stress overload....
Well, here I am yet again typing on my live joural to you fine people. But, I have nothing to say. I mean I could ramble on about how I find things to be very odd. because I have seen a lot of odd things lately that I don't yet understand, and don't dare to question. But I fear that I would bore you. I could then tell you about how small things anger me to such a great extent, but that could just scare you. So I guess all I have to say is I saw a picture today that kind of pissed me off, which it shouldn't have. I have also realized that certain relationships make me jelouse. i mean not sexual relationships, just relationships in general. I often look at some of the people I really care about and say "my god I wish I had that kind of relationship with that person." It makes me sad to know that the people I thought I was close too, I'm not really that close to at all. I mean I don't often share myself with my friends, as they don't with me. I mean, the people I am supposed to know the best and feel more comfortable with and truley understand, i don't. I love them, and always will. But in the end our relationships just aren'tt he way we thought they were. I mean you watch that person with someone else, someone they might be really close with and you just don't even compare. It happens to me all the time. I've kind of been feeling like shit lately. i mean I feel very alone, I don't know if that makes sense. It's not so much that I don't have anyone there for me, becase I do, it's more that inside myself I am lonely. People who I thought I would know forever have kind of left me. The people I thought I knew best I don't know at all. And this has all happened in this last year. I mean I know that hole thing about how peopel change in high school and all that, but this, this is different. I used to think so highly of these people, and now I can't remember why. So anyway, sorry for rambling. Hope everyone is having a nice day. peace.