Fic: Under the Influence (SGA, John/Rodney, NC-17)
Title: Under the Influence
Author: Sandy
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Pairing: John/Rodney, First Time
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: ~4,700
Spoilers: Season 2.4, Duet, Season 3.3, Irresistible
Disclaimer: As much as I would love to own John & Rodney, alas I do not. I only make them have sex.
Warnings: None
Summary: John and Rodney decide to conduct a 'controlled experiment'.
A/N: Many thanks to seperis for coming up with the plot bunny that this fic is based on, and for allowing me to run with it.
One piece of dialogue and interaction is taken directly from Irresistible.
I'm also using this for the smut_69 community Prompt #29, Submissive, even though it may be stretching it a little to actually fit. But hey, my D/s creds are pretty much non-existent.
My John/Rodney Table
____________________
John trotted after Rodney and caught up with him outside his quarters.
"Rodney," he called out, and was surprised when Rodney flinched before turning around to face him. Rodney's chin went up in that defensive manner he had, and John frowned.
"Sheppard," Rodney said. "Something I can do for you?"
"I just wanted to make sure you were okay," John said and reached up and squeezed Rodney's arm. Rodney flinched again and pulled back away from his touch.
"Yes, yes, I'm fine. Thank you for asking." His eyes looked everywhere but at John.
John looked at him doubtfully. "Are you sure? You're still acting kind of weird."
Rodney closed his eyes, swallowed, and then opened his eyes again, this time looking at John.
"It's just..." He licked his lips. "Look, I know you were depending on me to help you find a solution, and I tried to stay away from him, but-"
"Hey," John said, interrupting him. "It wasn't your fault, Rodney. Hell, if Ronon held me against a wall, I doubt I would have been able to get free either. He didn't hurt you, did he?"
"No, of course not," Rodney said, but his eyes had taken on that suspiciously glassy look they got when he was experiencing a great deal of inner turmoil. "I wasn't hurt, but when I think of what could have happened to you..."
"Well, I wasn't hurt either," John said soothingly.
"But you could have been," Rodney said brokenly. "For god's sake, Sheppard. Ronon shot you!"
John shrugged and tried to lighten the mood. "He stunned me. It hurt a little, but I'm okay."
Rodney stared at him with an incredulous expression on his face. "Don't you get it? We would have done anything Lucius wanted. We would have, would have..."
John's eyes widened when Rodney choked on his words.
"Hey, buddy," John said rubbing Rodney's arm lightly. "You know you wouldn't have done anything like what you're thinking."
Rodney jerked back from him. "You don't understand! I had no will of my own. None. It was worse than when Cadman was in my head and taking over control of my body, because it was only me, and I didn't even care. Do you know what my only concern was when I saw you lying on the ground? That we'd have to carry you back to the puddle jumper. That was it. That was my big concern. You have absolutely no idea what it was like being under that herb's influence."
John was a little taken aback by just how distressed Rodney was over what had happened. He was right though; John didn't understand exactly what the others had gone through, and perhaps he should. He came to a decision.
"Then maybe I should find out."
"What?"
John reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out one of the vials that he'd gotten from Lucius's wives.
"My cold's almost gone," he said holding out the vial. "Drink a bit of this and then breathe on me."
Rodney stepped back away from the vial as if it were a venomous snake. "Are you nuts?" he exclaimed. "I'm not using that on you. Get rid of it."
John sighed. "You said I had no idea what it was like, and you're right. Just drink it, breathe on me, and then I'll understand what you went though."
Rodney crossed his arms over his chest and lifted his chin. "No."
"Dammit, McKay," John said getting ready to argue his case.
"Why do you want to do this?" Rodney asked, his arms flailing about. "Do you have a secret desire to be someone's slave? Believe me, it's not as much fun as it looks in porn."
"What? No," John said though his cock twitched just a little at the suggestion. "I'm just...curious."
"Curious," Rodney said flatly.
"Yeah. I really want to understand what everyone went through. Look, it'll be a controlled experiment."
"And when Elizabeth finds out about this 'controlled experiment'?" Rodney asked sarcastically.
"She doesn't need to find out," John said cajolingly. "No one else even needs to know." Rodney still looked stubbornly resistant so John brought out the big guns. "I trust you, Rodney."
Rodney folded like a house of cards.
"Fine," he sighed. He turned and slapped the panel to open the door to his quarters. "But if you insist on doing this, let's not do it in a public corridor, all right?"
John followed Rodney into his quarters and looked around in surprise.
"Housekeeper's week off, McKay?" he asked dryly. Soiled clothes were thrown about haphazardly, PowerBar wrappers and Ancient doodads covered every surface, and the bed was unmade with the blanket and top sheet half hanging off the side and lying puddled on the floor.
"Yes, well, I've been very busy saving both the Pegasus and the Milky Way Galaxies, so excuse me if my quarters fall below Good Housekeeping standards," McKay replied snappishly.
"Hey," John said holding up his hands in surrender. "I wasn't criticizing; just making a comment. They're your quarters. You can live like a slob if you want to."
He grinned when Rodney glared at him. Then Rodney's eyes dropped to the vial John was still holding and he sighed.
"Are you sure you want to do this? There's really no need. You can just take my word that you'll have no will of your own. All you'll want to do is please me, and do whatever I suggest. I could make you do any evil thing I wanted."
John closed his eyes as if pained. "Thanks a lot, McKay. Now you have me picturing you in a Catwoman costume, and believe me, it's not a pretty sight."
"Oh yes, Sheppard. Ha, ha. Very funny."
John grinned at his friend and then sobered. "Come on, Rodney. Let's do this," he said and held the vial out to Rodney. Rodney hesitated, and then with slumped shoulders took it from John.
"I'm going to be in so much trouble if Elizabeth finds out," he said before he uncorked it and took a small swallow. John had to grin at the grimace Rodney made when he tasted the elixir. Rodney recapped the bottle and set in down in one of the few clear spaces on his desk.
"I don't know how long it's going to take before it become effective," Rodney said not looking at John.
"Well, breathe on me and see if anything happens.
