Stalking Made Simple
If there are two things that I can conclude from my hours of wasted time spent on the internet they are one...
People secretly LOVE to be stalked. I don't think I'm drawing too much from my evidence. With all of the sites like myspace and facebook and programs like Instant Messenger, the internet is basically an "Idiot's Guide to Stalking."
and two...
People secretly LOVE to stalk. There is a whole new brand of stalking born out of the internet. Let's face it you all are guilty, you are reading my online journal aren't you? Granted I am posting it on the web for everyone to see, which if anything proves that I myself am guilty of my first point... and there are probably a total of 4 people that are actually reading this so my population size that I'm deriving my results from would be unacceptable on any poll standards BUT...
I still have much more evidence than just my online journal readers. How many of you have sat on the computer and read the profiles of complete strangers on sites like myspace or friendster or something like that? Where else can I see 25 different pictures of some mysterious girl named 'Miss Jillian Sara'? Where else can I find out 'Rhymes with George's'* top 93 favorite bands? (I honestly think he was making some of these bands up) I don't even have this kind of info on my best friends!
My favorite stalking tool has to be the instant messanger. If there's one statistic that I don't want God to throw my way when I get to the pearly gates it has to be the amount of hours of my life I've wasted reading other people's away messages. That would probably really bum me out. "Andy...I guess it's pretty bad that you've got a crap load of sins listed here on your Omnisciencspace profile but even worse...you've spent one third of your life reading away messages..."
I love the people who always put up exactly where they are at at all times during the day. Those people are screaming for that special stalker to come stalk them wherever they are.
10-10:30--Psychology Class 103 Miller Hall
10:30-1:42--Walking down the sidewalk next to the quad unless class was held over. In that case adjust accordingly
1:42-2:25--Eating lunch (probably a turkey sandwich) at BW 3's (by myself...come stalk)
2:25-2:29--Bathroom (I'm pretty regular)
... and so on...
I rreally like the obnoxiously sentimental away messages. I live for those. It's always the same people too, you can always count on them to deliver a tear jerker or some life-changing quote. You can put the most profound quote ever uttered into an away message and the profundity is systematically reduced to that of a fortune cookie.
I hope this entry stimulates some stalking of my own....I won't lie, I like it.
People secretly LOVE to be stalked. I don't think I'm drawing too much from my evidence. With all of the sites like myspace and facebook and programs like Instant Messenger, the internet is basically an "Idiot's Guide to Stalking."
and two...
People secretly LOVE to stalk. There is a whole new brand of stalking born out of the internet. Let's face it you all are guilty, you are reading my online journal aren't you? Granted I am posting it on the web for everyone to see, which if anything proves that I myself am guilty of my first point... and there are probably a total of 4 people that are actually reading this so my population size that I'm deriving my results from would be unacceptable on any poll standards BUT...
I still have much more evidence than just my online journal readers. How many of you have sat on the computer and read the profiles of complete strangers on sites like myspace or friendster or something like that? Where else can I see 25 different pictures of some mysterious girl named 'Miss Jillian Sara'? Where else can I find out 'Rhymes with George's'* top 93 favorite bands? (I honestly think he was making some of these bands up) I don't even have this kind of info on my best friends!
My favorite stalking tool has to be the instant messanger. If there's one statistic that I don't want God to throw my way when I get to the pearly gates it has to be the amount of hours of my life I've wasted reading other people's away messages. That would probably really bum me out. "Andy...I guess it's pretty bad that you've got a crap load of sins listed here on your Omnisciencspace profile but even worse...you've spent one third of your life reading away messages..."
I love the people who always put up exactly where they are at at all times during the day. Those people are screaming for that special stalker to come stalk them wherever they are.
10-10:30--Psychology Class 103 Miller Hall
10:30-1:42--Walking down the sidewalk next to the quad unless class was held over. In that case adjust accordingly
1:42-2:25--Eating lunch (probably a turkey sandwich) at BW 3's (by myself...come stalk)
2:25-2:29--Bathroom (I'm pretty regular)
... and so on...
I rreally like the obnoxiously sentimental away messages. I live for those. It's always the same people too, you can always count on them to deliver a tear jerker or some life-changing quote. You can put the most profound quote ever uttered into an away message and the profundity is systematically reduced to that of a fortune cookie.
I hope this entry stimulates some stalking of my own....I won't lie, I like it.