(no subject)
It's been awhile. Let's see. What's been going on? Well, I graduated from college on May 31st. As I was walking to the lawn where the graduation was to be held, my eyes started welling up because I never thought I would finish. It took me all in all since high school about eight years but take into consideration about a year and a half of breaks added up during that time. The ceremony was fast and enjoyable. My parents and my aunt and uncle came to witness me walk onstage and shake the dean's hand. I couldn't wipe the silly smile off my face all day. It was truly an amazing feeling of accomplishment. And although I struggled a lot this semester, I managed to pull three B's and an A which in my opinion is pretty damn good considering how often I missed class and how most of my assignments were always late because I was just so over the whole thing. My parents threw me a brunch the next weekend which was very pleasant. I have a really great family. I'm lucky. Since then I have been trying to get my applications together for the teaching credential program. Yes, I am going back to school in order to be in school for the rest of my life but this time on the other end. I want to be an elementary school teacher. Today I finally completed the entire process of the application which consisted of filling out three different applications, a tb test, taking the CBEST test, getting my fingerprints scanned, getting all my transcripts from the different colleges I went to, getting letters of recommendation, and writing a statement of purpose on why I want to be a teacher as well as answering a few questions. It was a lot of work and a lot of money to get these things all in order but hopefully I will get into the program. It's called the ACT program and it's a two semester accelerated course designed for those who are able to spend all day in class and not work. I had a long talk with my parents and they agreed to support me from September until June or July so that I can get my teaching credential as soon as possible. Had I not chosen this program it would be another two years of school and I just don't think I am capable of that anymore. So I just sent in my completed application and now it's waiting time. I'm pretty confident about gettting in though. My grades are decent although I still don't know if I passed the CBEST. I'm sure I passed the reading and the writing but I really have no clue about the arithmetic since that is my worst subject and couldn't remember a thing about percents and all that. But you don't have to pass the test in order to get into the program. They just want proof that you took it. And I did. All four hours of it!! I'm just proud of myself for getting everything done. It was stressing me out because right after I finished school I had to deal with this and I wasn't in the mood! But it's done. Now I can just sit back and enjoy my summer. Well sort of. I'm still working for the stay at home mom with the two and a half year old who is getting a little bratty these days and I've been having to take many trips down to their beach apartment in Hermosa which is no little drive. But it is pretty down there. So that's my summer job then back to school in September if I get in and I better get in because if I don't, I really do not know what the hell I will do!!
Anyway, the other night I had a horrible nightmare. I was in a show and I couldn't figure out what song to sing. I finally chose You Oughta Know by Alannis.So I walk up on stage and i look out and everyone has left. But then they hear my name so they come back I guess expecting that I'm going to be really good. The music comes on, I open my mouth and I sound TERRIBLE. Horror is written on everyone's faces. I open my mouth again and I sound even worse. Then the music stops in the middle of the song and I keep singing but I still sound awful. I run offstage and start crying hysterically and the dream was so powerful that I woke up sobbing. I mean SOBBING. Tears were streaming down my face. So needless to say, it sort of wrecked my mood for the morning. Being that it was Tuesday I decided I would go to Karaoke to prove my dream wrong. So I go to Karaoke and the song comes on and I can't hear the music so the very first part of the song I am all off!!!! I was like "OH SHIT! MY DREAM IS COMING TRUE". Then the actual chords kicked in and I proceeded to sing the shit out of the song and everyone was cheering me on through the whole thing and it was an incredible feeling. Needless to say, I kicked my dreams ass. But, the strangest thing of all is, after I finished singing I sat down and started telling my friend about my dream and it clicked that subconsciously I had picked the same song I sang terribly in my dream and without even thinking about it I chose that as my first song to sing at Karaoke. Is that intense or what?? I kicked my dream's ASS! The mind is a powerful thing that's for sure.
Anyway, the other night I had a horrible nightmare. I was in a show and I couldn't figure out what song to sing. I finally chose You Oughta Know by Alannis.So I walk up on stage and i look out and everyone has left. But then they hear my name so they come back I guess expecting that I'm going to be really good. The music comes on, I open my mouth and I sound TERRIBLE. Horror is written on everyone's faces. I open my mouth again and I sound even worse. Then the music stops in the middle of the song and I keep singing but I still sound awful. I run offstage and start crying hysterically and the dream was so powerful that I woke up sobbing. I mean SOBBING. Tears were streaming down my face. So needless to say, it sort of wrecked my mood for the morning. Being that it was Tuesday I decided I would go to Karaoke to prove my dream wrong. So I go to Karaoke and the song comes on and I can't hear the music so the very first part of the song I am all off!!!! I was like "OH SHIT! MY DREAM IS COMING TRUE". Then the actual chords kicked in and I proceeded to sing the shit out of the song and everyone was cheering me on through the whole thing and it was an incredible feeling. Needless to say, I kicked my dreams ass. But, the strangest thing of all is, after I finished singing I sat down and started telling my friend about my dream and it clicked that subconsciously I had picked the same song I sang terribly in my dream and without even thinking about it I chose that as my first song to sing at Karaoke. Is that intense or what?? I kicked my dream's ASS! The mind is a powerful thing that's for sure.