Rodney made a moue of displeasure and then said, "Maybe I should go gargle first."
John rolled his eyes, "Rodney," he said. "You don't have bad breath. Just breathe on me already."
Rodney sighed, squared his shoulders, and walked over to John. He leaned forward just a bit and huffed out a small breath.
"Yeah, I don't think that would have worked even for Lucius," John told him. "Try again."
Rodney grimaced, stepped closer, took hold of John's shoulders, puckered his lips, and blew out a long, thin stream of breath. John closed his eyes and breathed in, feeling Rodney's hands on his shoulders, Rodney's breath on his face. His cock twitched again, and he concentrated on keeping his wayward dick under control. Now was definitely not the time to freak McKay out with the big gay reveal. He was already on the verge of a panic attack as it was.
Rodney breathed on him again, and John began to feel kind of giddy. A feeling a joy and well-being spread through his body and he opened his eyes and grinned at Rodney.
"Hey, buddy," he said happily. He couldn't understand why Rodney looked less than happy when he stepped back away from John.
"Hop on one leg," Rodney said.
John started hopping and laughed heartily. "Hey, this is fun. You should do it, Rodney."
"Uh, no. Okay, stop."
John stopped, still smiling and happy. Gee, Rodney was a great guy, and John loved him a lot. He worked so hard for Atlantis, but no one really appreciated him. Well, John appreciated him in all kinds of ways, and it was about time he showed him just how much he was appreciated. John stepped forward into Rodney's personal space.
"Can I do something for you, Rodney?" John asked eagerly. "I'll do anything you want. Anything at all." To prove his point, he leaned forward, lowered his head, and brushed a light kiss across Rodney's mouth. To his disappointment, Rodney jumped back as if he'd been stung.
"No," Rodney said with a squeak. Clearing his throat, he repeated, "No, really, I'm good. I really, really don't need you doing anything for me at all."
John pouted a bit and then looked around the messy room. An idea came to him.
"Hey, I could clean up your room." He turned to Rodney, happy that he'd found something to do for him since kissing seemed to be off the table. "You want me to clean up your room?"
Without waiting for an answer, he started picking up PowerBar wrappers and throwing them into the already overflowing trashcan. He'd just turned to the bed and begun to straighten it when Elizabeth's voice sounded in his ear.
"Colonel Sheppard?"
John sighed and let the blanket drop back onto the bed.
"Sheppard," he answered after clicking on his earpiece.
"Dr. Beckett and his team are ready to go to Lucius's planet."
"Okay, I'll gather my team. Sheppard out."
He turned to Rodney. "Sorry, buddy, but this is going to have to wait. Beckett's ready."
Rodney, who had been watching him with eyes wide and kind of spooked, nodded eagerly and said, "Yes, good. Let's go."
He was out of his quarters before John had even taken a step.
____________________
John turned to Rodney and slapped him lightly on the chest, "Hey, buddy," he said. "I'd better get back and clean your quarters before the next scout." Patting Rodney's shoulder, he turned and hurried off.
He had gotten the dirty clothes picked up and was working on straightening Rodney's bed when the door opened and Rodney walked in.
"Rodney," John exclaimed, happy to see him again. "When we get back from the next scout, I'll do your laundry, okay?"
"No, it's not okay," Rodney said irritably. John looked at him in surprised hurt, and Rodney closed his eyes and sighed. "Look, you need to report to Beckett."
John frowned. "Why?"
Rodney glared at him. "You know why. It's to get the antidote injection."
"They know?"
"Of course they know after you talked about cleaning my quarters in front of them," Rodney snapped.
"Oh," John said with an embarrassed grin. "Oops."
"Yes, oops. And now everyone thinks the worst of me. Which, by the way, is the story of my life."
There was a hint of bitterness in Rodney's voice that sent pain through John's heart. He wanted nothing more than to make Rodney happy again so he walked over to him and captured Rodney's face in his hands. "I'm sorry, Rodney," he said. "I'll make it up to you, I promise." He leaned down and took Rodney's mouth in a kiss.
Rodney tried to jerk away, but he was trapped between the wall and John's body and had nowhere to go. He reached up and grabbed both of John's forearms and pushed, but John just kept kissing him, brushing his lips over Rodney's lips, pressing hard and then soft, taking the lower lip between his teeth and nibbling, and when he licked around Rodney's lips and demanded entrance, Rodney moaned and opened to let him in.
John felt euphoria wash over him, and he deepened the kiss, tasting Rodney, rubbing against Rodney's tongue and then sucking it into his mouth. Rodney kissed back eagerly and lowered his hands from John's arms to his hips, pulling John against his body. John broke off the kiss with a hiss when his erection brushed against Rodney's own hard-on, and he slid a hand down Rodney's body to his bulge. He cupped Rodney and stroked lightly, and shivered when Rodney whimpered.
"John," Rodney gasped and bucked into John's hand.
John raised his head from Rodney's neck where he'd been sucking on the sweet skin, and whispered into Rodney's ear, "Let me make you happy, Rodney."
He heard Rodney gasp right before he found himself pushed halfway across the room.
"Rodney?" John said in surprise. He started to walk back to him, his cock aching with need.
"No," Rodney practically shouted and held out an arm, palm flat out like a traffic cop. His hand was shaking. "We are not going to do this. Get out, John. Go see Beckett."
"Rodney, I just want to-"
Rodney walked over to his door, and slapped his hand down on the control panel. "Get. Out."
John sighed, hurt and unhappy that he couldn't please Rodney, but Rodney had ordered him out, and John had no choice but to go. The door hissed closed as soon as he was out in the hall.
____________________
John walked out of Elizabeth's office and headed for the transporter. He'd explained how the 'controlled experiment' had been his idea and that Rodney had been against it from the start. He didn't think she totally believed him, but she'd agreed not to reprimand Rodney. Now he needed to go and try to make things right with Rodney. When the transporter doors opened onto the hallway that led to Rodney's quarters, John moved forward slowly, unsure what he was going to say to Rodney.
