My So-Called Friends
I heard that Lon's goin' home today...and quite frankly, I think that's fuckin' shitty. I finally get a chance to see my like, one true friend, whom I feel I can trust & get along with...only to see her one day. I feel so hurt, so alone...a girl with no girl friends has a had life- trust me I'd know...I am one. Like, I was hoping she'd say bye or something at least, ya know? I dunno- & then Charlie's tellin' me now that when him & Lon hung out, it was her that said, "No, don't call Lyss." I cried all day, even though I highly doubt it's true. But still, to think that there's a chance it could be makes me wanna die. It's like, what the fuck happened to me? Where are all the people I used to have so much fun with? I suppose I'm just lame now or something (I beginning to hate myself so much that I wanna stay in bed all day, just embarrassed). Well, the fact of the matter is- Whether it was Charlie, Jiovani, Lon, or Anne, it has to be one of them- & knowing that is what's making me cry rite now. I care about all of them, my friends, so fucking much- & I just don't think they could say the same. Fuccck, all I want is a homie. It may sound funny, but I'm miserable & I need someone to care, understand, and listen. I so wish I could've seen Lon once more. *loong ass sigh*...
Oh yea, I'm getting avicted from my apartment. Goodbye any chance I had to be content and hellllllo streets!!
My life is a beautiful disaster. Just like me...