eh
I'm kind of mad right now..for different reasons.
Last night Andrew's doing this thing where "supposably" he can't trust me and blah blah blah. Accusations and twisted shit like that. I understand and all, but we aren't dating and I try to explain to him that what I do is my own business, even though I'm not with anyone. I am sensitive to his problem, I just don't know if I can't take much of that before I explode. I know I kissed William when I was drunk, but Andrew and I weren't dating..and I wasn't THAT drunk. I knew what I was doing to an extent and I wanted to do it...I knew that he made me feel really good inside right then, I didn't think of the consequences considering his feelings or that when the next day came I'd still be lock and chained to Andrew. I LOVE Andrew so much, but we're so differnt in so many ways that it's hard to be in love with him. He knows that I need someone who can give me more than what he has to offer as sad as that sounds, and I know he needs someone like that only offering in his ways. I wish there was a pill I could give him to make him understand that he will live with or without me. Speaking of, I wish there was a pill I could give myself to make me forget all the bad shit that's happened these past 4 almost 5 years of loving him. It's like people who ended up being together, like soulmates..that the gods played tricks on. We weren't really meant to be. But I've learned so much from my time with him that I would not take it back.
And I like this girl,named Katie,but she has a girlfriend..and her girlfriend is one of my friends. I could never do that.I never have and never would. But this girl is so amazingly adorable, her walk, down to the way she blinks. And I like this guy that I used to like and who used to like me, but I know he would never give me a chance now. I just wish I could get closer to him. This person shall remain anonymous.
And I'm not really mad about this, but just aggravated..I couldn't get the Amnesty flyer today so we have to wait one more day. It's okay, it's not like we are in such a short amount of time, it's just I was looking forward to it.
One of my wisdom teeth is starting to come through. Ouch.
Last night Andrew's doing this thing where "supposably" he can't trust me and blah blah blah. Accusations and twisted shit like that. I understand and all, but we aren't dating and I try to explain to him that what I do is my own business, even though I'm not with anyone. I am sensitive to his problem, I just don't know if I can't take much of that before I explode. I know I kissed William when I was drunk, but Andrew and I weren't dating..and I wasn't THAT drunk. I knew what I was doing to an extent and I wanted to do it...I knew that he made me feel really good inside right then, I didn't think of the consequences considering his feelings or that when the next day came I'd still be lock and chained to Andrew. I LOVE Andrew so much, but we're so differnt in so many ways that it's hard to be in love with him. He knows that I need someone who can give me more than what he has to offer as sad as that sounds, and I know he needs someone like that only offering in his ways. I wish there was a pill I could give him to make him understand that he will live with or without me. Speaking of, I wish there was a pill I could give myself to make me forget all the bad shit that's happened these past 4 almost 5 years of loving him. It's like people who ended up being together, like soulmates..that the gods played tricks on. We weren't really meant to be. But I've learned so much from my time with him that I would not take it back.
And I like this girl,named Katie,but she has a girlfriend..and her girlfriend is one of my friends. I could never do that.I never have and never would. But this girl is so amazingly adorable, her walk, down to the way she blinks. And I like this guy that I used to like and who used to like me, but I know he would never give me a chance now. I just wish I could get closer to him. This person shall remain anonymous.
And I'm not really mad about this, but just aggravated..I couldn't get the Amnesty flyer today so we have to wait one more day. It's okay, it's not like we are in such a short amount of time, it's just I was looking forward to it.
One of my wisdom teeth is starting to come through. Ouch.