If he was going to be completely honest with himself, then he had to admit that he was still aching with unfulfilled desire for Rodney. It wasn't a new feeling for him, but he'd always been careful enough that Rodney never seemed to suspect how he felt. Now Rodney knew, and John was worried about how Rodney was going to handle it, how Rodney actually felt about the whole thing. Rodney had kissed John back, enthusiastically, in fact, but then he'd pushed John away.
So the question was, had Rodney pushed him away because he hadn't wanted to take advantage of John when he was under the influence of the herb? Or had he pushed him away because, despite responding to John's kisses and caress, he really had no interest in having sex with another man?
John reached Rodney's quarters, gathered his nerve, and tapped on the door. Several seconds passed with no response, and John knocked again. He was getting ready to knock a third time when the door opened and Rodney stood there looking warily at John.
"Hey," John said.
"Are you yourself again?" Rodney asked, his body blocking the entrance to his quarters.
"Yeah, Beckett gave me the serum, and I explained to him and Elizabeth that it was my idea to conduct the experiment. You're not in any trouble." Then John grinned and confessed, "Well, we're both in trouble, but not too much."
"Oh," Rodney said, looking a little surprised. "Thanks."
John smiled. "No problem."
They stood there and looked at each other for a while and then Rodney cleared his throat and said, "Well, I'm glad you're better now, but if you'll excuse me, I have important things I need to take care of." He stepped back and raised his hand to the door control.
John hastily stepped forward and said, "Rodney, wait." When Rodney stopped, John said, "Look, I think we need to talk about what happened."
"I..." Rodney said hesitantly.
"Rodney, come on. We need to talk about it."
John could almost see the gears turning in Rodney's head as he mentally debated whether this was a good idea or bad one, but at last he nodded his head once and stepped back allowing John entrance. John looked around the sparkling clean quarters and grinned mischievously at Rodney.
"Looks nice," he said.
Rodney flushed, and said defensively, "Yes, well, it was almost done, so I figured I might as well clean up the rest."
John smirked and said, "That's good, Rodney. Just don't expect me to come in here and help you clean every time you make a mess."
Rodney flushed again, and turned away. "I didn't ask you to clean it this time," he said stiffly.
John sighed and stepped forward catching Rodney by the shoulder. "Hey, I was just teasing," he said.
Rodney shook his head and moved out of John's reach before turning around again, his arms crossed defensively over his chest. "I know," he finally said, looking at a point about thirty degrees to the right of John's feet.
Okay, John thought. This was going to be awkward and uncomfortable and maybe it'd be best for both of them if he just forgot the whole thing, let Rodney pretend they hadn't kissed like they were five seconds away from full frontal nudity. Then Rodney looked up at him, and John knew that Rodney would never be able to just forget about what had happened.
He took one cautious step forward. "Rodney, about the other stuff," he said, and watched as Rodney's face first paled and then suffused with blood.
"It's quite all right, Sheppard," Rodney said stiffly, discomfort palpable. "I understand completely how out of control that herb makes someone. It's why I didn't want to use it on you in the first place."
John got a cold feeling in the pit of his stomach at Rodney's words.
"You understand... Rodney," John said stepping even closer to his friend. "Did that bastard make you-"
"No!" Rodney said, eyes wide and shocked. His arms dropped back to his sides. "No, I, um, I fetched him blue jello."
John felt relief course through his body, and one side of his mouth quirked into a small smile. "Blue jello?" he asked.
Rodney raised his chin and said, "Blue jello is delicious. Especially with whipped cream."
John grinned. "Yes, it is," he agreed, and relaxed a bit when Rodney smiled shyly back at him. But then John sobered again, because he really, really needed to know the answer to his next question.
"Did you want to, um, please him like that?"
Rodney swallowed nervously, and shook his head. "No, it never crossed my mind. I mean, if he'd brought it up, I probably would have gone along with it because I wouldn't have had a choice, but, um, no, I never thought to..."
And then the penny dropped. Rodney's eyes widened and he stared at John. "Oh," he said, sounding a little breathless.
John licked his suddenly dry lips and Rodney's gaze immediately dropped to John's mouth. He licked his own lips and John immediately got hard. With his heartbeat pounding a rhythm in his ears, he reached out and traced a line across Rodney's cheekbone with his thumb.
Rodney started at the touch, but when his gaze rose to meet John's, John saw that his eyes had darkened. John took a step closer, slid his hand around to the back of Rodney's head, whispered, "I still want to please you," and lowered his head to capture Rodney's mouth in a kiss.
He felt Rodney shudder, and then Rodney opened to him, hot and eager and just a little wild. His hands reached up and grasped John's upper arms, squeezing tightly before moving up to his shoulders and then around to his back, pulling him closer. John thrust his hips forward, and they both groaned when their hard cocks brushed against each other.
John reached down and cupped Rodney, rubbing through the loose cotton of his trousers. Rodney gasped and dug his fingers into John's shoulder blades, thrusting forward into John's hand.
"Rodney," John whispered as he trailed his lips over Rodney's neck, nipping at the tender skin, and then licking to soothe the sting. "Please."
Their mouths joined again, wet and dirty, tongues licking, mouths sucking. Rodney was bucking uncontrollably into John's hand, and John realized through the haze of lust that if he didn't get Rodney naked soon, he was going to come in his pants, and John wanted him naked and under him when he came.
He pushed Rodney backward until his legs hit the bed, and then John began to strip him. He tugged Rodney's shirt up and over his head, and then took a few minutes to lick a path down Rodney's chest to his nipples. He heard Rodney hiss in pleasure as he licked and nipped and sucked at the small, hard nubs, and then he sank to his knees, licking his way down Rodney's belly and running his tongue just under the waistband of Rodney's pants. He ran his hand up and across the hard shaft again and again while he licked at Rodney's belly, and then he lowered his head.
"John," Rodney moaned raggedly when John mouthed him through several layers of cotton. He rubbed with his mouth and his hand until Rodney grabbed his head and rocked into him, and then he pulled away. Rodney cried out in protest.
He reached down and untied Rodney's boots and pulled first them and then his socks off, and then he reached up and undid the button and zipper on Rodney's trousers. When the fly was open, he couldn't help but rub his mouth and face over Rodney's boxer-covered cock before he tugged both trousers and boxers off. When Rodney was naked, John sat back on his heels and looked at Rodney's cock, hard and flushed and in the perfect position for John to take into his mouth.
