(no subject)
That does it. Having been a cashier/Front End Supervisor once again for a few months, I need to rant my ass off. Which is probably a good thing. First off is a list of shit that happens entirely too often that really shouldn't--things to watch out for while you're in a shop.
1. So you're ready to check out--if the registers there have lights/service signs, and there's only one in service, go to it. No cashier? S/he will be there. See more than one cashier but only one light? For the love of god, to to the one with the light on. Now, I know this sounds simple. But one day when the other FES and I were working and I was at my counter doing something, she was in charge of ringing people up. Where did people go to check out? They came to me. My light wasn't on, and gee golly whiz--I was busy doing something and my counter was cluttered with my work. This happened for about 10 customers, until my fellow worker and I decided to change it up a bit. She had the glorious idea of having me turn my light on, and her's off. Didn't work though--customers still came to me.
2. While we're on the subject of checking out, I know that all of you have changed your minds on items. You get to the checkout and you realize, "no, I guess I don't really need this..." Or maybe you're still browsing and change your mind on an item, and don't want to put it back from whence it came. What should you do? Should you craftily shove it somewhere and hope that no one finds it? You should stash it on a shelf? Once at the register should you plop it down on one of the baskets of shit no one ever buys that's right at the counter? The answer is "no no no no no no no." Please--be honest. Tell the cashier or sales associate that you don't want the damn thing so s/he can put it where it belongs (we have bins for that, you know) instead of somewhere we won't find it until 5 minutes before closing time or in three months after the item's original location has moved or isn't even being sold.
3. Sales prices. At Michaels we have sale madness allllll the time. To let customers know this, we have a handy-dandy flyer that comes in the Sunday's newspaper. In addition to that, we even have the sales marked with wonderful signs all throughout the store. So you go in--you see that your Deluxe Scrapbook-o-matic or 1-pound skein of yarn is on sale for X% or $X. Easy. The signs even have things on them saying what precise item is on sale, the price or percentage off, and gasp! the dates of the sale. Sounds brainless. If you can read you can get something on sale. HOWEVER--don't go to the checkout and get all huffy because you wanted to use your coupon on an item that's on sale and then claim "but how am I supposed to know that?" Bullshit. Signs. Plus, if you have the damn coupon, that means you have the damn flyer which means that you can see if the damn item's on sale or not. Today was 50% off coupon day, and I have never had so many damn customers who got their panties all in a bunch because they were "decieved" (to use one of their words) because they got to the register and the item was on sale, thus preventing them from using their blessed coupon. And if there's a sale going on AND a coupon? Don't even think for one second that we'll let you have the item regular priced with the coupon, or even (the rare) coupon WITH the sale price. No fucking way. And it's sad that I have to repeat that to customers day and and day out.
4. Don't fuck with people who handle your money and merchendise. I'll be honest--if you're being a total dick about something and you ask for a coupon (or say that you forgot it) there is a 1000% chance that I'll tell you to fuck yourself, in so many words (basically, "oh, sorry, but we need your coupon--we don't have any in the store."). Coincidentally, if you're sweet as pie and polite I'll be happy to offer a coupon. It's that easy--don't be bitches to cashiers.
5. Absolutely, under NO circumstances find yourself in the situation that you are checking out and realize that you forgot something. If this happens, finish with the transaction and look for whatever you forgot when you're done. NEVER leave a cashier hanging, because it's rude to the next customer who gets in line, and it's a pain in the ass for the cashier. Today my favorite customer came in--now, she and I have a bit of a history. We hate each other's guts. She's involved with some non-profit after-school program so she's always coming in for stuff--several times a week, usually. Well today after she had a return taken care of she looked around and came back up ready to check out. I start her transaction--a ton of little stuff. She has the Almighty 50%-Off Coupon and wants to use it on a paint set. Turns out that paint sets were *all* on sale, and I told her so. So she got all huffy and went to "grab something real quick." So I wait. And I wait. Meanwhile, another customer comes up, so I void the entire transaction to take care of new customer. She then came up (the timing was tragic). And she has her new item on which to use the coupon. It's another paint set. "Ma'am, this set's on sale too--they're all on sale." She gets angry, and says "lemme go get something else" and starts to walk away when I call her pay to pay for her shit 'cos I am NOT even scanning 15 mini stamps and 21 wood pumpkin cutouts again. Of course she got all angry and I had to explain to her that the people in line behind her had been very patient, and that it would be extremely discourteous of us to let her stop the purchase again. She sighed and paid. Came back later with the correct item and used the damn coupon. I gave her a big smile--"Have a great evening, ma'am. See you later."
