I will sure need the break then, because it'll be a month before prelims too.