(no subject)
For the past couple of weeks, I have been acting strange...feeling strange. Usually, I am a mild-mannered, good-natured person. My main goal is to make new friends. But recently, all my repressed anger seems to get the best of me. I think I may hay driven my friends away by being an asshole. I haven't had any desire to live my apartment...and the smallest things seem to piss me off.
I don't go to Goth Night that often now, because the people I go there with wanna get drunk and/ or be anti-social. And we just sit there, in a dark, smoky room...no one speaks to anyone, unless they know them. The building is shared with a group of people who don't seem like they want us there. That's not my idea of fun.
I use to go to Eatonville with Jillian or Marinda, but that is getting old. The only thing they do is play role-playing games and talk about wrestling. Then, when I give my reason for not going out to the place affectionately known as the "Cradle of Filth"...someone (who will remain nameless) gets pissed off, gets an attitude and says,"I'm never gonna ask you to go out there again since you hate going out there so much." But that person fails to realize that I DON'T want to go out there. The only time I slightly enjoyed being there in recent times was when I was drunk or high (...and I was too stoned to care or so drunk, I'd pass out)...or the times when Michelle would come over (we would have some good conversations, and I got the impression that she didn't want to be there either.)
But I use to enjoy all of that. I use to look forward to Goth Nights...hell, I use to dress up for it. I would look forward to seeing all the people I knew...but it doesn't have the same affect on me. What is wrong with me?
I don't go to Goth Night that often now, because the people I go there with wanna get drunk and/ or be anti-social. And we just sit there, in a dark, smoky room...no one speaks to anyone, unless they know them. The building is shared with a group of people who don't seem like they want us there. That's not my idea of fun.
I use to go to Eatonville with Jillian or Marinda, but that is getting old. The only thing they do is play role-playing games and talk about wrestling. Then, when I give my reason for not going out to the place affectionately known as the "Cradle of Filth"...someone (who will remain nameless) gets pissed off, gets an attitude and says,"I'm never gonna ask you to go out there again since you hate going out there so much." But that person fails to realize that I DON'T want to go out there. The only time I slightly enjoyed being there in recent times was when I was drunk or high (...and I was too stoned to care or so drunk, I'd pass out)...or the times when Michelle would come over (we would have some good conversations, and I got the impression that she didn't want to be there either.)
But I use to enjoy all of that. I use to look forward to Goth Nights...hell, I use to dress up for it. I would look forward to seeing all the people I knew...but it doesn't have the same affect on me. What is wrong with me?