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Dec 28, 2009 23:07

AAAH! Ridiculous lengths of time have passed since I posted here.

I have a new Livejournal--one that i've been using mostly for comms in the past few months. I hope I make an attempt continue actively LJing. I have no idea if anyone actually still reads this, but if so, new me is: asianonymous . So much for being anonymous.

A lot of things have happened during my absence from LJ. My immune system crashed and burned; I must've seen 8 or 9 different doctors during the year.  In the spring, I suffered from a severe existential crisis during which I considered dropping out of college to pursue adventures, delusional interests.  wtf. I don't understand myself either.
(Maybe I wasn't delusional, just scared.)

Summer was a torpid, emotional mess (somehow the two adjectives work together) and resulted in me spontaneously spending most of my earnings on a flight to Chicago to save my sanity.

I've struggled so much to figure out where my life is headed and what I want to do with it. I still don't know. This past quarter has been so mentally exhausting. I've had to deal with the most ridiculous things with people, friends. I wish I could scream about the foolishness of it all, but recounting everything is more energy than it's worth. I'm happy with school and work, and I'm more in love than I ever have been before. I could be so, so content, but there are  things that nag at me constantly, that I wish I could post about. I don't know.

I'm so glad that 2009 is coming to a close, but I'm scared too. I wish I had just one extra week here in Utah to relax, think, and see old friends, but I fly out Sunday morning.
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