Still Confused
So yeah, me and my friend had a "talk" last night and I'm just as confused or more about our relationship. Atleast I know how he feels that is exciting, but...I don't know...I just like to know exactly what's going on...
So this whole situation is odd for me anyway. All these feelings, that I've basically locked away for all these years so as to not waste my time with someone who wasn't right, have burst back on the scene. Wow...it's kind of scary. I realize how much I like him and how I'm really willing to be in a relationship. It's not the wow I'm overdue or hormones are taking over type thing either. He has things that I really think would really fill me out. Now that I think about it, none of the guys that I really liked before would I ever really consider being in a relationship with. I saw the last guy I thought was gorgeous today and since it wasn't "him" he didn't even seem cute anymore. I don't want to look at anyone else.
I called Rosemary after me and "my confusers" talk and she asked me this crazy question, but the even funnier thing was that I didn't have to think about the response.
Rose: So, what if someone else asked you out on a date, would you be able to go?
Me: I don't know, I guess so.
Rose: What do u mean you guess so..you were on the phone for 2 hours!
Me: I guess I could, but I don't want to. No one else even matter to me. I don't want to go on a date with anyone else.
Rose: So if Aaron (AKA scarf boy) came up to you right now...
Erica: No
That was a little shocking to me. I guess I just never thought about it. I guess now I didn't have to.
There's just no time...I know he's busy, I am too. I know he's gonna be all over everywhere doing everything, but I'll still be here. I'm willing to still be here. Every musician who goes on the road needs someone to come home to, right?
I love John...I do...not like in love because I'm not sure I know what that is yet, but I care about him like and more than I've ever cared about any other guy. Maybe that's because I've never really had a boyfriend (no 8th grade does not count in my head), but somehow I don't think so. Oh, I guess I said his name...oh well, it's not like people at school don't already think we're "dating" anyway. Whatever. Overwhelming
So this whole situation is odd for me anyway. All these feelings, that I've basically locked away for all these years so as to not waste my time with someone who wasn't right, have burst back on the scene. Wow...it's kind of scary. I realize how much I like him and how I'm really willing to be in a relationship. It's not the wow I'm overdue or hormones are taking over type thing either. He has things that I really think would really fill me out. Now that I think about it, none of the guys that I really liked before would I ever really consider being in a relationship with. I saw the last guy I thought was gorgeous today and since it wasn't "him" he didn't even seem cute anymore. I don't want to look at anyone else.
I called Rosemary after me and "my confusers" talk and she asked me this crazy question, but the even funnier thing was that I didn't have to think about the response.
Rose: So, what if someone else asked you out on a date, would you be able to go?
Me: I don't know, I guess so.
Rose: What do u mean you guess so..you were on the phone for 2 hours!
Me: I guess I could, but I don't want to. No one else even matter to me. I don't want to go on a date with anyone else.
Rose: So if Aaron (AKA scarf boy) came up to you right now...
Erica: No
That was a little shocking to me. I guess I just never thought about it. I guess now I didn't have to.
There's just no time...I know he's busy, I am too. I know he's gonna be all over everywhere doing everything, but I'll still be here. I'm willing to still be here. Every musician who goes on the road needs someone to come home to, right?
I love John...I do...not like in love because I'm not sure I know what that is yet, but I care about him like and more than I've ever cared about any other guy. Maybe that's because I've never really had a boyfriend (no 8th grade does not count in my head), but somehow I don't think so. Oh, I guess I said his name...oh well, it's not like people at school don't already think we're "dating" anyway. Whatever. Overwhelming