(no subject)

[southblvd]

At the library now -- I have wanted to come here for the solace of mindless-book-shelving for over a week now; now that I'm here, however, I'm having medication withdrawal in the form of short spells of disorientation. I'm coughing, too, and trying to keep up with the runny nose that I caught from mom while at home. My sleep schedule for the past few days has been overindulgent, to say the least: 2am-12pm on Sunday, napped again until three in the afternoon, and again from 7:00-11:30 last night, then 3am-1pm today. Chris is out of town until tomorrow. We saw It's a Wonderful Life together Saturday night at the Byrd; I want my hair cut like the eldest Bailey son; I also want to grow it out to pin it up like the youngest Bailey daughter. My indecisiveness is least active at the trivial level -- including matters of the hair -- and grows in its activity as the decisions increase in importance; I can't believe I ever get anything done. I have needed, and wanted, to clean my apartment for the past couple days but have given in to sleeping instead despite feeling fucked while awake due to the massive clutter abound between my four walls. I want Stewart to call and say "hey, I'm um... um, I'm back in Richmond" so we can go refill my prescription en route to Chesapeake to rescue Lindsay. I want to stop for vegan pizza on the way home and drink fuckloads of Dr. Pepper so this sleeping-as-a-cure-for-aimlessness will no longer be possible. I have stopped taking care of my body.

I was given fifty dollars in target gift cards for the holidays -- I want to go spend, but I need Lindsay home first. Report from the target site: L -- the cheapest surger is just short of two-hundred dollars; why the fuck do sewing machines need to come in pink?

I made out with two different people in my dreams last night -- one is fucking disgusting, the other just ridiculous. I miss Chris.