Unable to resist, John grabbed Rodney's cock, pulled it forward, and swallowed it down. Rodney gasped in pleasure, and John could feel Rodney's hips flex in reaction to John's sucking. John pulled back and licked up the length of Rodney's cock before sucking the head back into his mouth. Rodney groaned when John's tongue flicked across the nerves just under the head. "God, that feels so good," he moaned, and patted John's head in approval.
John was so hard now that he had to slip his hand between his thighs and rub at his own cock in an effort to relieve some of the pressure. He continued sucking until the pain of his confined cock became too much and he had to stand up and start stripping. Willing hands helped him push up his shirt, and then Rodney's hands were running up and down his chest and sides, fingernails scraping over nipples, and fingertips combing through the thick mat of hair on his chest.
Rodney pulled John's head down for another kiss, and then he pulled back and gasped, "John, are you sure? Are you sure this isn't the herb making you do this?"
John grabbed his head and kissed him until they both were dizzy from lack of oxygen. When he pulled back, he said, "It's not the herb, Rodney. It's me. It's what I want. Please, I want to fuck you."
Rodney pulled back, and John was afraid for a second that he was going to say no, but instead he said, "Finish getting undressed. I'll be right back."
John watched him as he hurried into his bathroom, his cock jumping at the sight of that beautiful ass, and then he quickly finished undressing and pulled back the covers on the freshly made bed. Rodney came back out of the bathroom with something in his hand, and John smiled when he saw it was a bottle of Astroglide. Rodney got into the bed beside John and handed him the bottle.
"Are you sure?" he asked again, sounding nervous.
John took Rodney's hand and placed it on his raging erection. "Does this feel like I'm sure?"
Rodney groaned and stroked the rock-hard cock. John hissed in pleasure and pushed Rodney onto his back, kissing him passionately and thrusting into Rodney's warm, tight fist. He kissed his way down Rodney's body until his head was even with Rodney's cock and then he took him in again, licking and sucking, fucking Rodney with his mouth.
Rodney's hands fisted into the bed sheets and his hips jerked in small thrusts. John sucked on his fingers and then slipped then between Rodney's thighs. He tugged and fondled Rodney's balls drawing more whimpers of pleasure from him, and then slipped a finger over his perineum and down until he circled Rodney's hole. Rodney jerked and spread his thighs, opening himself up to John. It was all the invitation John needed, and he slipped one finger in.
Rodney hissed and whispered, "Oh, yes. That's good,"
John moaned at the scent and sound and feel of Rodney, and he continued sucking and fingering him, loosening him up. When he could wait no longer, he pulled back and opened the bottle of lubricant. He slicked up his fingers, and then pushed Rodney's legs further apart, exposing the small brown hole. First one, and then two fingers slid in and he stroked, watching the pleasure wash over Rodney's face when he located Rodney's prostate. When he had Rodney open and ready for him, he slicked up his cock, positioned Rodney, and guided himself in.
John sucked air in through his teeth as the tip of his cock slipped inside Rodney. Rodney was tight, and he hissed in pain when John entered him, so John only pushed in a bit, just enough to breach the tight ring of muscle. The pleasure was so intense that he had to breathe deeply to keep from coming.
When he was under control again, he glanced up at Rodney and asked, "You okay? Is this okay?"
"Yes, it's fine now. Come on."
John grinned at Rodney's impatience and slid in a bit more, then back, and then in again, going deeper with each small thrust until he was balls deep in the tight passage. He had to stop then, once more close to losing control.
Rodney arched under him and moaned when John began to move in a slow, rhythmic motion that sent waves of pleasure coursing through his body. He almost lost it completely when Rodney reached down and began to jerk himself off.
"Fuck, Rodney," he gasped. "That's so hot."
John's thrusts picked up speed, and he began to pound into Rodney, barely holding it together. Rodney's fist pumped fiercely in counterpoint to John's thrusts, and then he stiffened under John and came. When Rodney's muscles clamped around him, John completely lost control and came in a hard rush.
He collapsed over Rodney, gasping for breath, and shaking from the aftereffects of his climax. When he finally caught his breath, he slipped from Rodney's body, and curled around him.
"You okay, Rodney?" he asked placing a kiss on his shoulder.
"Yes, fine," Rodney said. "I'm going to be stiff and sore tomorrow though."
"Mmm," John said, smiling and pressing another kiss to Rodney's shoulder. "I'll give you a massage."
Rodney snorted a laugh and said, "Just don't expect to fuck me again tomorrow." And then he stiffened a bit, and turned his head so he could see John. "Unless this was just a one-time thing? A leftover from that herb?"
John reached up and smacked Rodney on the back of the head.
"Ow," Rodney said, rubbing at the sting. "What was that for?"
"I told you, Rodney," John said in exasperation. "The herb has nothing to do with this. Well, except that it lowered my inhibitions enough to kiss you. I've wanted to sleep with you for a long time."
Rodney looked surprised and then smug. "Yes, of course. It's hard to resist my charm and genius."
John snorted and nipped sharply on Rodney's shoulder.
"Hey, marks! No marking the delicate skin," Rodney protested indigently.
John grinned and said, "You mean the manly delicate skin don't you?" and kissed the slightly red spot. At Rodney's huff of laughter, he sighed contentedly, and settled back around him.
"So, about tomorrow," John said casually. "You interested in topping?"
Rodney looked at him in surprise, and then he broke into one of those rare smiles that made his face light up and made John happy just to see. "Yes, Yes, I think I can say I'm very interested."
John smiled back and said, "Cool."
They settled again, and after a minute John said, "So what do you think about checking out the 'gate around P7S 152?"
"Hmmm, yes, that one's a possibility, and also the one at M3Z 522."
As Rodney began to expound on the prospects for their next scouting trip, John closed his eyes and let the words flow over him. It didn't eally matter which 'gate they decided to travel to next as long as he had Rodney beside him. And then after they returned, they'd come here and make each other happy under the influence of nothing more than their own desire.