6. Don't assume that the store in question sells everything. People have asked me if we sell (keep in mind--this is a craft store) shoe laces, drapes, towels, plates, tablecloths, furniture, blankets, lighters (I see a theme here; and it's funny, because why would customers come to Michaels for that shit? Why not go literally NEXT DOOR to the Marshalls, or to the Bed Bath, and Beyond before it had moved?).
7. When paying, try your best to get as close to the total as you can. As in, if your total is $4.53, and I can see that you have $5, gimme the five insead of handing me a $20. Odds are that people have been doing that all day, and so after tons of people paying for very small purchases with twenties, the cashier is very likely to run out of ones or fives. Personally, I'm a total dick about it, I'll be honest. When someone's paid for a two-dollar purchase with a twenty, when I'm out of something I'll go to the change drawer and go through all four keys 'cos "gosh, I can never remember which key goes in here" and take my sweet fucking time getting my new stack of ones. Yeah, I know--it's unfair, I'm being a bitch, blah blah blah... But hey--you waste my time and I'll waste yours. And while I'm on the subject, cashiers aren't your fucking ATM. A woman came in the other day. Her purchase total was $1.01. She paid with a $100 bill. No joke. I almost wanted to smack her in the face 'cos I probably had enough in pennies in my apron to pay for it (people are always donating pennies--"here, keep the change!"--like they're doing you a big-ass favor by giving you their one cent).
Ugh. Okay--I needed that. Therapy is good. I think my problem is that shit at work pisses me off so much and I can't really do anything about it and I just need to get it out of my system every once in a while. Oi.
1. So you're ready to check out--if the registers there have lights/service signs, and there's only one in service, go to it. No cashier? S/he will be there. See more than one cashier but only one light? For the love of god, to to the one with the light on. Now, I know this sounds simple. But one day when the other FES and I were working and I was at my counter doing something, she was in charge of ringing people up. Where did people go to check out? They came to me. My light wasn't on, and gee golly whiz--I was busy doing something and my counter was cluttered with my work. This happened for about 10 customers, until my fellow worker and I decided to change it up a bit. She had the glorious idea of having me turn my light on, and her's off. Didn't work though--customers still came to me.
2. While we're on the subject of checking out, I know that all of you have changed your minds on items. You get to the checkout and you realize, "no, I guess I don't really need this..." Or maybe you're still browsing and change your mind on an item, and don't want to put it back from whence it came. What should you do? Should you craftily shove it somewhere and hope that no one finds it? You should stash it on a shelf? Once at the register should you plop it down on one of the baskets of shit no one ever buys that's right at the counter? The answer is "no no no no no no no." Please--be honest. Tell the cashier or sales associate that you don't want the damn thing so s/he can put it where it belongs (we have bins for that, you know) instead of somewhere we won't find it until 5 minutes before closing time or in three months after the item's original location has moved or isn't even being sold.
3. Sales prices. At Michaels we have sale madness allllll the time. To let customers know this, we have a handy-dandy flyer that comes in the Sunday's newspaper. In addition to that, we even have the sales marked with wonderful signs all throughout the store. So you go in--you see that your Deluxe Scrapbook-o-matic or 1-pound skein of yarn is on sale for X% or $X. Easy. The signs even have things on them saying what precise item is on sale, the price or percentage off, and gasp! the dates of the sale. Sounds brainless. If you can read you can get something on sale. HOWEVER--don't go to the checkout and get all huffy because you wanted to use your coupon on an item that's on sale and then claim "but how am I supposed to know that?" Bullshit. Signs. Plus, if you have the damn coupon, that means you have the damn flyer which means that you can see if the damn item's on sale or not. Today was 50% off coupon day, and I have never had so many damn customers who got their panties all in a bunch because they were "decieved" (to use one of their words) because they got to the register and the item was on sale, thus preventing them from using their blessed coupon. And if there's a sale going on AND a coupon? Don't even think for one second that we'll let you have the item regular priced with the coupon, or even (the rare) coupon WITH the sale price. No fucking way. And it's sad that I have to repeat that to customers day and and day out.
