God, I love this Writer.
Hallucinations, that was one of the five symptoms of schizophrenia. Molly kept a list of all the symptoms. According to the list, you had to have two of the five symptoms. Hallucinations were one; okay, that was a possibility. But delusions, no way, she wasn't the least bit deluded, she knew she was having hallucinations. Number three was disorganized speech or incoherence. She'd give it a try.
"Hi, Molly, how the heck are you?" she asked.
"Not well,thank you. I am worried that my speech might be disorganized,"she answered.
"Well, you sound fine to me," she said, by way of being polite.
"Thanks for saying so," she replied with genuine gratitude.
"I guess I'm okay."
"You're fine. Nice ass, by the way."
"Thanks, you're not bad yourself."
"See, not disorganized at all," she said, not realizing that the conversation was over.
Other symptoms...um, no, no, and um, no.but then there was a footnote: "only one criterion required if delusions are bizarre or hallucinations consist of a voice keeping up a running commentary on the person's behavior or thoughts."
So the question she had to ask herself, was: "Do I have a narrator?"
"No way," said the narrator.
"Fuck," said Molly.
"Sorry, I'll shut up now."
"I'd appreciate that. I really don't need the 'voices' symptom. Thanks."
"you still got that monster trailer hallucination outside."
I thought you were going to shut up."
"Sorry, that is the last you will hear from me. Really."
"JERK."
"BITCH."
"You said..."
"Sorry."
C. Moore. (only one of the funniest dudes around)
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P.S.
To anyone that has ever borrowed money from me, let me feed them for weeks at a time, or never had to go through a nicotine fit while I was around due to my overwhelming sense of compassion and kindness, please do onto others (ME) as they (I) have done onto you. I really could use the help.You know who you are and I know where you live!!!
"Hi, Molly, how the heck are you?" she asked.
"Not well,thank you. I am worried that my speech might be disorganized,"she answered.
"Well, you sound fine to me," she said, by way of being polite.
"Thanks for saying so," she replied with genuine gratitude.
"I guess I'm okay."
"You're fine. Nice ass, by the way."
"Thanks, you're not bad yourself."
"See, not disorganized at all," she said, not realizing that the conversation was over.
Other symptoms...um, no, no, and um, no.but then there was a footnote: "only one criterion required if delusions are bizarre or hallucinations consist of a voice keeping up a running commentary on the person's behavior or thoughts."
So the question she had to ask herself, was: "Do I have a narrator?"
"No way," said the narrator.
"Fuck," said Molly.
"Sorry, I'll shut up now."
"I'd appreciate that. I really don't need the 'voices' symptom. Thanks."
"you still got that monster trailer hallucination outside."
I thought you were going to shut up."
"Sorry, that is the last you will hear from me. Really."
"JERK."
"BITCH."
"You said..."
"Sorry."
C. Moore. (only one of the funniest dudes around)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
P.S.
To anyone that has ever borrowed money from me, let me feed them for weeks at a time, or never had to go through a nicotine fit while I was around due to my overwhelming sense of compassion and kindness, please do onto others (ME) as they (I) have done onto you. I really could use the help.You know who you are and I know where you live!!!