August Approaches
When was the last time I really used this thing? I've had it for 8 years. Before Facebook, post-Diaryland.
Quit Facebook so when I want to spew things into the ether, I mostly do it on Twitter & Tumblr. Got tired of managing and marketing all the time on Facebook, and of getting caught up with the lives of people I hardly know, having to be connected and "friends" with people I would have no contact with whatsoever otherwise. I guess I'm looking to have more meaningful, deeper connections with people. Even as someone interested in social change, I'm not interested in the potential for movement-building. Maybe the aversion is a side effect of being a marketing assistant at East West Players right now. And of there just being so many projects and causes to support. I felt over-loaded. The worst part is that it started to all feel less genuine.
I feel like el-jay is the last social network-thing I belong to where I don't think about all the different ways I know my "friends" and have to consider what I want to share in terms of how it might affect my professional life. At least not as much. You're it, people. Of the 6-dozen-ish friends here, only a handful still update on a vaguely regular basis. Most of the others probably have long forgotten about this place and never log on. Some people have canceled their accounts entirely. Jumped the Livejournal ship. Lends a kind of intimacy to this space. Maybe it's false. Maybe it's just the Luddite in me. Maybe the word "journal" innately triggers a sense of intimacy. Livejournal as a company seems to be continuing to thrive and grow as a community-- it's just not in the public eye as much.
Am I craving intimacy or distance? Certainly privacy.
I'm taking a hiatus from Long Cool Hallway after three years and over a thousand posts, I started to feel strange having spewed so much out. Like I was sometimes sticking my finger down my throat for the words and gagging and only saliva and bile came out. Sometimes pretty, but still the dregs. Forced. I've been writing more at the LA blog and the food blog, which is nice. Not easy, but fun.
I've managed to read the entire Hunger Games series, Mists of Avalon, and Ender's Game (a re-read). On a science fiction/fantasy kick. Currently at the tail end of Parable of the Sower. So much reading. I spent a lot of time reading "literary" and political stuff in the last year or two. Now I can't even get past the first few pages of Anzaldua's Borderlands. The last thing "literary" thing I read was 100 Years of Solitude. Took a lot out of me even though I was pretty engrossed by it. Some beautiful prose in there along with all the incest and conflict.
I'm obviously looking for escape. The wanderlust, or maybe just a lust for change, tugs. And I'm not quite ready to make a break for it. Financially, emotionally, whatever. I've been feeling like hiding a lot. Hibernating in bed. One night last week, I slept twelve hours, interrupted by a few bathroom breaks and a quick phone call. Six in the evening 'til six in the morning. Maybe I need it after so many years of mostly pushing my body to the edge, not sleeping very much. Life travels in cycles. Sine waves. It's comfortable here.
I finally updated to the new user interface and changed my theme from the very-boring dark one I've used for so long. That feels good, too.
Quit Facebook so when I want to spew things into the ether, I mostly do it on Twitter & Tumblr. Got tired of managing and marketing all the time on Facebook, and of getting caught up with the lives of people I hardly know, having to be connected and "friends" with people I would have no contact with whatsoever otherwise. I guess I'm looking to have more meaningful, deeper connections with people. Even as someone interested in social change, I'm not interested in the potential for movement-building. Maybe the aversion is a side effect of being a marketing assistant at East West Players right now. And of there just being so many projects and causes to support. I felt over-loaded. The worst part is that it started to all feel less genuine.
I feel like el-jay is the last social network-thing I belong to where I don't think about all the different ways I know my "friends" and have to consider what I want to share in terms of how it might affect my professional life. At least not as much. You're it, people. Of the 6-dozen-ish friends here, only a handful still update on a vaguely regular basis. Most of the others probably have long forgotten about this place and never log on. Some people have canceled their accounts entirely. Jumped the Livejournal ship. Lends a kind of intimacy to this space. Maybe it's false. Maybe it's just the Luddite in me. Maybe the word "journal" innately triggers a sense of intimacy. Livejournal as a company seems to be continuing to thrive and grow as a community-- it's just not in the public eye as much.
Am I craving intimacy or distance? Certainly privacy.
I'm taking a hiatus from Long Cool Hallway after three years and over a thousand posts, I started to feel strange having spewed so much out. Like I was sometimes sticking my finger down my throat for the words and gagging and only saliva and bile came out. Sometimes pretty, but still the dregs. Forced. I've been writing more at the LA blog and the food blog, which is nice. Not easy, but fun.
I've managed to read the entire Hunger Games series, Mists of Avalon, and Ender's Game (a re-read). On a science fiction/fantasy kick. Currently at the tail end of Parable of the Sower. So much reading. I spent a lot of time reading "literary" and political stuff in the last year or two. Now I can't even get past the first few pages of Anzaldua's Borderlands. The last thing "literary" thing I read was 100 Years of Solitude. Took a lot out of me even though I was pretty engrossed by it. Some beautiful prose in there along with all the incest and conflict.
I'm obviously looking for escape. The wanderlust, or maybe just a lust for change, tugs. And I'm not quite ready to make a break for it. Financially, emotionally, whatever. I've been feeling like hiding a lot. Hibernating in bed. One night last week, I slept twelve hours, interrupted by a few bathroom breaks and a quick phone call. Six in the evening 'til six in the morning. Maybe I need it after so many years of mostly pushing my body to the edge, not sleeping very much. Life travels in cycles. Sine waves. It's comfortable here.
I finally updated to the new user interface and changed my theme from the very-boring dark one I've used for so long. That feels good, too.