(no subject)
I know you are dealing with the tasks at hand, but take a moment and look a little deeper. yes, i know. there are important things to be done first. What could possibly replace your hours on the couch reading that book that may help you find your center? and who would want to pull you away from your afternoon run? But sometimes the important elements of real life must pull you out of your bubble. FUCK THE TRUE ELEMENTS!
Why havent you set a date yet? Candice, please. I know you. You are my daughter. Did you forget that I gave birth to you. I may even know you better than you know yourself. I am only going to ask you one more time. Do you really want to marry this boy?
The problem is... I dont FUCKING know. and if i didnt know, wouldnt you think that would be the ultimate answer. They say, "You know when you know." well, Im still waiting.
There are times, when it seems like the stars are perfectly in line and we spend the night laughing and joking and rolling around on the floor poking fun at one another. we tell those deep secrets that only the friends youve had since the beginning of secrets even know. we talk about the future and all of our dreams of traveling the seven seas helping everyone that has any medical need.
The problem is... the wind blows and covers those stars with heavy clouds. I can feel them rolling in over my heart. the temporary leak is then sealed by the humidity and the moment had passed.
There are times when I dont want to finish the day if this is what i have to look forward to the rest of my life. i close my eyes and picture us in thirty years, and I see that classic 50 year old couple that is griping and complaining all day long. He did that. She did this. Oh thatsw just your grandfather, set in his ways.
Problem is... I have other plans for my life.
Problem is... I have a goal to be happy, that I wont compromise.
I spoke with someone to which it has taken me very long to become close. Today I spoke with my dad. Why do you keep pushing the date back? i hate lying. i feel the emptiness of my stomach boiling when i do anything other than tell the truth. it is the responsible thing to do. i am too young. we have too much to do.
May 2008.
Did I push it that far because it was the right thing to give our family and friends time? or to give me time?
I just want to run away.
take me back to the black sand beaches of west coast guatemala. take me to the run down roads of matomoros. take me to chicago or san fransisco or somewhere i havent been. Oh god. I need an escape route.
take me away.
Why havent you set a date yet? Candice, please. I know you. You are my daughter. Did you forget that I gave birth to you. I may even know you better than you know yourself. I am only going to ask you one more time. Do you really want to marry this boy?
The problem is... I dont FUCKING know. and if i didnt know, wouldnt you think that would be the ultimate answer. They say, "You know when you know." well, Im still waiting.
There are times, when it seems like the stars are perfectly in line and we spend the night laughing and joking and rolling around on the floor poking fun at one another. we tell those deep secrets that only the friends youve had since the beginning of secrets even know. we talk about the future and all of our dreams of traveling the seven seas helping everyone that has any medical need.
The problem is... the wind blows and covers those stars with heavy clouds. I can feel them rolling in over my heart. the temporary leak is then sealed by the humidity and the moment had passed.
There are times when I dont want to finish the day if this is what i have to look forward to the rest of my life. i close my eyes and picture us in thirty years, and I see that classic 50 year old couple that is griping and complaining all day long. He did that. She did this. Oh thatsw just your grandfather, set in his ways.
Problem is... I have other plans for my life.
Problem is... I have a goal to be happy, that I wont compromise.
I spoke with someone to which it has taken me very long to become close. Today I spoke with my dad. Why do you keep pushing the date back? i hate lying. i feel the emptiness of my stomach boiling when i do anything other than tell the truth. it is the responsible thing to do. i am too young. we have too much to do.
May 2008.
Did I push it that far because it was the right thing to give our family and friends time? or to give me time?
I just want to run away.
take me back to the black sand beaches of west coast guatemala. take me to the run down roads of matomoros. take me to chicago or san fransisco or somewhere i havent been. Oh god. I need an escape route.
take me away.