(no subject)
I'm overflowing with ambition
but I've gotta keep in mind
the bottom line...
is the dollar sign.
...and that was intended to be the entirety of my post...
but nah.. i'll go on..
today i went back in time to my past recollections of 4 years ago.
back to when i was living with benadict and brian in the village, to when i watched a portion of the results of the '04 election come through with courtney.
and i went beyond just those posts in both directions, and for the first time in a few years, i went backwards beyond that, into the time where i was at UNF, making my decision to leave it, and then read forward through my process, and really realized that i did have no regrets at the time over what my decision was, and that what i made up my mind to do then really was the best for me overall.
i did develop a warped perspective over the years because of the significance of that time of my life, but in retrospect, among many other factors, what happened then really does not mean what i have made it to mean over the past 4 years. i glorified it beyond it's value. and i have robbed myself in the process in a way.
but, of course, there are no regrets.
i fully intend to go to jax for brian's show at unf on the 14th.
i'm forever grateful, appreciative, and supportive of my past friends from the jax area, including, of course, anne-marie, amber (both), brian, ben, leslie, jake, courtney, meagan, tyler, christie, brittany, jessie, alex, boca, mongoose matt, katie, andrea (who i just heard via facebook had a baby!), bryan, mike, all the disc players, and even a select few of the professors, including farber, for making those 2 years count to the most they could.
at times i regret not staying, but then i realize that i got out at the perfect time for myself personally. i needed to get out then to make those years matter as much to me as they did... if i had stayed, the significance would have faded like it seemed to to the rest of the group after i had left.
the friendships dissolved pretty fast, it seemed, after i was gone, so i was lucky to be a part of it when it was still pretty cohesive.
i'm just glad that i feel, in my heart of hearts, that if i ever wanted to reconnect with any of the people above, i could be in the familiar fold in a beat of the heart, and that it would really be comfortable.
LJ will forever be my 'UNF' journal.. the quantity of posts in those years, i'm sure, outnumbers, and out-qualifies all my posts in the years since then, and the significances of those posts in those years has most likely trumped many recent posts i've made, and i respect that.
but with this election, there is something special, moving something besides just this country.
lots of things are new.
and i look forward to them.
i've seen the way my past has changed according to the present, and i am prepared to accept the changes whole-heartedly and take it on as well as i know i can.
case in point...
lol
i'm still getting drunk on campus, running around at 5am, getting in trouble for being too loud, sneaking alcohol out of the dorms, and partying with people that aren't supposed to be partying.......
COLLEGE!
that's what i really miss. the fun of it all. and i still can have that.
yes!
but I've gotta keep in mind
the bottom line...
is the dollar sign.
...and that was intended to be the entirety of my post...
but nah.. i'll go on..
today i went back in time to my past recollections of 4 years ago.
back to when i was living with benadict and brian in the village, to when i watched a portion of the results of the '04 election come through with courtney.
and i went beyond just those posts in both directions, and for the first time in a few years, i went backwards beyond that, into the time where i was at UNF, making my decision to leave it, and then read forward through my process, and really realized that i did have no regrets at the time over what my decision was, and that what i made up my mind to do then really was the best for me overall.
i did develop a warped perspective over the years because of the significance of that time of my life, but in retrospect, among many other factors, what happened then really does not mean what i have made it to mean over the past 4 years. i glorified it beyond it's value. and i have robbed myself in the process in a way.
but, of course, there are no regrets.
i fully intend to go to jax for brian's show at unf on the 14th.
i'm forever grateful, appreciative, and supportive of my past friends from the jax area, including, of course, anne-marie, amber (both), brian, ben, leslie, jake, courtney, meagan, tyler, christie, brittany, jessie, alex, boca, mongoose matt, katie, andrea (who i just heard via facebook had a baby!), bryan, mike, all the disc players, and even a select few of the professors, including farber, for making those 2 years count to the most they could.
at times i regret not staying, but then i realize that i got out at the perfect time for myself personally. i needed to get out then to make those years matter as much to me as they did... if i had stayed, the significance would have faded like it seemed to to the rest of the group after i had left.
the friendships dissolved pretty fast, it seemed, after i was gone, so i was lucky to be a part of it when it was still pretty cohesive.
i'm just glad that i feel, in my heart of hearts, that if i ever wanted to reconnect with any of the people above, i could be in the familiar fold in a beat of the heart, and that it would really be comfortable.
LJ will forever be my 'UNF' journal.. the quantity of posts in those years, i'm sure, outnumbers, and out-qualifies all my posts in the years since then, and the significances of those posts in those years has most likely trumped many recent posts i've made, and i respect that.
but with this election, there is something special, moving something besides just this country.
lots of things are new.
and i look forward to them.
i've seen the way my past has changed according to the present, and i am prepared to accept the changes whole-heartedly and take it on as well as i know i can.
case in point...
lol
i'm still getting drunk on campus, running around at 5am, getting in trouble for being too loud, sneaking alcohol out of the dorms, and partying with people that aren't supposed to be partying.......
COLLEGE!
that's what i really miss. the fun of it all. and i still can have that.
yes!