Fwd:FW:RE:RE:RE:FW:Fwd:FW:FWD
Ever since I opened up my hotmail account 8 years ago (holy shit, that long!?) it's been a recipient for sometimes important stuff, sometimes funny stuff, and sometimes boring stuff.
However, the majority of the "stuff" which I will from here on refer to as "shit" are Forwards.
I cannot start to explain how much I hate forwards, however I will try my best since I pledged to myself that this would someday be written and perhaps become the most popular Forward in the world.
I will begin by analyzing the type of person that sends Forwards, and there is more than one, because we all know that even though we might not be the Forward Sending Kind or FSK (ugh!) we have been tricked into propagating this maleveolent, vicious EVIL.
-The Continuous Forward Sender, is the one who never writes and the only thing in your mailbox coming from them is a ridiculous amount of bullshit that you start wondering why they are really your friends and to some extent why were you so stupid as to give them your email address. This person is in a circle of Forward Senders that think email is just another thing like a nintendo...it is there for them to have fun. They check it to laugh, and spread what they think is a cheery message from your friend, which with some luck will touch you deeply, make you think about your life, keep you grinning blah blah blah...it is all BULLSHIT.
-The Occasional Forward Sender: This one is still in a recoverable stage, they know that email is a tool for your work, but they like opening "the funny ones".
What's funny is that they never re-send the funny ones, they are tricked into opening the ones about how if you re-send it to 10 people the person you like is going to kiss you and if you just ignore it a curse of love-draught will afflict you, your pubes will spontaneously combust, your dog will be eaten by godzilla and every possible thing you might fear.
Open your fucking eyes people, the sole purpose of Forwards is for the pure pleasure of the basement nerd who wrote it to count how many people his creation reached.
You should hate FWD's. They don't have any scruples. They'll try and get you to resend them with whatever it takes. May it be by:
threatening you (you'll get syphillis if you don't resend this by the way),
by making you feel guilty: (why are you shamed of sendindg the word of god but not jokes"
and the funniest one, by making you look stupid: (if you send this to 25 people your email account will remain open, or microsoft will give you $80,000...
HOW CAN PEOPLE BELIEVE THIS BULLSHIT?
ahhhh fuck, no concentration...finish this later...or never...who cares?
p.s. send this to as many people as you can so they know how much you hate forwards and a global anti-forward campaign is initiated.
However, the majority of the "stuff" which I will from here on refer to as "shit" are Forwards.
I cannot start to explain how much I hate forwards, however I will try my best since I pledged to myself that this would someday be written and perhaps become the most popular Forward in the world.
I will begin by analyzing the type of person that sends Forwards, and there is more than one, because we all know that even though we might not be the Forward Sending Kind or FSK (ugh!) we have been tricked into propagating this maleveolent, vicious EVIL.
-The Continuous Forward Sender, is the one who never writes and the only thing in your mailbox coming from them is a ridiculous amount of bullshit that you start wondering why they are really your friends and to some extent why were you so stupid as to give them your email address. This person is in a circle of Forward Senders that think email is just another thing like a nintendo...it is there for them to have fun. They check it to laugh, and spread what they think is a cheery message from your friend, which with some luck will touch you deeply, make you think about your life, keep you grinning blah blah blah...it is all BULLSHIT.
-The Occasional Forward Sender: This one is still in a recoverable stage, they know that email is a tool for your work, but they like opening "the funny ones".
What's funny is that they never re-send the funny ones, they are tricked into opening the ones about how if you re-send it to 10 people the person you like is going to kiss you and if you just ignore it a curse of love-draught will afflict you, your pubes will spontaneously combust, your dog will be eaten by godzilla and every possible thing you might fear.
Open your fucking eyes people, the sole purpose of Forwards is for the pure pleasure of the basement nerd who wrote it to count how many people his creation reached.
You should hate FWD's. They don't have any scruples. They'll try and get you to resend them with whatever it takes. May it be by:
threatening you (you'll get syphillis if you don't resend this by the way),
by making you feel guilty: (why are you shamed of sendindg the word of god but not jokes"
and the funniest one, by making you look stupid: (if you send this to 25 people your email account will remain open, or microsoft will give you $80,000...
HOW CAN PEOPLE BELIEVE THIS BULLSHIT?
ahhhh fuck, no concentration...finish this later...or never...who cares?
p.s. send this to as many people as you can so they know how much you hate forwards and a global anti-forward campaign is initiated.