The End
Author: Sandy
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Pairing: John/Rodney, First Time
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: ~4,700
Spoilers: Season 2.4, Duet, Season 3.3, Irresistible
Disclaimer: As much as I would love to own John & Rodney, alas I do not. I only make them have sex.
Warnings: None
Summary: John and Rodney decide to conduct a 'controlled experiment'.
A/N: Many thanks to seperis for coming up with the plot bunny that this fic is based on, and for allowing me to run with it.
One piece of dialogue and interaction is taken directly from Irresistible.
I'm also using this for the smut_69 community Prompt #29, Submissive, even though it may be stretching it a little to actually fit. But hey, my D/s creds are pretty much non-existent.
My John/Rodney Table
____________________
John trotted after Rodney and caught up with him outside his quarters.
"Rodney," he called out, and was surprised when Rodney flinched before turning around to face him. Rodney's chin went up in that defensive manner he had, and John frowned.
"Sheppard," Rodney said. "Something I can do for you?"
"I just wanted to make sure you were okay," John said and reached up and squeezed Rodney's arm. Rodney flinched again and pulled back away from his touch.
"Yes, yes, I'm fine. Thank you for asking." His eyes looked everywhere but at John.
John looked at him doubtfully. "Are you sure? You're still acting kind of weird."
Rodney closed his eyes, swallowed, and then opened his eyes again, this time looking at John.
"It's just..." He licked his lips. "Look, I know you were depending on me to help you find a solution, and I tried to stay away from him, but-"
"Hey," John said, interrupting him. "It wasn't your fault, Rodney. Hell, if Ronon held me against a wall, I doubt I would have been able to get free either. He didn't hurt you, did he?"
"No, of course not," Rodney said, but his eyes had taken on that suspiciously glassy look they got when he was experiencing a great deal of inner turmoil. "I wasn't hurt, but when I think of what could have happened to you..."
"Well, I wasn't hurt either," John said soothingly.
"But you could have been," Rodney said brokenly. "For god's sake, Sheppard. Ronon shot you!"
John shrugged and tried to lighten the mood. "He stunned me. It hurt a little, but I'm okay."
Rodney stared at him with an incredulous expression on his face. "Don't you get it? We would have done anything Lucius wanted. We would have, would have..."
John's eyes widened when Rodney choked on his words.
"Hey, buddy," John said rubbing Rodney's arm lightly. "You know you wouldn't have done anything like what you're thinking."
Rodney jerked back from him. "You don't understand! I had no will of my own. None. It was worse than when Cadman was in my head and taking over control of my body, because it was only me, and I didn't even care. Do you know what my only concern was when I saw you lying on the ground? That we'd have to carry you back to the puddle jumper. That was it. That was my big concern. You have absolutely no idea what it was like being under that herb's influence."
John was a little taken aback by just how distressed Rodney was over what had happened. He was right though; John didn't understand exactly what the others had gone through, and perhaps he should. He came to a decision.
"Then maybe I should find out."
"What?"
John reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out one of the vials that he'd gotten from Lucius's wives.
"My cold's almost gone," he said holding out the vial. "Drink a bit of this and then breathe on me."
Rodney stepped back away from the vial as if it were a venomous snake. "Are you nuts?" he exclaimed. "I'm not using that on you. Get rid of it."
John sighed. "You said I had no idea what it was like, and you're right. Just drink it, breathe on me, and then I'll understand what you went though."
Rodney crossed his arms over his chest and lifted his chin. "No."
"Dammit, McKay," John said getting ready to argue his case.
"Why do you want to do this?" Rodney asked, his arms flailing about. "Do you have a secret desire to be someone's slave? Believe me, it's not as much fun as it looks in porn."
"What? No," John said though his cock twitched just a little at the suggestion. "I'm just...curious."
"Curious," Rodney said flatly.
"Yeah. I really want to understand what everyone went through. Look, it'll be a controlled experiment."
"And when Elizabeth finds out about this 'controlled experiment'?" Rodney asked sarcastically.
"She doesn't need to find out," John said cajolingly. "No one else even needs to know." Rodney still looked stubbornly resistant so John brought out the big guns. "I trust you, Rodney."
Rodney folded like a house of cards.
"Fine," he sighed. He turned and slapped the panel to open the door to his quarters. "But if you insist on doing this, let's not do it in a public corridor, all right?"
John followed Rodney into his quarters and looked around in surprise.
"Housekeeper's week off, McKay?" he asked dryly. Soiled clothes were thrown about haphazardly, PowerBar wrappers and Ancient doodads covered every surface, and the bed was unmade with the blanket and top sheet half hanging off the side and lying puddled on the floor.
"Yes, well, I've been very busy saving both the Pegasus and the Milky Way Galaxies, so excuse me if my quarters fall below Good Housekeeping standards," McKay replied snappishly.
"Hey," John said holding up his hands in surrender. "I wasn't criticizing; just making a comment. They're your quarters. You can live like a slob if you want to."
He grinned when Rodney glared at him. Then Rodney's eyes dropped to the vial John was still holding and he sighed.
"Are you sure you want to do this? There's really no need. You can just take my word that you'll have no will of your own. All you'll want to do is please me, and do whatever I suggest. I could make you do any evil thing I wanted."
John closed his eyes as if pained. "Thanks a lot, McKay. Now you have me picturing you in a Catwoman costume, and believe me, it's not a pretty sight."
"Oh yes, Sheppard. Ha, ha. Very funny."
John grinned at his friend and then sobered. "Come on, Rodney. Let's do this," he said and held the vial out to Rodney. Rodney hesitated, and then with slumped shoulders took it from John.
"I'm going to be in so much trouble if Elizabeth finds out," he said before he uncorked it and took a small swallow. John had to grin at the grimace Rodney made when he tasted the elixir. Rodney recapped the bottle and set in down in one of the few clear spaces on his desk.
"I don't know how long it's going to take before it become effective," Rodney said not looking at John.
"Well, breathe on me and see if anything happens.
Rodney made a moue of displeasure and then said, "Maybe I should go gargle first."
