(no subject)
I've become acquainted with decisions I'v never had to make before. Simplified, they can all be made by answering a single 'master question:' Do I break my silence on life and reach into it, grabbing what I can, whether it brings heaven or hell? Or do I maintain my reservation, keep quiet, and remain a simple observer, making pretentious commentary on what I will never know?
I think that I've already chosen the first, I just haven't executed it yet. I don't expect that there should be any turning back. I'll be leaving some kind of home forever. Once I leave, its not really home anymore. I'll be burning whatever innocence I have left to light the path, only to be plunged into darkness.
The suffering I have endured has really taught me. Something I have learned through Nizche(sp?) and Proust. Rather, something a friend told me Nizche said or wrote (I can't really bring myself to care enough to look into it) and something Steve Correll's character said about Proust in Little Miss Sunshine. The depression I have been through feels like something I have earned. Having been through it and survived it, I feel like I have gained, somehow. The taste of a strange intoxicating sweetness that only pain can bring.
I think that I've already chosen the first, I just haven't executed it yet. I don't expect that there should be any turning back. I'll be leaving some kind of home forever. Once I leave, its not really home anymore. I'll be burning whatever innocence I have left to light the path, only to be plunged into darkness.
The suffering I have endured has really taught me. Something I have learned through Nizche(sp?) and Proust. Rather, something a friend told me Nizche said or wrote (I can't really bring myself to care enough to look into it) and something Steve Correll's character said about Proust in Little Miss Sunshine. The depression I have been through feels like something I have earned. Having been through it and survived it, I feel like I have gained, somehow. The taste of a strange intoxicating sweetness that only pain can bring.