4. Don't fuck with people who handle your money and merchendise. I'll be honest--if you're being a total dick about something and you ask for a coupon (or say that you forgot it) there is a 1000% chance that I'll tell you to fuck yourself, in so many words (basically, "oh, sorry, but we need your coupon--we don't have any in the store."). Coincidentally, if you're sweet as pie and polite I'll be happy to offer a coupon. It's that easy--don't be bitches to cashiers.
5. Absolutely, under NO circumstances find yourself in the situation that you are checking out and realize that you forgot something. If this happens, finish with the transaction and look for whatever you forgot when you're done. NEVER leave a cashier hanging, because it's rude to the next customer who gets in line, and it's a pain in the ass for the cashier. Today my favorite customer came in--now, she and I have a bit of a history. We hate each other's guts. She's involved with some non-profit after-school program so she's always coming in for stuff--several times a week, usually. Well today after she had a return taken care of she looked around and came back up ready to check out. I start her transaction--a ton of little stuff. She has the Almighty 50%-Off Coupon and wants to use it on a paint set. Turns out that paint sets were *all* on sale, and I told her so. So she got all huffy and went to "grab something real quick." So I wait. And I wait. Meanwhile, another customer comes up, so I void the entire transaction to take care of new customer. She then came up (the timing was tragic). And she has her new item on which to use the coupon. It's another paint set. "Ma'am, this set's on sale too--they're all on sale." She gets angry, and says "lemme go get something else" and starts to walk away when I call her pay to pay for her shit 'cos I am NOT even scanning 15 mini stamps and 21 wood pumpkin cutouts again. Of course she got all angry and I had to explain to her that the people in line behind her had been very patient, and that it would be extremely discourteous of us to let her stop the purchase again. She sighed and paid. Came back later with the correct item and used the damn coupon. I gave her a big smile--"Have a great evening, ma'am. See you later."
6. Don't assume that the store in question sells everything. People have asked me if we sell (keep in mind--this is a craft store) shoe laces, drapes, towels, plates, tablecloths, furniture, blankets, lighters (I see a theme here; and it's funny, because why would customers come to Michaels for that shit? Why not go literally NEXT DOOR to the Marshalls, or to the Bed Bath, and Beyond before it had moved?).
7. When paying, try your best to get as close to the total as you can. As in, if your total is $4.53, and I can see that you have $5, gimme the five insead of handing me a $20. Odds are that people have been doing that all day, and so after tons of people paying for very small purchases with twenties, the cashier is very likely to run out of ones or fives. Personally, I'm a total dick about it, I'll be honest. When someone's paid for a two-dollar purchase with a twenty, when I'm out of something I'll go to the change drawer and go through all four keys 'cos "gosh, I can never remember which key goes in here" and take my sweet fucking time getting my new stack of ones. Yeah, I know--it's unfair, I'm being a bitch, blah blah blah... But hey--you waste my time and I'll waste yours. And while I'm on the subject, cashiers aren't your fucking ATM. A woman came in the other day. Her purchase total was $1.01. She paid with a $100 bill. No joke. I almost wanted to smack her in the face 'cos I probably had enough in pennies in my apron to pay for it (people are always donating pennies--"here, keep the change!"--like they're doing you a big-ass favor by giving you their one cent).
Ugh. Okay--I needed that. Therapy is good. I think my problem is that shit at work pisses me off so much and I can't really do anything about it and I just need to get it out of my system every once in a while. Oi.