John rolled his eyes, "Rodney," he said. "You don't have bad breath. Just breathe on me already."
Rodney sighed, squared his shoulders, and walked over to John. He leaned forward just a bit and huffed out a small breath.
"Yeah, I don't think that would have worked even for Lucius," John told him. "Try again."
Rodney grimaced, stepped closer, took hold of John's shoulders, puckered his lips, and blew out a long, thin stream of breath. John closed his eyes and breathed in, feeling Rodney's hands on his shoulders, Rodney's breath on his face. His cock twitched again, and he concentrated on keeping his wayward dick under control. Now was definitely not the time to freak McKay out with the big gay reveal. He was already on the verge of a panic attack as it was.
Rodney breathed on him again, and John began to feel kind of giddy. A feeling a joy and well-being spread through his body and he opened his eyes and grinned at Rodney.
"Hey, buddy," he said happily. He couldn't understand why Rodney looked less than happy when he stepped back away from John.
"Hop on one leg," Rodney said.
John started hopping and laughed heartily. "Hey, this is fun. You should do it, Rodney."
"Uh, no. Okay, stop."
John stopped, still smiling and happy. Gee, Rodney was a great guy, and John loved him a lot. He worked so hard for Atlantis, but no one really appreciated him. Well, John appreciated him in all kinds of ways, and it was about time he showed him just how much he was appreciated. John stepped forward into Rodney's personal space.
"Can I do something for you, Rodney?" John asked eagerly. "I'll do anything you want. Anything at all." To prove his point, he leaned forward, lowered his head, and brushed a light kiss across Rodney's mouth. To his disappointment, Rodney jumped back as if he'd been stung.
"No," Rodney said with a squeak. Clearing his throat, he repeated, "No, really, I'm good. I really, really don't need you doing anything for me at all."
John pouted a bit and then looked around the messy room. An idea came to him.
"Hey, I could clean up your room." He turned to Rodney, happy that he'd found something to do for him since kissing seemed to be off the table. "You want me to clean up your room?"
Without waiting for an answer, he started picking up PowerBar wrappers and throwing them into the already overflowing trashcan. He'd just turned to the bed and begun to straighten it when Elizabeth's voice sounded in his ear.
"Colonel Sheppard?"
John sighed and let the blanket drop back onto the bed.
"Sheppard," he answered after clicking on his earpiece.
"Dr. Beckett and his team are ready to go to Lucius's planet."
"Okay, I'll gather my team. Sheppard out."
He turned to Rodney. "Sorry, buddy, but this is going to have to wait. Beckett's ready."
Rodney, who had been watching him with eyes wide and kind of spooked, nodded eagerly and said, "Yes, good. Let's go."
He was out of his quarters before John had even taken a step.
____________________
John turned to Rodney and slapped him lightly on the chest, "Hey, buddy," he said. "I'd better get back and clean your quarters before the next scout." Patting Rodney's shoulder, he turned and hurried off.
He had gotten the dirty clothes picked up and was working on straightening Rodney's bed when the door opened and Rodney walked in.
"Rodney," John exclaimed, happy to see him again. "When we get back from the next scout, I'll do your laundry, okay?"
"No, it's not okay," Rodney said irritably. John looked at him in surprised hurt, and Rodney closed his eyes and sighed. "Look, you need to report to Beckett."
John frowned. "Why?"
Rodney glared at him. "You know why. It's to get the antidote injection."
"They know?"
"Of course they know after you talked about cleaning my quarters in front of them," Rodney snapped.
"Oh," John said with an embarrassed grin. "Oops."
"Yes, oops. And now everyone thinks the worst of me. Which, by the way, is the story of my life."
There was a hint of bitterness in Rodney's voice that sent pain through John's heart. He wanted nothing more than to make Rodney happy again so he walked over to him and captured Rodney's face in his hands. "I'm sorry, Rodney," he said. "I'll make it up to you, I promise." He leaned down and took Rodney's mouth in a kiss.
Rodney tried to jerk away, but he was trapped between the wall and John's body and had nowhere to go. He reached up and grabbed both of John's forearms and pushed, but John just kept kissing him, brushing his lips over Rodney's lips, pressing hard and then soft, taking the lower lip between his teeth and nibbling, and when he licked around Rodney's lips and demanded entrance, Rodney moaned and opened to let him in.
John felt euphoria wash over him, and he deepened the kiss, tasting Rodney, rubbing against Rodney's tongue and then sucking it into his mouth. Rodney kissed back eagerly and lowered his hands from John's arms to his hips, pulling John against his body. John broke off the kiss with a hiss when his erection brushed against Rodney's own hard-on, and he slid a hand down Rodney's body to his bulge. He cupped Rodney and stroked lightly, and shivered when Rodney whimpered.
"John," Rodney gasped and bucked into John's hand.
John raised his head from Rodney's neck where he'd been sucking on the sweet skin, and whispered into Rodney's ear, "Let me make you happy, Rodney."
He heard Rodney gasp right before he found himself pushed halfway across the room.
"Rodney?" John said in surprise. He started to walk back to him, his cock aching with need.
"No," Rodney practically shouted and held out an arm, palm flat out like a traffic cop. His hand was shaking. "We are not going to do this. Get out, John. Go see Beckett."
"Rodney, I just want to-"
Rodney walked over to his door, and slapped his hand down on the control panel. "Get. Out."
John sighed, hurt and unhappy that he couldn't please Rodney, but Rodney had ordered him out, and John had no choice but to go. The door hissed closed as soon as he was out in the hall.
____________________
John walked out of Elizabeth's office and headed for the transporter. He'd explained how the 'controlled experiment' had been his idea and that Rodney had been against it from the start. He didn't think she totally believed him, but she'd agreed not to reprimand Rodney. Now he needed to go and try to make things right with Rodney. When the transporter doors opened onto the hallway that led to Rodney's quarters, John moved forward slowly, unsure what he was going to say to Rodney.
