Always get a number
So I'm staying at a resort, and I've just had the best interaction with a group of girls vacationing here as well. This is a new for me, as I'm often quite shy when traveling and rarely make that first step.... the whole situation though worked out wonderfully, until I just got home and realized something... the business card that I was given by the one I was most interested in, is no longer in my pockets.
So, I was watching the sunset at a bar/restaurant by myself and notice 3 girls at a table within earshot. I order my drink and appetizer and wait for the service to get to me, thinking to myself how I'm going to break into the set. My dad, before leaving the resort, had given me a great pick-up line for traveling, and it worked well. It's simple... "Are you waiting for anyone?" and he says to just wait for the response. I followed a little unconfidently by asking if I could join them, but I could see how their initial invite could come on its own.
So I sat down with my drink and had left my appetizer behind. Good girl waitress noticed after 5 minutes and grabbed it and brought it over for me. All I really did was ask them questions about their trip and other trips they'd been on. They were on a girl's trip and staying one last night before flying out the next afternoon.
One of the girls lived on another island (I'm staying on Hawaii), and the other 2 were from Chicago, but all with Hispanic roots, and me coming from Miami, got to identify with them on those similarities as well as other travel stories.
At times, I suppose questions I posed could have been used as opportunities for them to qualify themselves, like asking where else they've gone, what their favorite place was, different ideas for what to do while I'm here, and really just gave them plenty of opportunities to talk about their passions. That made the conversation really easy for me, because all I did was listen, respond if they asked something, and then re-engage with something that had gotten them talking in the first place. And being with a group of 3 made transitions really easy because they would take the reigns themselves and make conversation and I could just get to know them.
So the waitress came around and we all got another round, and in conversation, the Hawaii girl gave me her card as she's in the agriculture industry on Kauai, and I told her about my parents' land here. Aside from pick-up, I was genuinely interested in this girl because she could be someone really cool to get knowledge from for my parents' land.
The night runs out, the bar is closing, and they offer to give me a ride back to my room, entirely on the other side of the resort, but we keep conversation going, and they wish me well on the rest of my travels. I check with one of them that they're gonna be laying by the lagoon tomorrow, so I think to myself about hitting that up in the morning/afternoon to maybe reconnect, and I would contact the business card girl the next day and arrange a meetup to hang out before they go.
Alas, I get back to my room, empty my pockets, and not a business card to be found. I must have forgotten it on the table in front of me, and now it's lost to the universe.
I suppose this is really enforced outcome independence, because even with having a great time, I have no solid way to get back in contact. I could have easily gotten all 3 of their numbers, I think, because I did have a good conversation with them all and they seemed to enjoy themselves in my company, and even with going back to Chicago, they could have been cool people to keep in touch with.
But now, my hard connection is lost. But it really goes to show me what is possible. There will be other cool people to talk to while I'm here, and each step further out of my social comfort zone promises good things if tonight is any preview. either way, i'm staying in paradise, so nothing can keep me down. very much looking forward to tomorrow now though to parlay this confidence into a new day, and see where the next adventures take me.
So, I was watching the sunset at a bar/restaurant by myself and notice 3 girls at a table within earshot. I order my drink and appetizer and wait for the service to get to me, thinking to myself how I'm going to break into the set. My dad, before leaving the resort, had given me a great pick-up line for traveling, and it worked well. It's simple... "Are you waiting for anyone?" and he says to just wait for the response. I followed a little unconfidently by asking if I could join them, but I could see how their initial invite could come on its own.
So I sat down with my drink and had left my appetizer behind. Good girl waitress noticed after 5 minutes and grabbed it and brought it over for me. All I really did was ask them questions about their trip and other trips they'd been on. They were on a girl's trip and staying one last night before flying out the next afternoon.
One of the girls lived on another island (I'm staying on Hawaii), and the other 2 were from Chicago, but all with Hispanic roots, and me coming from Miami, got to identify with them on those similarities as well as other travel stories.
At times, I suppose questions I posed could have been used as opportunities for them to qualify themselves, like asking where else they've gone, what their favorite place was, different ideas for what to do while I'm here, and really just gave them plenty of opportunities to talk about their passions. That made the conversation really easy for me, because all I did was listen, respond if they asked something, and then re-engage with something that had gotten them talking in the first place. And being with a group of 3 made transitions really easy because they would take the reigns themselves and make conversation and I could just get to know them.
So the waitress came around and we all got another round, and in conversation, the Hawaii girl gave me her card as she's in the agriculture industry on Kauai, and I told her about my parents' land here. Aside from pick-up, I was genuinely interested in this girl because she could be someone really cool to get knowledge from for my parents' land.
The night runs out, the bar is closing, and they offer to give me a ride back to my room, entirely on the other side of the resort, but we keep conversation going, and they wish me well on the rest of my travels. I check with one of them that they're gonna be laying by the lagoon tomorrow, so I think to myself about hitting that up in the morning/afternoon to maybe reconnect, and I would contact the business card girl the next day and arrange a meetup to hang out before they go.
Alas, I get back to my room, empty my pockets, and not a business card to be found. I must have forgotten it on the table in front of me, and now it's lost to the universe.
I suppose this is really enforced outcome independence, because even with having a great time, I have no solid way to get back in contact. I could have easily gotten all 3 of their numbers, I think, because I did have a good conversation with them all and they seemed to enjoy themselves in my company, and even with going back to Chicago, they could have been cool people to keep in touch with.
But now, my hard connection is lost. But it really goes to show me what is possible. There will be other cool people to talk to while I'm here, and each step further out of my social comfort zone promises good things if tonight is any preview. either way, i'm staying in paradise, so nothing can keep me down. very much looking forward to tomorrow now though to parlay this confidence into a new day, and see where the next adventures take me.