Relationship Meme v. Who's Counting Anyway

[soundslikepi]

SO NO MORE SHALL AVIY DO GIANT RELATIONSHIP MEMES WITH HER SEVEN CHARACTERS FOR YOUR SEVEN CHARACTERS. BULLSHIT.

You may request essays for UP TO TWO relationships and I will do them, verily. I also reserve the right to ask you to essay back. And if you WANT MORE THAN TWO you have to essay back ANYWAY and then reapply |D

HIT ME. Ed, Kira, Luke,

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[soundslikepi]

OKAY LETS SEE IF I CAN DO THIS

So, as you might have noticed, when it comes to human emotions Kira acts on a weirdly sort of sociopathic level. He is very capable of feeling stuff like love, obviously, but he really only does in select situations. Beyond that? The reason he can figure things out that cuts down to the core is because he's observant but not empathic. And this is... 95.9% of what Katou gets.

The REASON Kira has put up with, helped out and abused Katou long enough to call him 'friend' is entirely because Katou never once found the self esteem to leave for his own good. Oh, there might have been a time when Katou fucked himself over pretty bad and ran away in which case Kira probably tracked him down, kicked his ass and fixed him up. But if Katou had ever gone "Hey I'm too good for this shit" Kira wouldn't have even blinked, much less made an effort to stop him. \o/ SO HE'S A LOUSY FRIEND REALLY.

But Katou is hilariously leechy in his own way and Kira is seriously incapable of forcing anyone out of his emotional bubble for good, additionally, it's not like he was ever doing any thing very inconvenient by keeping Katou around! His detachment meant he was never really putting up with too much Katou's shit, and doing things like dragging his OD ass to the hospital or giving Katou REALLY OBVIOUS ADVICE about his fucked up life? Well, that's mostly Kira's nature.

It's not really that Kira doesn't care at all, it's just that, being as he's Kira, he's pretty much incapable of admitting he cares at all |D

But he really did genuinely enjoy the time he had with Katou, and really was genuinely... sad, yeah, when Katou died. Though that was less a feeling of "I lost my friend" and more a disappointment of "So, he couldn't make it afterall".

Anyway THE POINT I'M TRYING TO GET TO HERE is that Kira and Katou both know all the cards, more or less, when they're dealing with each other. Kira is perfectly well aware Katou is obsessed with him and knows he's never going to return those feelings, he knows Katou clings to him because he needs someone to care about him in this lonely world and that Kira was the first person to do so.

But on the 'not really human' level, he understands but doesn't quite empathize. Kira is honestly not really capable of fully grasping just how much Setsuna and Katou love him. He realizes they like his company, want his approval, respect his strength, fear his anger and that he has enough of an effect on their lives that they would be sad to lose him, possibly lost. But... love? For him? Honestly truly? He doesn't get it coming from there any more than he could understand it from his father. And since Setsuna and Katou don't SHOVE IT DOWN HIS THROAT STUBBORNLY the way his dad did, in a lot of ways he never has and probably never will notice.

FOR EXAMPLE Kira probably never realized the reason Katou hated Setsuna for all those years was because Kira loved him. I'm sure he made a connection to the fact Katou doesn't enjoy it when KIRA EJECTS HIM THE MINUTE SETSUNA COMES KNOCKING and is bitter about it, but the full out jealousy? The... sort of ego destroying knowledge of "Kira likes him better"? Has never really settled in. The simplest way I can explain it is that Kira knows his opinion and attention matters, just not his affection. Probably because Kira is typically not even aware of his own affections much less willing to call them that.