If he was going to be completely honest with himself, then he had to admit that he was still aching with unfulfilled desire for Rodney. It wasn't a new feeling for him, but he'd always been careful enough that Rodney never seemed to suspect how he felt. Now Rodney knew, and John was worried about how Rodney was going to handle it, how Rodney actually felt about the whole thing. Rodney had kissed John back, enthusiastically, in fact, but then he'd pushed John away.
So the question was, had Rodney pushed him away because he hadn't wanted to take advantage of John when he was under the influence of the herb? Or had he pushed him away because, despite responding to John's kisses and caress, he really had no interest in having sex with another man?
John reached Rodney's quarters, gathered his nerve, and tapped on the door. Several seconds passed with no response, and John knocked again. He was getting ready to knock a third time when the door opened and Rodney stood there looking warily at John.
"Hey," John said.
"Are you yourself again?" Rodney asked, his body blocking the entrance to his quarters.
"Yeah, Beckett gave me the serum, and I explained to him and Elizabeth that it was my idea to conduct the experiment. You're not in any trouble." Then John grinned and confessed, "Well, we're both in trouble, but not too much."
"Oh," Rodney said, looking a little surprised. "Thanks."
John smiled. "No problem."
They stood there and looked at each other for a while and then Rodney cleared his throat and said, "Well, I'm glad you're better now, but if you'll excuse me, I have important things I need to take care of." He stepped back and raised his hand to the door control.
John hastily stepped forward and said, "Rodney, wait." When Rodney stopped, John said, "Look, I think we need to talk about what happened."
"I..." Rodney said hesitantly.
"Rodney, come on. We need to talk about it."
John could almost see the gears turning in Rodney's head as he mentally debated whether this was a good idea or bad one, but at last he nodded his head once and stepped back allowing John entrance. John looked around the sparkling clean quarters and grinned mischievously at Rodney.
"Looks nice," he said.
Rodney flushed, and said defensively, "Yes, well, it was almost done, so I figured I might as well clean up the rest."
John smirked and said, "That's good, Rodney. Just don't expect me to come in here and help you clean every time you make a mess."
Rodney flushed again, and turned away. "I didn't ask you to clean it this time," he said stiffly.
John sighed and stepped forward catching Rodney by the shoulder. "Hey, I was just teasing," he said.
Rodney shook his head and moved out of John's reach before turning around again, his arms crossed defensively over his chest. "I know," he finally said, looking at a point about thirty degrees to the right of John's feet.
Okay, John thought. This was going to be awkward and uncomfortable and maybe it'd be best for both of them if he just forgot the whole thing, let Rodney pretend they hadn't kissed like they were five seconds away from full frontal nudity. Then Rodney looked up at him, and John knew that Rodney would never be able to just forget about what had happened.
He took one cautious step forward. "Rodney, about the other stuff," he said, and watched as Rodney's face first paled and then suffused with blood.
"It's quite all right, Sheppard," Rodney said stiffly, discomfort palpable. "I understand completely how out of control that herb makes someone. It's why I didn't want to use it on you in the first place."
John got a cold feeling in the pit of his stomach at Rodney's words.
"You understand... Rodney," John said stepping even closer to his friend. "Did that bastard make you-"
"No!" Rodney said, eyes wide and shocked. His arms dropped back to his sides. "No, I, um, I fetched him blue jello."
John felt relief course through his body, and one side of his mouth quirked into a small smile. "Blue jello?" he asked.
Rodney raised his chin and said, "Blue jello is delicious. Especially with whipped cream."
John grinned. "Yes, it is," he agreed, and relaxed a bit when Rodney smiled shyly back at him. But then John sobered again, because he really, really needed to know the answer to his next question.
"Did you want to, um, please him like that?"
Rodney swallowed nervously, and shook his head. "No, it never crossed my mind. I mean, if he'd brought it up, I probably would have gone along with it because I wouldn't have had a choice, but, um, no, I never thought to..."
And then the penny dropped. Rodney's eyes widened and he stared at John. "Oh," he said, sounding a little breathless.
John licked his suddenly dry lips and Rodney's gaze immediately dropped to John's mouth. He licked his own lips and John immediately got hard. With his heartbeat pounding a rhythm in his ears, he reached out and traced a line across Rodney's cheekbone with his thumb.
Rodney started at the touch, but when his gaze rose to meet John's, John saw that his eyes had darkened. John took a step closer, slid his hand around to the back of Rodney's head, whispered, "I still want to please you," and lowered his head to capture Rodney's mouth in a kiss.
He felt Rodney shudder, and then Rodney opened to him, hot and eager and just a little wild. His hands reached up and grasped John's upper arms, squeezing tightly before moving up to his shoulders and then around to his back, pulling him closer. John thrust his hips forward, and they both groaned when their hard cocks brushed against each other.
John reached down and cupped Rodney, rubbing through the loose cotton of his trousers. Rodney gasped and dug his fingers into John's shoulder blades, thrusting forward into John's hand.
"Rodney," John whispered as he trailed his lips over Rodney's neck, nipping at the tender skin, and then licking to soothe the sting. "Please."
Their mouths joined again, wet and dirty, tongues licking, mouths sucking. Rodney was bucking uncontrollably into John's hand, and John realized through the haze of lust that if he didn't get Rodney naked soon, he was going to come in his pants, and John wanted him naked and under him when he came.
He pushed Rodney backward until his legs hit the bed, and then John began to strip him. He tugged Rodney's shirt up and over his head, and then took a few minutes to lick a path down Rodney's chest to his nipples. He heard Rodney hiss in pleasure as he licked and nipped and sucked at the small, hard nubs, and then he sank to his knees, licking his way down Rodney's belly and running his tongue just under the waistband of Rodney's pants. He ran his hand up and across the hard shaft again and again while he licked at Rodney's belly, and then he lowered his head.
"John," Rodney moaned raggedly when John mouthed him through several layers of cotton. He rubbed with his mouth and his hand until Rodney grabbed his head and rocked into him, and then he pulled away. Rodney cried out in protest.
He reached down and untied Rodney's boots and pulled first them and then his socks off, and then he reached up and undid the button and zipper on Rodney's trousers. When the fly was open, he couldn't help but rub his mouth and face over Rodney's boxer-covered cock before he tugged both trousers and boxers off. When Rodney was naked, John sat back on his heels and looked at Rodney's cock, hard and flushed and in the perfect position for John to take into his mouth.
