(no subject)
A cardiologist marries a gynecologist and were blessed with twin girls.
Guess what they name them - Angina and Vagina.
*****
Two sperms are swimming really hard and one asks, "Are we almost at uterus?."
"Nah!" says the other, "we just passed the tonsil".
****
A prostitute goes to deposit a $100 bill in a bank. The teller says,
"Sorry, madam, the note is fake". "Oh no!" exclaimed the prostitute, "I have
been raped".
****
A woman gave birth to six babies and on seeing this she got out off
hospital bed and slapped her husband and shouted, "I told you not to go doggy
style".
*****
Man went to the chemist to buy one fourth Viagra. Chemist said that it
would be useless. Man said, "I am 70, sex is out of question, I just want to
stop peeing on my shoes".
*****
Secretary said publicly that you have a small penis, would you comment on this?
"The truth is that she has a big mouth".
******
A Japanese girl accidentally lets out a big fart after making love.
She said, "Aww, so sorry... exkooz me pleazo, Front hole so happy back
hole laugh out loud".
*****
What is common between a swimming pool and a wife - for both we pay
high maintenance for the little time we spend in them.
****
Love is a complicated machinery. But sometimes all you need is a good
screw to fix it.
****
Sex is like a card game. If you don't have a good partner, you better
have a good hand.
*******
What's the difference! between biology and sociology? When the baby
looks like his dad or mom, the it is biology. When the baby looks like the
neighbor, then it is sociology.
*****
What is the useless piece of flesh attached to the penis called -The
Man.
******
Whoever first said that "A dog is man's best friend" had never seen a
pussy before.
*******
Why is breast milk good for health?
Because it is great for blood circulation, provides heat, is refreshing
and comes in attractive containers.
******
Dracula asked God, "May I be reincarnated as a white angel with wings
and still suck blood?"
God said, "Okay, I will turn you into a sanitary pad".
********
Why was two-piece bikini invented?
To separate meat section from the dairy section.
********
All men are terr! orists. They always attack women on their twin towers
and destroy their pentagon.
******
Man was lying nude on the beach. A sexy babe starts playing tabla(drums)on
his butt.
Man: What are you doing?
Girl: Playing tabla(drums). Man turns over and says, "Can you play flute?"
******
Mother was scolding the daughter, "I don't like the guy you are going
out with. He is too dumb". "No, momma," she said, "He is going to be a doctor and he has already cured me of that illness that I used to have every month"
Guess what they name them - Angina and Vagina.
*****
Two sperms are swimming really hard and one asks, "Are we almost at uterus?."
"Nah!" says the other, "we just passed the tonsil".
****
A prostitute goes to deposit a $100 bill in a bank. The teller says,
"Sorry, madam, the note is fake". "Oh no!" exclaimed the prostitute, "I have
been raped".
****
A woman gave birth to six babies and on seeing this she got out off
hospital bed and slapped her husband and shouted, "I told you not to go doggy
style".
*****
Man went to the chemist to buy one fourth Viagra. Chemist said that it
would be useless. Man said, "I am 70, sex is out of question, I just want to
stop peeing on my shoes".
*****
Secretary said publicly that you have a small penis, would you comment on this?
"The truth is that she has a big mouth".
******
A Japanese girl accidentally lets out a big fart after making love.
She said, "Aww, so sorry... exkooz me pleazo, Front hole so happy back
hole laugh out loud".
*****
What is common between a swimming pool and a wife - for both we pay
high maintenance for the little time we spend in them.
****
Love is a complicated machinery. But sometimes all you need is a good
screw to fix it.
****
Sex is like a card game. If you don't have a good partner, you better
have a good hand.
*******
What's the difference! between biology and sociology? When the baby
looks like his dad or mom, the it is biology. When the baby looks like the
neighbor, then it is sociology.
*****
What is the useless piece of flesh attached to the penis called -The
Man.
******
Whoever first said that "A dog is man's best friend" had never seen a
pussy before.
*******
Why is breast milk good for health?
Because it is great for blood circulation, provides heat, is refreshing
and comes in attractive containers.
******
Dracula asked God, "May I be reincarnated as a white angel with wings
and still suck blood?"
God said, "Okay, I will turn you into a sanitary pad".
********
Why was two-piece bikini invented?
To separate meat section from the dairy section.
********
All men are terr! orists. They always attack women on their twin towers
and destroy their pentagon.
******
Man was lying nude on the beach. A sexy babe starts playing tabla(drums)on
his butt.
Man: What are you doing?
Girl: Playing tabla(drums). Man turns over and says, "Can you play flute?"
******
Mother was scolding the daughter, "I don't like the guy you are going
out with. He is too dumb". "No, momma," she said, "He is going to be a doctor and he has already cured me of that illness that I used to have every month"