Unable to resist, John grabbed Rodney's cock, pulled it forward, and swallowed it down. Rodney gasped in pleasure, and John could feel Rodney's hips flex in reaction to John's sucking. John pulled back and licked up the length of Rodney's cock before sucking the head back into his mouth. Rodney groaned when John's tongue flicked across the nerves just under the head. "God, that feels so good," he moaned, and patted John's head in approval.
John was so hard now that he had to slip his hand between his thighs and rub at his own cock in an effort to relieve some of the pressure. He continued sucking until the pain of his confined cock became too much and he had to stand up and start stripping. Willing hands helped him push up his shirt, and then Rodney's hands were running up and down his chest and sides, fingernails scraping over nipples, and fingertips combing through the thick mat of hair on his chest.
Rodney pulled John's head down for another kiss, and then he pulled back and gasped, "John, are you sure? Are you sure this isn't the herb making you do this?"
John grabbed his head and kissed him until they both were dizzy from lack of oxygen. When he pulled back, he said, "It's not the herb, Rodney. It's me. It's what I want. Please, I want to fuck you."
Rodney pulled back, and John was afraid for a second that he was going to say no, but instead he said, "Finish getting undressed. I'll be right back."
John watched him as he hurried into his bathroom, his cock jumping at the sight of that beautiful ass, and then he quickly finished undressing and pulled back the covers on the freshly made bed. Rodney came back out of the bathroom with something in his hand, and John smiled when he saw it was a bottle of Astroglide. Rodney got into the bed beside John and handed him the bottle.
"Are you sure?" he asked again, sounding nervous.
John took Rodney's hand and placed it on his raging erection. "Does this feel like I'm sure?"
Rodney groaned and stroked the rock-hard cock. John hissed in pleasure and pushed Rodney onto his back, kissing him passionately and thrusting into Rodney's warm, tight fist. He kissed his way down Rodney's body until his head was even with Rodney's cock and then he took him in again, licking and sucking, fucking Rodney with his mouth.
Rodney's hands fisted into the bed sheets and his hips jerked in small thrusts. John sucked on his fingers and then slipped then between Rodney's thighs. He tugged and fondled Rodney's balls drawing more whimpers of pleasure from him, and then slipped a finger over his perineum and down until he circled Rodney's hole. Rodney jerked and spread his thighs, opening himself up to John. It was all the invitation John needed, and he slipped one finger in.
Rodney hissed and whispered, "Oh, yes. That's good,"
John moaned at the scent and sound and feel of Rodney, and he continued sucking and fingering him, loosening him up. When he could wait no longer, he pulled back and opened the bottle of lubricant. He slicked up his fingers, and then pushed Rodney's legs further apart, exposing the small brown hole. First one, and then two fingers slid in and he stroked, watching the pleasure wash over Rodney's face when he located Rodney's prostate. When he had Rodney open and ready for him, he slicked up his cock, positioned Rodney, and guided himself in.
John sucked air in through his teeth as the tip of his cock slipped inside Rodney. Rodney was tight, and he hissed in pain when John entered him, so John only pushed in a bit, just enough to breach the tight ring of muscle. The pleasure was so intense that he had to breathe deeply to keep from coming.
When he was under control again, he glanced up at Rodney and asked, "You okay? Is this okay?"
"Yes, it's fine now. Come on."
John grinned at Rodney's impatience and slid in a bit more, then back, and then in again, going deeper with each small thrust until he was balls deep in the tight passage. He had to stop then, once more close to losing control.
Rodney arched under him and moaned when John began to move in a slow, rhythmic motion that sent waves of pleasure coursing through his body. He almost lost it completely when Rodney reached down and began to jerk himself off.
"Fuck, Rodney," he gasped. "That's so hot."
John's thrusts picked up speed, and he began to pound into Rodney, barely holding it together. Rodney's fist pumped fiercely in counterpoint to John's thrusts, and then he stiffened under John and came. When Rodney's muscles clamped around him, John completely lost control and came in a hard rush.
He collapsed over Rodney, gasping for breath, and shaking from the aftereffects of his climax. When he finally caught his breath, he slipped from Rodney's body, and curled around him.
"You okay, Rodney?" he asked placing a kiss on his shoulder.
"Yes, fine," Rodney said. "I'm going to be stiff and sore tomorrow though."
"Mmm," John said, smiling and pressing another kiss to Rodney's shoulder. "I'll give you a massage."
Rodney snorted a laugh and said, "Just don't expect to fuck me again tomorrow." And then he stiffened a bit, and turned his head so he could see John. "Unless this was just a one-time thing? A leftover from that herb?"
John reached up and smacked Rodney on the back of the head.
"Ow," Rodney said, rubbing at the sting. "What was that for?"
"I told you, Rodney," John said in exasperation. "The herb has nothing to do with this. Well, except that it lowered my inhibitions enough to kiss you. I've wanted to sleep with you for a long time."
Rodney looked surprised and then smug. "Yes, of course. It's hard to resist my charm and genius."
John snorted and nipped sharply on Rodney's shoulder.
"Hey, marks! No marking the delicate skin," Rodney protested indigently.
John grinned and said, "You mean the manly delicate skin don't you?" and kissed the slightly red spot. At Rodney's huff of laughter, he sighed contentedly, and settled back around him.
"So, about tomorrow," John said casually. "You interested in topping?"
Rodney looked at him in surprise, and then he broke into one of those rare smiles that made his face light up and made John happy just to see. "Yes, Yes, I think I can say I'm very interested."
John smiled back and said, "Cool."
They settled again, and after a minute John said, "So what do you think about checking out the 'gate around P7S 152?"
"Hmmm, yes, that one's a possibility, and also the one at M3Z 522."
As Rodney began to expound on the prospects for their next scouting trip, John closed his eyes and let the words flow over him. It didn't eally matter which 'gate they decided to travel to next as long as he had Rodney beside him. And then after they returned, they'd come here and make each other happy under the influence of nothing more than their own desire.
The End